She was like a cup of coffee.
A plain, black, cup of coffee.
She kept the world awake.

Her personality was warm,
But she had a bitter aftertaste.

he asked her a question
that made her want to walk away
it was something about the truth
she had just met him
it was already too heavy
he told her
he didn’t change clothes in a phone booth
he didn’t
ride white horses down main street
he just wanted to fall in love
before the sun went down

she couldn’t see it
but she felt it all the same
he didn’t have the time
still he had the heart
would it be enough
his eyes revealed no regret
he felt one thing only
the strength to be alone

she never answered
she had her own problems too
she decided he was an honest man
growing older meant a lot of things
what did she mean to him
love is a stranger sometimes
it was up to her
it always was
the men are always willing
but she wanted to wait
to watch one more sunrise

she wanted his aggression
even if she turned him down
no man was worth his fears
how could he handle her?
if he was afraid of rejection
then he was not strong enough
if only he knew it would work
but beauty makes you wait

And everything I saw
everything I felt
everything in front of me
everything that told me no
was silenced
paused
then it sang
and
I
danced

You are not pretty

You are beautiful

Your eyes are not shiny

They sparkle with joy and laughter
They give you away when you are lying
They let me see your soul and how you see the world

Your face isn’t carved

It’s molded to form a shape that is unique to you
It holds the years of laughter around your eyes
And the things you’ve conquered in the grooves of your furrow

Your cheeks are too fat

They are every smile you’ve ever had
Ones that you have shown to the world without fear
Some secret for only you to remember

Your hair is messy

Depicting your free spirit and that hunger for adventure
Gliding in the wind
Effortlessly falling into chaotic glee

Your smile is wrong

Because it takes everyone’s breath away
Your genuine smile is more precious
Than every lost dream

Your laugh is weird

Weirdly insane how I can know so much
About your inner most being
When those few notes of bliss escape

Pretty is only a fleeting word of appearance

Beautiful
Is you at your raw state when you are crying in grief
Laughing so much you feel as though you’re about to burst
Watching the sunrise closing your eyes and breathing in the early morning air
Chatting to the old lady down the road and asking her about her day
Saying goodnight and good morning to the people you love
Marveling at the stars that litter the sky above
Letting adoring two year olds follow you around taking their hand in yours

It is everything you are
You have been
And will be

You are not pretty

You,
you are beautiful

The sunlight fell
scattered as my thoughts
trying to meet
my heart warm and pulled
head swaying with the breeze
I saw me
And I turned to myself and said
I' ve missed you
now time to be free
I looked myself in the eyes and said thank you
that's all I will ever need

So there I was,
running and running
trying to catch up with the sun,
with all my hopes and dreams.
I was right at an arms length,
until then I woke up

I've left myself empty,
By helping everyone I know,
And now I need to build,
But don't know where to go.

I can finally see,
What i need to do,
I need to care about me,
More than I care about you.

In an affair of infatuation
that happened to me in high school.
She was heartbroken and told everyone.
Then I became the fool

Yeah it was me

I wanted to taste a big chunk of life
At 17 I did not want a wife
She held my hand, she kissed my lips
She told me when she does her heart skips

We couldn't agree

Despite the feeling of egregious lust
This was not a relationship I could trust
She told me she lies awake and thinks of me
To satisfy my ****** lust how easy could this be?

I feared entrapment

Her smooth skin and pretty face
Was it worth the price of self-disgrace
In class, she never took her eyes from me
I was not overjoyed with glee

A clinging vine

Although her company was great at first
For entangling vines, I did not thirst
She demanded my 24/7 attention
To escape her, I earned detention

Obsession or Possession

Her professions of love and eternal possession?
Without my kiss, she'd have depression
She'd call me at all hours of night
And not hang up until daylight?


Hostage to her needs

I started to get concerned and did not call
Or I'd not show at her place at all
She threatened all sort of self-harm?
Once she had even cut her arm.?

What do I get that remains me

She didn't know love from manipulation
How could I have loved self-mutilation?
This was changing from crush simple and sweet
To a horror from which I wanted to retreat.

Sometimes it is greener

I pulled the plug and sought greener pastures
I wasn't kidding this was not empty gesture
This was nothing like love and more like a hi-jack
All I was doing was taking my life back