lost in the void
between i love you
and i need you
do you know the difference
because i’m starting to
the difference between
i love you
and
i need you
the difference that can
change our world
and split it into two
a world where
i know
i will endlessly cry
for you

It keeps giving me the chills,
Is it a battle of uphills?
How can I guess the outcome,
When I'm still not clear of what I'll become,
Can I make the perfect choice?
And will I be able to rejoice?

Let’s run
from the inevitable ,
Let’s leave our city,
and buy a hut,
close to the edge
of the world,
Closer to the lies
than the truth,
Closer to the things
that keeps us waiting
for more than misery
and a cloudy night sky.

Let’s escape,
The unexpected,
the inescapable,
Let’s run away.

And if you ever
leave me, my love,
The edge of the world
will comfort me,
In the darkest of days,
On the unstable nights,
I’ll fall through
mountain range,
and waterfalls
of despair,
Just to wake up
by your side.

Just to fall back
asleep to the rhythm
and warmth
of your breath.

let’s run away
to the edge
of the world,
not to jump off,
But for once Live.

Endings lead to new beginnings.
One door closing makes several others open.
Ideally, before the new door **** is spinning,
the old door should be locked with all ties broken.

This corridor between the past and future
makes my cautious and indecisive mind spin.
Invitations from new doors feel like sutures
closing up the emotional wounds on my skin.

The corridor of choices feels like I’m in limbo
constantly being pulled in different directions
surrounded by doors when all I want is a window
which could answer my simple questions.

A window inside the doors allowing a sneak peak
of what life would look like and what may lie ahead.
Would I be happy with him and finally feel peace?
Or will coming home to him be something I dread?

But unfortunately, life doesn’t work that way
and you don’t get spoilers that help you make decisions.
You’re supposed to just breathe, turn that doorknob, and pray
that what stands behind it waiting for you fits your idyllic vision.

Sometimes you need to look back
To see over your shoulder the past,
To remember what brought you luck
And what withered away so fast.

Sometimes you need to look foward
To see the paths that lays down,
To imagine your way even if it's hard
And to realise the happyness sound.

Sometimes you need to look in the mirror
To see your eyes and what's inside,
To learn what you became in life's scissors
And to face yourself with pride.

Sometimes you need to look at the one beside you
To know that he's the reflexion of yourself,
To feel the energy of the self truth
And to the voice of others to not be deaf.

what if my fate lies
on a silver surface?
my plans and doubts
all thrown into a furnace.
be still and figure out
what your heart yearns for

flip the silver coin,
then flip it once more.

i can't hide, no more
i feel washed ashore
i wish i showed more
what is all this for

my head and my heart both ache
how many more pills can i take
is it all placebo in the end
can i become the hero again
or will i just go down a villain
and hate myself for my decisions
i can't be alone, yet i can't leave home
staring at these mold spots that have grown
even thinking makes me feel sick
sometimes i doubt i'll make it through the week
so many wrong things i can't pick one
i've been longing for just a ray of sun
happiness dies fast and regrets last
i even stopped caring about my eyebags
replaying those moments like they'll be different
and i keep asking myself what was missing