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She kissed me
not because
she wanted to
but because
she could.

We fell in
love.
Not because
we could
but because
we wanted to.

We made
mistakes.
Not because
we wanted to
but because
we could.

We thought
we were
perfect.
Not because
we could
but because
we wanted to.

I vomited in
the bathroom
of a
Baltimore
7-11
because
sometimes
you cannot
hold it in
much
longer.

Her hands shook
as she held her
mirror
because
sometimes
your reflection
can only
tell you
so much.

My body shook.
Her body stiff.
And when
the bodies
move
the hearts
stop.

She lied some.
I drank words.
The veins
in hands
are maps
to imagined
consciousness.

Really,
it's just
a
*******
*****.

Music to
my ears.
Nervousness
between
blinks.
Noise to
my brain.

She said,
"I love you"
not because
she wanted to
but because
she could.

I said,
"I love you, too,"
not because
I could
but because
I wanted to.
 Dec 2014 Monique Olivier
Irish
i write about love
yet i know nothing of it
i dream about love
yet i know i will never get it
not the kind of love
your parents give you
nor the kind of love
your friends show you
i crave that kind of perfect love
that will make your heart feel infinite
that the warm feelings
that you cannot possibly put into words
would feel like it would
never end
that kind of perfect love
that would make your skin
feel like electricity
every time you touch
you feel a shoc-
no
that kind of love that
would make you feel
like a thunderstorm
bright and painful
yet a beautiful kind of pain
that you would willingly so
stand in the middle of a rain
i crave that kind of perfect love
that whenever you feel like
falling apart
you know someone will be there
waiting for you
to fall into their arms
and never let go
but who am i to talk about
love
when i can only
write, dream, and crave
that perfect love
i know nothing of
 Dec 2014 Monique Olivier
blythe
Tame me with your gentleness,
Let me feel your sweet caress,
Heal my wounded heart,
Save it from being torn apart;
This is what I only ask of you -
To me, please be true.
Love's letters clattered in currents
Winds curled to stillness,
in a talus of potpourri,
Season totem, a cluster of hope,
waiting
For one match pulled and struck,
To scare the ghosts from the pyre.
In a choke of smoke
from sweet attar,
Loves heat fans
the embers within
the hearts own fire.

So many words
wrenched from mouth
and wrought from hand
Contortions,
twisted spoken grip,
we strip the evergreen needles
from the bough
and let them fall from the fist,
Sprinkling fir
To the earth as grist.

Had not a sentence stretched from
pulsing ink well
by plume to parchment, or
from warm breath of lip’s beseech
What then of our night would say,
And of our day to listen.

If we do not dare with deeds to fly
Then the falling never ends,
And poem, eternal, ne'er to begin
Loves expression, not its desire,
Is the cachet
to which both life and death aspire.
Down the street
I will meet
The girl that changed everything
Taught me to love
Hate
And reciprocate
We don't talk much anymore
Talking is such a bore

I like to think
She thinks
About that loser
But if she did
Then he wouldn't be
Behind this screen
Talking so clean

I know it's over
I know Clover
And we only hung out
When I was sober
I don't regret it
I'm actually glad
Because then i was
stupid, mean, and bad

This isn't making light
Or making sense
But making love
Wasn't a penance
Making me who i am
Is a million and one thanks

So thank you
Whatever you're doing
If you're moving
Or soothing
Someone else at night
Because, for a while,
You were my only light

                                                          ­                  With Love,
                                                           ­                                       **E.H.
I know this may make a few people unhappy but there's no denying it happened and....and I'm thankful for it.
Your mind is like an ocean
that I want to spend all my time
exploring

Your mind is like the sun
I think of your thoughts in the same way
I think of rays
They spread
from you to me

Your mind is like a tree in the autumn
Thoughts scattered all over your brain
the same way leaves are scattered
around my front yard

Your mind is like that puzzle I can't seem to solve
and I think I might like that
The fun in you is that there's always
something new to understand

Your mind is like that new album I have on replay
because no matter what I do
I always seem to replay pieces of you
in my mind
over and over again
I love your mind, you're a mystery I'll never solve.
 Dec 2014 Monique Olivier
RC
Your eyes burn in eager greens
hazel upon inspection
little strokes of fire in between
Your lips part with intention
always standing by every word
I can feel sparks illuminate our contentions
but it was deviations of feeling we always seemed to have heard
Hands that want to hold but search for answers on my skin
kindled comfort in passion
felt their way in
You intoxicate every cell
and I'd rather not explain
how each excessive thought is a sweeter taste of hell
a simpler dose of pain.
Do you see this smile?
You fixed it here,
when you are near
it blossoms open like a lotus.
You know my heart is like a stage play,
I have showed this thing to everyone
and their mother,
but
I've come to learn a thing about fire.
How it relates to love
and more specifically to us.
I've learned that lust, even when laced
with genuine sincerity among the fringes,
is a wild fire
that binges on gasoline and dry wood.
It burns long and bright,
but doesn;t always last the night.
I've come to learn a thing about fire,
how it relates to the emotion I feel
when I peel myself from the bed
and you are still there,
a love planted in the soil of respect,
with admiration as fertilizer
is hardly a flame at all.
It is a candle flame,
that stays within bounds
and unless smothered
will last the life of the candle.

Call me sentimental, call me a poet
I love the things you call me
and you **** well know it.
There will be no other ways to show it
because although my heart us a stage play
with comedy component,
I have shown it to everybody,
but only you own it.
I sat on the cold hard ground
My tears soft as the velvet cloudless sky
Slowly breathing
Inhaling one star at a time
Trying to light up my mind
Feeling the ice crack within my lungs
Everything is in slow motion
My blood no longer runs like a rapid thundering river
Slowly it seeps through the broken arteries of my heart
So much has changed, I think of how much I have aged
I can feel the invisible demons clawing their way back
I will sigh as I can hardly control them
As they multiply like a virus
They are silently waiting now
Waiting for something
The perfect moment to release their toxins
But for now
I lay on the silent ground
Listening to the earth breath
Allowing the winter night to swallowing me
Nature keeping the demons at bay
Thinking of you brings waves of tranquil anxiety.
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