i send my apologies to the one inside

my person, who limitlessly produce words
Stringing it into stories

i got distracted by fear and void

destroying authentic creative

there's a roach
dear ******* god it's a roach
as i'm typing away
all day
i see this roach
i will not approach
there's a duck outside wow!
but oh **** the bug is still inside
oh ****
oh god
oh ****
it's getting closer
pow!
i smack it
it's name was ed
it is dead
bless
the end

but it's not the end
just another distraction
a route to a dead end
the bug may be mush
while my brain's turned to slush

I look in the mirror
I look in my eyes
see all the time
the wasted time

my day is a night
when I wake up
all that remains
is 6 hours of light
I'll make no change
I'll be awake all night
no exchange
for early sleep
unless I obtain
a good reason

lucid, iridescent.
A vibrant remedy
to a gray backdrop.
three months felt like six,
and the past four have felt like two.

A pretty blade on my ear, benign,
what a lovely reminder that
the world can be good again--
you just have to shift the angle
to see it shimmer.

I am having a crisis,
But there's no need to response,
Since I've always been like this
So what else can go wrong?

Being under psychosis,
But you won't notice that
Can't tell you anything
Because you can't handle facts

I know it's a lot
It can be a lot to swallow
But feel my hurt today
To give us better tomorrows

I know it's uncertain
The future becomes unclear
So stop ignoring all the things
That fill your heart with fear

I know, you're a human,
I know, it makes you scared,
Seeing all the work you put into me
With an eye blink disappear

I know, you're human,
I know you are not prepared
But this is the way my life goes
It'll be better if for me you're here