The Tinkerer: Poems

412 · Jul 2016

Echoes

The Tinkerer Jul 2016

Echoes

The echoes carry on.
Voices blaring into the night.
Ricocheting into the depths of an open mind.
Stark, the silence.
Memories rush. So violent.
Echoes, all that remain.
The echoes shall never fade.
Memories bright as day.

Heavy heart, loose smile.
We carry on, pave our way through life.
Echoes reverberate through space and time.
Of friendships lasting a lifetime.

There's a marked and undeniably somber fog that's crawled over our home in the last few days. This fog might clear quickly for some, it might linger longer for a few, but it shall fade with time. And as most memories in life, the good shall be etched into the halls of our minds. A reminder of a home we all once shared.
I'm glad to have known each and every one of you and cherish the bonds we've made.

Whānau.

#love #home #family

405 · Sep 2015

Love

The Tinkerer Sep 2015

Love

Your* existence
Means the existence of sin.
You seem to make the world
Dance to your every whim.
You are the sun, the moon, the earth
And the stars.
You are the one,
For whom bloom the flowers.
You are the reason
For countless empires to fall.
You are, Love**.
You reign over all.

I was just wondering. Seems appropriate.

G.

#love #truth #beautiful #reality #real #grief #introspection #loving

383 · Oct 2019

Next Up.

The Tinkerer Oct 2019

Next Up.

To fall in love.
To be kicked and tugged.
To picking up, and moving on.

To stepping forward.
To find courage, within this coward.
To letting go, of what's already gone.
To what's been said, and what's been done.

I take my hopes, and pack 'em.
Close the door, leave through the back an'
Don't turn round. We could see it crackin'.
To leave before it breaks,
Breaks my heart, but it feels like fate.
Tried to have faith, I made mistakes.

I guess that in the end, we took
What we could get, though there's
Still so many loose ends.
Looked for the closure,
I swear, felt it was getting closer.
Thought, we could make amends, make it better, make it to a better end.
I guess by now I've lost my friend.

Seems that now has turned to never.
So whatever. I tried my best.
I failed this test.

Shattered heart, I pick up the pieces.
Few more shards, and I'm back to being jus'
Who I am, who I'm at peace with.

I'd never be the same,
It won't be so seamless.
I look up, maybe one day I'll see
The one I need, my miracle seamstress.

For now, here I leave this.

From a broken heart, to broken trust. To building this friendship up, to realising, it washes a way, just like mud.

I take on the next day. Move on, move along. Take my heavy heart, my heavy mind. I'm alright. I'll be alright. This sadness will leave in time, if anything I've learned, it's that sadness is just like a tide.

- O. Glad you were once a part of my life. Thank you for what you've taught me.

#love #lost #left #leaving #moving #growth #believe

361 · Dec 2016

.Twenty Three.

The Tinkerer Dec 2016

.Twenty Three.

Things have changed, to say the least.
A long time it's been,
Not many words did we speak.
Though something within me,
Something says,
Some things will never change.
The core of this,
It remains the same.

Separated by seas,
Even by time, as it may be.

I know, though, of yours,
Heart,mind, soul and all.
Are stronger than never before.
From seventeen to Twenty Three.
I'm glad to have been there for it all.

A beautiful inspiration
You will forever be.
Someone to look up to,
For others and for me.

Happy Birthday, Gol.
With another year older,
You get that much closer,
To the world being your very own.

G.
I know it's been long since I wrote to you,
but I just wish I was home to celebrate you. :)

This is an ode to all you are and
all you have the potential to be.
It isn't much, I know,
but I sincerely wish for you the world,
I want you to know that
your friendship is invaluable to me.

Happy Twenty Three, Gol. :)

356 · Jul 2019

Love For One

The Tinkerer Jul 2019

Love For One

In the past,
I'd try to find
A way to love,
Give all the love, all I can,
To all who need, and all who want.

Looked in now,
Cause I've managed to fizzle out.
Burned through the faith,
Left ****** and bare.
Down on that love.
360, no love around.

Used to have all the love for some.
Now I have none for none.
Losses: One for One.

Thought I'd be good to medicate,
Thought I'd see it when I meditate.
Now I dig through all that lost faith, the heartbreak.

Fossilized in a place I so long vacated.
Make a stop on an abandoned station.
Pick it up, or recreate it.
Find what once was fun, was whole, was my day in the sun.

I gotta excavate from what I once separated.
That love for me I had long awaited,
Trip through hell, to see me elated.
Catch my breath and figure it again,

That love for one,
Get it back, For once, for all.
King of my throne, I will be reinstated.

I need to get away from what buried my self love and find myself.
On the path to reignite my emotional wealth.
Have to lean away from what killed my spirit, dried my well.

#self #love #meaning #rambling

341 · Jul 2016

Fly.

The Tinkerer Jul 2016

Fly.

Tonight, as the clouds cry,
The thunder cracks,
And lightning lights up the sky.

A little writer begins to write.
He writes for peace of mind.
He writes a piece of his mind.

This, a feeling so pure.
Parting with a part of his soul.
Strewn, shards on a piece of paper.
So alone, at ease, he's compelled to compose.
Compose the ideas of life
And all of life's lies.
To tell the world,
Not to abide.
To tell the world,
Look that ***** straight in her eye.
Say **** it, and give her a smirk and

*Fly.

A night when creativity visits a writer is a day when a piece of his work feels complete in its own terms. This was one of those days. When the flow did not hesitate, when I was unable to suppress, I just went on. I wanted to tell the world that the things that stop you from achieving and striving for greatness, they do not necessarily have to dictate your life. The only hard part is beginning.

#poetry #dedication #night #writing #write #motivation #work

339 · May 2019

The Devil In Me

The Tinkerer May 2019

The Devil In Me

One said once,
That the empty mind is the rival of God.
At this point I want to believe that it's not.
Preoccupied. My mind, I'm paranoid.

A pit in me, depressed, my anxiety.
A million times I've been asked,
Can you read minds?
I wish now, I could say yes.

For the longest time,
It felt as her mind was moulded with mine.
For the longest time,
I felt I could keep the devil in line.

Now though, I stare him in the face,
I see his menacing smile.

Heat made home in my psyche.
He's shares my soul, he's right beside me.

He sees me write these lines.
Knows what I'm trying to find.
Exactly what I look for, he's managed to hide.

Forever, I thought my mind my strength,
What if, with his help, it becomes my demise?

Self doubt, respect. Rejection and unclear sight.
All these things I'm struggling with,
Though I continue to fight.

I fight because I know I must,
There seems to be no light,
Darkness within,
Has my flame finally found it's cold night?

Questions I can't answer.
Not now. Not today.

My hope is now, I know all that I've lost,
Remember, some time ago I lived without.

I am fighting depression and Anxiety. I do not intend to give up. This is a cathartic piece to help me vent my frustration and come to terms with my situation. Music and Meaning help me find my way through this tough time

#depression #anxiety #fight #devil #survive #thrive

308 · Feb 2020

Family

The Tinkerer Feb 2020

Family

This last Sunday I learned.
A lesson so long it has taken.
That some family don't stop with your first awaking.

Some family is earned.

Some family you ain't born with.
Some family more than an obligation.
Some family you gain with commitment, with dedication.

It don't matter the blood, time, name or location.
When this family been years in the making.
True this what I say, for the process be painstaking.

We've bonded with one another.
Bound by the love for the other,
The good, the bad,
The pain, the smiles we share 'em.
No matter our destination.

To a curious little girl I met near 3 years ago. You mean more to me than you would ever know.

- M

#love #family #blood #life #bonds

293 · Apr 2017

Tonight I Learned:

The Tinkerer Apr 2017

Tonight I Learned:

A Poet's broken heart is like,
A Katana in a monk's arms.

A truth?
- O

#broken #heart

266 · Nov 2018

Reincarnation

The Tinkerer Nov 2018

Reincarnation

From the word,
I've been away,
Creating rhymes,
Had taken a break.

A conversation, just yesterday,
Got me thinking
for the written word,
I still do crave.

To write about love,
To write about fear.
To write about life,
Or this field right here.

With every word I write,
I seem to remember,
The wall's not down,
Though the ladder is near.

Thought I'd grown up,
Left behind my poetic years.
Now I realise,
I stopped out of fear.

But all the while,
I was blessed with an ear.

For now I can hear,
A rhyme within a smile,
Entire ballads in her eyes,
And the beauty of a tear.

This it the second poem of mine in the better part of a year. I just want to be able to write as eloquently as I used to about the many things that have been a major part of me in the last few months.

I have realised that this is one form of release. And it seems to work.
Thanks to the world.

#rebirth #reincarnation #writing #poem #poetry

258 · Nov 2018

Gibberish

The Tinkerer Nov 2018

Gibberish

Broken, bent, beaten and burned.
Spirit weary, and my belief worn thin.

My mind turned,
What I now 'knew' I had to unlearn.
What I now felt, I had to upturn.

To fight the doubt,
To fight the fear,
Took a crack in the shell
For me to peer,
Within.

Realize
I needed real ties,
No half-truths, no fallacies,
No small talk,
No niceties.

I need you raw and real.
My strength is fear.

To face it together,
Win alongside eachother.

A need to learn,
The depths of the world.

Only then could I be me.

Post panic attack and anxiety facing situations. I have had a couple of days to think through all that I have gone through I now I am slowly realising why I am at this point in my life in this way. I hope to make and stick to the changes I know will make my life better.

#self #learning #anxiety #depression #panic #rebirth #mental #health

255 · Dec 2019

Trees That Rise

The Tinkerer Dec 2019

Trees That Rise

You are infinity.
The stars, the moon, the sky.
Resilient, beautiful.
You are genuine.

You are the earth, the wind,
A river untamed.

A magnificent tree, reaching up to the skies.
Deeply rooted,
To the ground upon which you lie.
A shelter to those in need.
I thank you for all that you are,
I look forward to all that you will be.

Just want to wish, in my special way.
To you, a Happy Birthday.

Happy 20.

- O

— The End —