I don't know who I hate more:
          Myself, for loving him
          Or him, for making me

*s.q.

Earl Grey
the only man in my day
he soothes this **** pain away

*s.q.

The salty sweat of his chest
lingered on my lips,
so I tasted

pulled into the depths
of all his discovered
unknowns
my crevices of happy findings
warm tidings
delightful hidings

shut eyes, thoughtful, reliving
memories, flood of pleasure
losing control
I could smell his savage desire,
anticipation giving me chills

we find an everlasting truth
that even though
this distance will remain
we're bound through many domains
and no matter the end result
you and I
can't feel this real
from any other

*s.q.

How do I erase this Janwar
that's clawing, gnawing, destroying my insides
try to cease this current
this ebbing self-control
black-holed sanity of clear thought

Everywhere I go
every sight I see
incomplete without my completeness
you

Stupidity overwhelming judgement
blinding direction of constant withdrawal
an itch

How I wish things didn't happen for a reason
for now, I'd be whole
without a counterpart
missing

A puzzle piece
misleading me to believe
that he
and me
as a we
are meant to be

**** that idiocracy
for whole
I am,
complete,
and you are obsolete

*s.q.