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Nicole Oct 2020
I feel the poison as it bleeds
Through my veins and
Each one of my extremities
Burning my insides
Freeing my mind
I freely give up this sobriety
I tried to live cleanly
Taking care of my body
But it never fixed my sanity
The drinks slow me down
Make it easier to cope
With this suffocating anxiety
What good is a life
So easily controlled
By all the darkness inside of me
I ache to be free
To float gleefully
Away from this broken reality
And what I actually mean
Is that I'm ready to bleed
Until I am no longer a part of me
Kyle T Oct 2020
There are tiburones off the Fla. Keys
Believe me, out there in the aqua deeps
Sometimes they swim up into the sandy shallows
But not often;
And usually only at night while you’re on a veranda sipping a
Glass of red wine,
Safe in the glimmer of a tropical neon beer sign
Underneath palm trees.

These tiburones swim off shelves and under cantilevers
Continental shifts in deeps
Sandy bottoms, they cruise by
Like missiles
Fired from dusky deep ephemera
Assimilated by the amorphous ocean infrastructure
Flotsam and careened ships off gray coasts
Rusted and dead steel under the raining ash
And the sea foam that pools around their husks they falter, canted, and tipped
And lost as quick as were, gone, betrayed to the deeps again.

But, sometimes, tropical shallows
A Latin lover's osculant kiss
A fumbling of the belt buckle
Swimming dark waters under moonlight
Dark eyes, red lips
Surl breath dlipped wet
Held in ocean's gentle soul
Pearls aligned distant metaverses
Transcendent, therefore, only Beautiful

They don’t care to bother with you, mostly, the tiburones.
They’re curious, a dorsal fin to cut the surface, an indifferent pass
You are not the wine they seek to drink.

But if you find yourself afloat;
Lost or hurt,
If you venture too far from your shore,
Carried by the gentle waves, the inverse gravity of water
When the ocean seems benign...
...They’ll come cruising.

It won’t take long.

Doll-eyed and mechanical, they’ll swim by
Just to say..... Hello.

I have not seen many tiburones but they impart,
Even to those who have never seen them,
This unspeakable fear:
Not so much of the Ocean—Few ever enter the Ocean
But of some assimilation of thought
Where it passes by from dark end to dark end
Sunrise to sunset, and a portentous silhouette beneath you,
If not of the wry toothed smile, and the porcelain ghost…

Then of what?
Could it be of the thought of teeth?
Or of a malicious ghost agnostic of your importance?
Of the specter that cares not of your potential,
Disregarding your position in this world.
Something that treats you with true Equality-

Could it be the things in this world that say Hello with teeth?
There are abbreviated bits of flesh rent in life.
I wear these battle worn scars.
And not instead of love but because it’s the only way
They know how to smile at you.
It’s how they say Hello.

I only have seen their reflective eyes in the shallows
Off the verandas where I have sat and drank
Drunk myself into a stupor, a vibration in my fingertips, in my mind
No sommelier am I.

The red liquid fills my mouth and paints my teeth an indelible red and drips from my mouth from my ****** lips
I have bit too hard,
And spilled my red wine onto the table
Watching it drip viscously off the table and stream to the floor
And pool in great deep redness on the veranda’s floor
Drops and drops and then, restless, I drop back into the depths
In the dead, burnt-out center of the wine’s pool
And watch it assimilate into the porcelain.

And the deep darkness of the red miscegenates with white porcelain
And it all fades in and out standing on that perfect precipice of wine and violence
The wind and flux of ocean waves and darkness
Those eyes down there, refracting moonlight, deadened orbs
The wine deliquesces from veranda’s precipice to waves
The great adulteration, the miscegenation, it all goes flux.

And I drop off, assimilated into darkness, there:
Where the bits of flesh torn from teeth and I swim away
Dismembered, deformed

And a flutter in the shallows,
A quick, precise splash,
A perfect torsion
Writhing bodies.

And those black eyes roll over white,
And those archaic teeth descend,
And pulled under the dark ocean
Without even the moon to give me my light
And in my breath’s last seconds,
I’m perfectly assimilated into this structure,
Deliquesced, relaxed, and gone into the depths,
Swimming in the sulfuric bottom
Of my glass of red wine.
This hurts to read, only for me. Enjoy.
imehsahdehahs Oct 2020
Rabbit Looked at his

golden pocket watch    

Time Stopped at 11:11

Hundred upon hundreds

knight of xans Drowned

in the bitter Sea of *****

My eyes lost there Shine

The Day that Sky Went Black
  


C.N.S is Down

C.N.S is Down

C.N.S is Down



No HEAVEN or HELL

Just Infinite Darkness


C.N.S Is Down


C.N.S is Down


C.N.S Is Down


No Black or White Coma

I just Died that Day


C.N.S Is Down


C.N.S is Down


C.N.S Is Down
  

No HEAVEN or HELL

Just Infinite Darkness


C.N.S Is Down


C.N.S is Down


C.N.S Is Down
  


No Black or White Coma

I just Died that Day

  

C.N.S Is Down


C.N.S is Down


C.N.S Is Down
  

C.N.S Is Down


C.N.S is Down


C.N.S Is Down


C.N.S Is Down


C.N.S is Down


C.N.S Is Down


"I finally Knew Who I was

When I Died That Morning"
19 years old Xanax & ***** Suicide
came back from the death on the third day
Jenie Oct 2020
I'm telling you that's it, I quit!
A year on now I weigh a ton,
drinking my way out of this pit.

Hotel meals with a book I sit,
a woman on her own must be fun...
I'm telling you that's it, I quit.

Day after day sleeping a whit,
puff in the lungs and pulse on the run,
drinking my way out of this pit.

Monday drive bawl or afternoon fit,
abusing I yell before the sun,
I'm telling you that's it, I quit.

A ring and a promise, we almost split,
I never home or seeking to stun,
drinking my way out of this pit.

I will admit I learned a bit.
Of colleagues and business I knew none.
I'm telling you that's it, I quit
drinking my way out of this pit.
My first job, almost 15 years ago, spending the weeks in hotel rooms, flirted on I learned to bring a book. Unable to sleep, stressed out, crying in the car, eating too much, drinking, smoking, I started having panic attacks and quit after a year.
J Sep 2020
I love you like my favorite poets love alcohol.
Drunk and mad in the streets,
I love you.
I’m wasted.
I am one of my favorite poets.
Krystal M Toney Oct 2020
We were a photograph.
Trapped in a beautiful memory,
blinded by the flash
that imprisoned us within the moment.
I still have our photograph.
Armand-DeamoJC Sep 2020
I never smoked the first cigarette
I never smoked the first joint
I never drank the first beer
I never snorted the first line
I never popped the first pill
I never dropped the first stamp
I never met you
I never found love
I never lost my heart
I never lost my religion
I never lost my friends
I never lost myself
Would I still
Smoke
Do drugs
Drink
Have no real friends
Have no ability to see another woman as she is and not how I want her to be
Would I still look at someone else
And wish
She's you
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