captured in the psych ward, the delusional helper
ron cooper is having memories of his time he had his appendix at royal melbourne hospital
when this delusional marta like man is admitted to his HDU and ron had to take good care of him
by asking him, who do you want to help, the man said, i want to help feed the hungry and ron asked
how are you going to help like that, the man said, i can cook a meal a day, and if i have no helpers
i will do it myself and ron asked, yeah, do you realise you will be rushed off your feet and the man yelled
at ron, SHUT UP YA BIG WALLY and ron started having these visions of him yelling at the doctor who
wanted to take his appendix out and talked to a social worker about it and as he was doing that, the nurses
got a name out of him, but the name was jesus claus, and then the man said, my parents are heavily into christmas
and seeing their last name was claus, they called me jesus, and the nurses went away to work on what medications
jesus claus needs to be on, whilst talking to the social worker who said it might be a good idea to play with him as if he is
making a difference, whether he is or not and at lunch time, ron thought jesus was not fit for the lunch room, so ron bought it into
his room saying, here is your lunch, or helpers need lunch so they can help many people and jesus said, can you give a pass out
so i can council some of these people, involved in this school shooting and ron gave him a plastic card with nothing on it and
told jesus, that every time you want to help someone use the trillion dollars on this card, and jesus asked, how about i have a computer in here
and ron gave him a broken down eftpos machine and told jesus to swipe it in this, and then you watch the news, and they make money
it is all you, ok, jesus said, ok i will help everyone with the doctors money, but ron was risking his job, and had to keep tabs of jesus’s goings on
and another thing, ron asked jesus, we want to help you help people, so i need to know how you do it, and ron gave jesus some risperidal and largactil
to calm jesus’s delusions and in about 1 hour, jesus was too busy helping to eat and when ron came to collect the lunch tray, jesus said
if you ant to help me, give money to the dead and alive victims of the tahiti plane crash, you see i gave them $1,000,000 and they made i and a quarter million
and ron, they need your help and ron said, ok, when i get home, i will give them some loot to save them and ron asked jesus if he wants to join this group and
jesus said, i am too busy, and ron said fine and walked away and after the group was over, ron bought jesus his lunch and said to him
jesus claus, who are you helping now and jesus said there was this kid who was kidnapped by a gangster and i have to pay the ransom out of your money
but this is fun, ron, can i have some more and ron said, ok, i will put money on the card when i get to my office,ok
jesus thanked ron, as ron went back to his office knowing that he is just feeding the dilution into him and when it became time to collect his dinner plate
ron said, my mum and dad and uncle rob told me, you can only help people if you help yourself as well, so ron said, i need to borrow your helping card and machine
and jesus said, i know why you are doing this, you are jealous of my power and my talent, i have this gift of helping people, and ron said, your not helping, you are a marter
and jesus yelled WHY ARE YOU CALLING ME A MARTER FOR, YA **** and ron said, because you feel your helping with broken technology and this made jesus very angry
and ron had to get out of there but when he came back to jesus’s room, the TV was thrown against the wall and he started yelling at ron which made him get the needle and
inject some ******, so they can give the medication to him, and after they injected him with ******, they were forced to inject him with risperidal and largactil to help him relax and calm his delusions
and when ron left, he asked the nurses to call him, if he gets angry and at 4 in the morning ron who was burping pizza, was forced to come to his HDU because jesus was walking around with a dinner knife
yelling and threatening people and ron gave him a shot of ****** and refused to go home because he has so many drugs inside of him, ya know he could die, and as the next day passed
jesus was ok and ron gave jesus risperidal at lunch and went away and gave him more risperidal at night with largactil and then while he was feeling tired, ron bought
a hamburger and a beer and went home to lose himself in prim time TV'