Lost but not forgotten
Is the place that I call home
People here don't understand
Why I am so alone
People here don't understand
What I have always known
Lost but not forgotten
Is the place that I call home

You are so strong,
But feel so weak.
Only thinking wrongs,
And never the things,

Making you,
Nothing to hold,
Nothing to rue.
Don’t ever fold,

These feelings of love,
Know of your strengths,
Shine with your sun,
Not with your hate.

Life is too fast,
For fearful fate.
Please make it last,
Caress every day.

Hold your heart,
Don’t let it go,
I know it’s hard,
But you’ll never know,

If you keep holding back,
Never lighting matches.
You ask why you’re sad,
Cause you’ve never had it.

You’ve done it before,
Now do it again,
Walk fear’s shore,
Make it your friend.

I feel your pain,
I hear your cry.
I’ve felt your rain,
With tears of your sigh.

After I close,
Remember this,
If there’s something to know,
Know you are His.

The night may change,
Infinite difference.
But reject its pain,
Cause you’re never different.

Am I still me?
Am I still m
Am I still
Am I stil
Am I sti
Am I st
Am I s
Am I
Am
A
Am
Am I
Am I s
Am I st
Am I sti
Am I stil
Am I still
Am I still r
Am I still re
Am I still rem
Am I still reme
Am I still remem
Am I still rememb
Am I still remembe
Am I still remember
Am I still remembere
Am I still remembered?

i don’t like what i see in the mirror
because i am nothing more than an ugly mess.

tired eyes
flabby tummy and big thighs
self harm scars
and layers of skins enough to hide my confidence.

i don’t like my reflection.
i don’t like them at all.

i was told that i was perfect the way i am
but then they would tell me
“maybe if you lose weight a little bit more
you could get rid of that chubby cheeks and double chin”.

so i skipped breakfast,
and lunch,
and dinner,
and sometimes i lose control and puke all the way out.
my throat would burn but i felt victorious.

and just like that i spend days and weeks and months and every moments counting calories that will flow down inside this mouth
one hundred
two hundred
not more than three
or else their terrifying gazes will speak to me and say
“ew, disgusting.”

i hate my reflection and i dislike my being
because who would have loved a person like me,
a person with self love the size of a teardrop?

and then they told me again that i don’t have to go on diet because i’ve got the body of Victoria’s Secret’s models

but again,
why would he left me for a girl
well,
she has smaller wrist, bigger chest and she’s always alive
i don’t blame him though
i am really not enough, right?

because anyone can say those three words
and anyone can say you’re perfect
as long as you fit their idea of perfection

i am no goddess and i know my place

but maybe
just maybe
someday,
i will finally be enough.

I’m happy
(I’m depressed)

I love myself
(I hate myself)

I can’t wait to live my life
(I can’t wait to die)

I am lucky to have my friends
(why do they even like me?)

I have a family who loves me
(and I continue to disappoint them)

I am an excellent student
(I can’t focus in school)

I want to travel the world
(will I even live to do that?)

I’m fine
(I’m not fine)

I’m perfectly okay
(please help me)

Happiness was always plural in my mind,
there had to be a he, a she or they,
but as time passed,
I grew to learn that
happiness is a singular ' I '.

Why are we confident
In the sea of people
But drown
In the drops of intimacy