I only caught glimpses of his eyes while he spoke

words, lacerating this pneuma

and stuffing superlatives in this innermost being.

the wisdom I believed I possessed tumbled like Jericho

and I could hear the audacious screams of the Israelites

like blood torrents in arteries.

it’s a shame, I thought. He had a good heart.

pomegranate pnumbras flicker like fire behind my eyelids

and it burns there, too.

can I leave?

a smooth muscle ***** pumps blood and serotonin through platelets back into arteries

and I hungrily drink this newfound oxygen.

and all around the splintered cage

I saw orange slice smiles and white yacht clouds drifting through a blue ocean.

but a quick slip up pulled me away

and the faceless effigy stood pristine with metaphorical eyes,

of which I only caught a glimpse.

I crave your scent.
I crave your touch.
I crave your mind.
I crave your love.
I crave your eyes.
I crave your voice.
I crave your words.
I crave your stares.
I crave my body burning.
I crave you.

I feel her eyes upon me
Digging into my soul
I can't run from this pain
Simply losing control
For she's force-fed
These demons
There's a loss in my hair
From the stress that's upon me
As if she's always been there
But that's not true
No it can't be
I'm losing my mind
For she's claimed you
Publicly
I'm wishing I was blind
So I can't see
These tricks on me
She's messing with my head
Manipulative
Like a puppet
Maneuvering my limbs with a thread
And I hate it
I shun it
Lock it up tight in a box
But it calls me
It haunts me
Am I not enough?
For you've told me
You've shown me
How I was your world
But can that be the truth now?
Was there always another girl?

                                  
                       ­          Alysia Marie 2018 ©

Exterior beauty is viewed like the average individual passing a painting.
They barely understand meaning, but seem to conclude that the painting is beautiful.

Interior beauty is ignored like the average individual passing a painting.
They understand the surface, they see it's beauty, but the exact story behind the painting is unknown and worthless.

We focus on the exterior, make a decision and leave, but forget that the interior is what will reveal itself louder than the most bombastic exterior.

I can pour my heart out to you and all you’ll say back is
“I love you”
But what does that mean?

When you were sleeping in the car and holding my hand you held on to me so tight I tried to let go to turn the wheel and you gripped even harder. So I drove around a little and let you sleep you were so out you were snoring and in that moment I was sure that you were scared to loose me even in your dreams. And my heart melted. When you kiss me you don’t reach for my pants or my ***** you pull me closer and I can never get enough of your touch and your eyes and when your lips touch mine. It makes my night and my day, and I never thought in a million years we would be where we are now. Last summer left me heart broken but never did I ever regret being with you. And I am so grateful of what we have and share and I hope and pray we never loose it or loose the sight of us. I believe that last summer was a right thing at a wrong time and we’ve reached our time and it’s time to do this right. ❤️