He holds my gaze with trembling hands,
A man torn by tides, shifting sands.
He says he wants me—but I know the ache,
The ghost of her still in his wake.

Her name lingers like smoke in the air,
And now his ex—her shadow is there.
Whispered confessions, a flicker of doubt,
A heart that wanders, a love stretched out.

Yet I do not judge; how could I dare?
I see the storm he’s learned to wear.
A mind that battles, a heart that’s bruised,
A tangle of love and paths confused.

I see my soul reflected in his eyes,
A twin flame’s fire, where truth and shadow lie.
I know his hunger, the ache to feel whole,
The battles within, the wars of the soul.
I understand the need, the longing for love,
The self-sabotage, the push, the shove.
For his self-doubt mirrors my own scars—
Two hearts aligned, yet torn apart by stars.

I’m hopeful for us, yet I’ll tread with care;
His patterns linger, my heart’s aware.
Yet I won’t worry, I won’t let the anxious thoughts win.
I’ll trust the journey, let the healing begin.
For love is a path both fragile and strong,
And what’s truly meant for us won’t steer us wrong.

Yet I can’t help it; my chest now tightens as I dream of us:
Will his promises hold, or crumble like dust?
Will I be the anchor, or just another shore?
Will he seek solace where he’s been before?

Still, I’ll stay and never judge, for I know his pain—
The weight of loss, the ache of shame.
I understand the wounds, the scars unspoken,
Our fragile hearts, so easily broken.

I’ll let time flow, let it all unfold,
For fate has a way of taking hold.
What’s meant to be will find its way,
Through light or shadow, come what may.

For if he can choose me, leave the past behind,
I know we’ll find peace in love redefined.
But I’ll still tread lightly, for love is a thread,
And trust is a bridge I’ll build with my dread.

i strip my skin, to show you my flesh. and i am met with tears and apologies muffled by your sobbing. i would cry with you, comfort you, tell you how good of a person you are. but now, my scars revealed again, i point at you shamelessly and i tell you it’s your fault. where sympathy and pity was, i only hold resentment. maybe in a few years i will have clarity, a new perspective, and i will feel guilty for how i was, but not now. you complain about your burdens and i take them on. the weight of it all.
everyday i feel it, my body, dropping a little lower. my feet once stable, now cramping under the pressure. and so i cut myself open and i tell you of my bruised body, but still. you can only cry and look at me, without ever doing anything.

Spitting up blood;
Living, dying,
What's its worth?
I feel as the Emerald Ash Borer,
Hated by those around me
And stamped upon
Until I am eradicated
Whilst those same people
Attempt to find some use from me
Before I am killed.
These are not loving societies,
Reflected in our treatment of others;
It was very nice to have known all of you.

one of my biggest fears,
the thing that i dare not touch—
hope

and yet, somehow
my fists are bloodied,
my grip bruising

i did deign to hope
held it between my hands:
the fragility of wanting

do not let them see me
here, vulnerable, soft
on my knees

praying or begging,
i may not know
all i know is this:

i have found hope
and it is cruel to me
but i am not letting go

All this stress that I bench press is senseless..
But the armor called my mind is dent-less,
My strength is relentless, so its life that i resent less,
Claim my words were hurtful, so i sent less,
They say time is money - so I spent less,
The smell of victory is sweet almost scent less,
Still waiting to exhale like Angela - I'm vent-less,
But i wanna succeed more than breathe - I don't need no air
Life's like Jordan when he sparks, just unfair,
Past is foggy never crystal clear but in a sense,
She said I stole her innocence.
And the sin of men are girls with skin like cinnamon,
Then we're friends -
Caress her chin & I begin to sin again
But it was she who fell on knees,
Cause my words were murderous, some equate to felonies,
In plain sight even Helen Keller sees,
The darkness overtakes unexpectedly
But like Inspector Lee - my sue young was too young but still brought out the best in me.