Your words can’t hurt me,
Your words don’t pierce,
An already calloused soul,
Your words are understood,
Their negativity was noted,
But they couldn’t put another bruise on a heart that is raw,
For my own thoughts now,
Do more damage  than yours ever did,
Push, pull, crack,
Another piece floats by,
As I speak this lie,
Again,
I ripped off my nerve receptors,
And though my limbs may still take a beating,
I swear I’m numb to your work,
But their content is quiet fuel for my fire,
And hatred is strong in this one,
Turned towards self,
Not strength, not better than outward hate,  
Nothing short of perfect love can save me now,
Only deepest thoughts about me can erase my list of error,
Can, inside my rotten soulkeeper,
Place a rainbow of affection,
And bring happiness to an ever worried soul.

Do you know what it's like to be me?
     To think so much
     Your eyes start to bleed
Do you know what it's like to be me?
     To hate your own reflection
     So much you can't eat
Do you know what it's like to be me?
     To despise your own addiction
     To the extent that you turn back to it
Do you know what it's like to be me?
     To be in so much pain
     More is what you need
Do you know what it's like to be me?
     To be terrified
     And want to die
Do you know what it's like to be me?

It comes upon you slowly at first
You believe it can be handled,
Can be controlled.
But you are so terribly wrong.
You are so weak,
You have no power of its control on you.
No power when
It quickly eats away your soul.
And changes you.

As I look into this mirror, words begin rushing through my mind.
I think to myself;
How could anyone ever love her?
How could they look at that repulsive body and be attracted to it?
For she is not beautiful.
She has asymmetrical features,
A sagging face that reveals her sadness and exhaustion,
And scars hidden by meaningless bracelets and her old red sweater.
How could someone love her, having known how she treats herself?
How could they handle the baggage she carries everywhere on her shoulder?
Her nervous habits, her inability to handle stress and her tendency to cover up her problems that show through her face with makeup are only the beginning.
How could he have loved her?
How could he have been attracted to her boney hips and large legs?
Did he know how she treated her body?
Anyone could’ve seen it.
I can't understand how he loved her crooked smile,
Her loud obnoxious laugh.,
Her obsession with horses,
Or her large hands and feet.
Did he ever really love her?
Because she doesn’t love herself, so how could anyone else?

There was nothing he could feel, he thought,
nothing but the surging of words blotting his sleeves,
creating marks of what he should've said
yet he never did.

There was nothing he could see, he thought,
nothing but the reflection in the mirror he loathes.

There was nothing there, he thought,
nothing but the menacing screams
of his abandoned self
bouncing off the walls of his home,
pleading to be brought to life.

For a second he thought he was getting benumbed,
like those he senses were just a delusion,
a disguise that he wasn't in agony
for the tormenting hands of reality.

I've started a habit, I ignore the best of advice.
I see the gold but I can't reach out and grab it.
My chances lost, thrown away, life doesn't suffice anymore.
Just shouting at the god that has ****** me!!
**** it!! He strikes me, smites me, I can't fight back and he bites me.
Self belief burned and buried, self esteem shot down and slowly drowned.


The power I crave is unteachable, untouchable, unreachable and unbearable.
I have such foolish ambitions and desires.
Never to have greatness and my helpless soul is on fire.
Duck, drop and roll, send me to the poles to freeze, please!!
Reduced to begging, I'm a disgrace, you better take that ugly grin off your face.
I'll continue to flow It like a poet so that you feel my self loathing.


I turn on the TV and look at the news, It's not good apparently.
The whole world's becoming a zoo, It's so true.
And guess what! The sky's not even blue, It's red!!
No wait; thats just the pain in my head, pain from exaustion, or maybe just hunger.
Life's a mess.
I need to get this crippling weight off my chest, can you help me?


Force the world off my chest, then I'll carry it on my shoulders.
Gonna live like this until my fragmenting fragments are broken.