Who's the psychopath,
Laughing his own cruel jokes?
It's all a crude game,
People's pain.
Oh, she looks OK,
Finally feeling some joy, Let me take that away,
Laugh when she's no more feeling OK.
She wonders what she did to deserve this.
Being the victim of you.
Now she's convinced she bought this on herself.
But little girl, you're innocent.
He feels he must hurt you.
Take the ground beneath your feet,
As soon as you start to heal, Shoots a detrimental thought,
That cuts.
She thinks she's his only,
We all think we're his favorite.
Just stay away from all of us.

There are two things in me:
Sense of belonging is one,
Appreciation is two.
When combined?
This is something I can’t conclude.
I expect too much;
Then regret as much.
Hearing these voices in my head,
That kept me up all night and said,
“Do you think when you are gone-
They will be bothered to remember you?”
I began to reach out with my hand,
Then I started to look like a fool.
“Why would they even remember?”
I couldn’t even give a response.
Because everything it said is true.
I fell into an endless abyss,
With nonstop bickering.
I am starting to lose my sanity
I couldn’t even get it out of my head.
I feel so helpless and afraid,
A feeling of endless pain.
I could feel something so near,
That something is what I despair.
I couldn’t even take it,
I just want to have some rest.
“Why can’t I have it?”, is what I said.
Internally screaming that no one could hear.
A crying for help that no one knows.
The night has become eternal.
Not knowing how much time has passed.
At first, I couldn’t believe,
There are such things possible.
The saying seconds become minutes,
minutes become hours.
So I thought this is what I should pay,
And will continue to stay.

Being alone is

nice, my experiences --


resonate again.

“I like you.”—but not enough.
Not enough to stay, to care,
To see the way I withered,
Piece by piece, beneath your weight.

You took what you needed,
A hand to hold, a heart to lean on,
And I gave until I was nothing,
Until even my shadow felt thin.

Now there’s nothing left to take.
No warmth, no light, no fight.
I have run dry, drained hollow—
I hope I was enough to quench your thirst.

I know our relationship was wrong,
It never should have reached that point.
I thought I was smart,
But your love was some crazy hit.
I was so alone,
In such such mind numbing pain.
You were also mentally ******,
Didn’t realize our relationship was insane.
Why do I still miss you?
And think about you all the time.
When I know you shouldn’t have done this,
Knew from the start it was a crime.
Everyone calls you a sick creep,
And I really wish to believe this.
Because then it wouldn’t be so hard,
I wouldn’t be in painful abyss.
Still can’t believe I fell for it,
Allowed myself to be swept along.
You were there for a reason,
Made me believe I belong.
Made me smile through the tears,
When I was at my lowest.
You really did help,
Made me become my best.
I wouldn’t have fell for it and you,
Unless it was for a reason.
To keep me alive,
But I still have a question.
Why the hell did it have to be this way?
Why the **** did it have to be you?
Why couldn’t the person who saved me,
Be someone I can stay close to?

I wasn't lonely at all, I too had friends before,
We would play, laugh, and have fun,
Get wet in summer from watergun,
And be sick for days calling each other one,
But time past and we said "goodbye",
Despite that "bye" wasn't fine,
I'd be sick for years not for days,
As I couldn't make friends any more,
Even though I made two or three,
They didn't seem to be fond of me,
They would go to parks and walk,
Gaming place where they would play,
Theatres where they could see the play,
Not asking me if could come along,
And thus, I now can open the door,
That I've been not alone before...