Let's talk about silence
Because I think my words are failing me
For the first time I'm out of phrases
My tongue is tied, its happening very rapidly
I think I might be judging you
For the same mistakes that I've shared with you
But I'm putting you under the spotlight
Scrutinising more than you're giving to me
And all in silence
Hush, don't speak, I'm out of talks to talk
Let's just walk the walk
And stand apart;
One feet
Because it doesn't make sense
Two feet,
I think I'll step a bit farther more
Ten feet
I want to be untied and set free
Forty feet, fifty, a hundred, thousands
Infinity
Don't want my heart to skip a beat, anymore
It does though
Because I think I've leapt a bit too far-a-way
Thousands- a hundred- fifty- forty feet
I think I'm retreating back a bit
Two feet
I'm sinking into the ground
A final leap
One feet
I knew I couldn't do without you for long
You hug me// you couldn't either
My tongue is tied, it's happening very rapidly
//entangled in yours
For the first time I'm out if phrases
//you're gazing at me
Because I think my words are failing me
//yours are creeping onto my existence
Let's talk about silence.

Tell me a tale
Those that you bear from distances
Those that you covered with your feet
Those that you ran with against the wind
Those that you swam with ripples in oceans and seas
Those that you got out from that nomadic women's eyes, deep
Those you wept with in your dark nights
Those that stitched your heart back, glueing it back to its place
Those that take you back to the greener pastures and yellow meadows
Those which are rusty, covered in the dirt of that high trek you took
Those that I might have heard, recite them to me again
Tell me a tale
Help me put together my pieces, pull me out of my salvage.

Its the first photograph in my mind, of you, when you stood out in a crowd of a thousand.
For me that moment is the first touch when your eyes met mine questioning why I wouldn't stop looking.
Its was the first time you cried on my shoulder and my heart wouldn't stop crying too.
For me it was the first time we stood ten feet apart and it still felt as close as a heartbeat to me.
Its the first love, you're going to be my first till my last.

I tried to walk
About in the woods
And dense evergreen forests
That are filled with monsoon
Which would've hit it moments back
And before the roots could actually seep it all in
The mangroves witness the shower again.

I tried to romanticize
Scribbling about the way he'd curl up
Beside
His fingers in my hair
Each strand longing for his affection
Longing this magnetic attraction
Between my hair and his stubble face.

I tried meeting people
Having interactions in my head
Portraits of people and learning
About their cultures and
Means of existence and more.

I tried to write
I tried to write impossibly
Of the things I'd never lived
Witnessing is an act,
Living is a dream.

I tried dreaming
I tried dreaming of all that could be
Could have been;
All the intricate fallacies
The make believes.


I was trying to write impossibly
Of the things I'd never lived
And then reality struck me.

Bloated memories of you
Tonight, you chase me into fireworks
Its not making sense
Any of it
Why would you caress me so deeply
And near the lake of our love
You dissolve
Fading away,
Ripple by ripple.

You chased me into fireworks
And the last smile that I saw
Took my breath away.

I'm like the books I read
The songs I listen to
The places I travel
Ever expanding
Never ending
Full of hope
And mystery
And secrets of her own
Maybe hiding here and there
A few of others too
Doesn't mean you can read in me in numbered pages
Bookmarked and come back to, later
Or fast forward and listen to your favorite part again and again
Or scribble onto over the bark of a tree for to help trace you back your trail
No.
I'm the unaccounted stack of books
That you've read till date
That song of the 90s maybe
Playing on the radio after long
Bringing back a smile on your face
The place you've not been to in a while
And walking up to it again takes your breath away.

I'm the hope that keeps you alive
That one day, some day
It'll all make sense.

Shards of words
A stack of blank papers now unstacked
A trail of coffee
Traced from the machine right next
To me, I love it black
And a quill
In an open bottle of ink
My thoughts spilled on it like oil
Shards of words
Refusing to dissolve or
Come together
Shards
I lie there cursing the night
the dawn to break
For in moonlight you appear all but a ghost.

~~
*When I saw grandma was spinning yarn at moon
Mother's lullaby was just a fairytale
The measure would not have to weigh the legs
Flew colorful kites in the sky
Had a chat with friends at idle hours
The dreams came but never went with wind
We, all friends were wandering in a fairyland
The words of the poem as the rain came
She loved to hear the poems
When romance flowed with blood
Air, flowers said Spring
When in a lazy Summer afternoon  
She stood at my door
Sitting beside me
Sang a song of future
Lost ourselves
When time moved in the forth dimension  
You and me
Sometimes Sunshine,
Sometimes Rain
Horizon spoke with Rainbows
Then dreams played with my blue Sky
And I was bright as the Evening Star
 ~~
@ Musfiq us shaleheen