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1.1k · Aug 2012
Nightmares
Katlyn Orthman Aug 2012
The forest floor along my bare feet,
I'm searching, but for what I'm not sure ,
Looking past the thick withered trees,
Looking past the billowing leaves,
Something churning inside me,
Knowing?
Instinct tells me not to go any farther,
But curiosity pushes me farther,
The soft rush of water,
I step hastily into the stream,
Water slithers its way up my body,
Encasing me completely,
Trembling from fear,
But I still breath,
Hurriedly  looking for evidence of what happened,
But my skin is dry,
Confused but not wishing to remain,
I walk on deeper into the forest,
Darker it becomes,
Harder to breath the air so thin,  
A soft whisper brushing past my ear,
But no ones there ,
I look towards my feet,
Blood pooled,
Words in a enigmatic language,
Carved into my flesh,
A scream stuck in my throat,
Whispers fill the forest untill the sound like screams,
All goes silent,
I fall into the hands of the dirt,
And then I wake panting in my room,
1.1k · Oct 2012
Happy birthday to me
Katlyn Orthman Oct 2012
Passing of time
Another year
Older this day
The signs are here
Im happy yet sad
Because of my growing age
This is bad
Like I'm on a stage
Everyone expects a show
Expecting magical tricks for me to grow
But I feel the same no older then yesterday
It's driving me insane
This constant responsibility
I'm a teenager for Godsake
Don't spoil it now!
I'm not an adult
Just leave me be
Before I'm cast into the retched society
Reality *****
It was my birthday today :)
1.1k · Mar 2013
Star Blanketed Porch Light
Katlyn Orthman Mar 2013
The stars are prettiest
From the spot on the porch
The one that looks out at the snow covered tress
The light above the door
Swings in the Wisconsin breeze
Silent and cool
I sit in nothing but my grandpas oversized sweat shirt draped over my shoulders
It smells of whiskey and cigarettes
But for some reason I close my eyes
And draw in a deep breath
The door creaks open
And a rough ragged voice calls my name
Asking me if I was going to stargaze like a love struck ***** all night
Only a little longer
Tell my heart feels somber
And I can get on my feet again
I say smiling
1.1k · Dec 2012
Famine
Katlyn Orthman Dec 2012
Prayer sometimes isn't enough
Ground and battered
The days grow rough
They rip our wings
from our backs
Forbidden to sing
Finding no sun, the days lack
Death snuck up behind the child
Decaying and rotting while still alive
Hungers fingers taunt and tease
Their home was plagued by disease
Skeletons roamed the grounds
Crying children all around
Drink from the hands of TheMother
But it poisons their small bodies
Big eyes stained by famine
Stare into mine
Oh sweet child
So carefully pick her up
I knew she was dying
And I fought back crying
I held her in my arms
This life was only harm
We lived in hell
Dying in the arms of Mother Nature
Will we survive?
Or will we die
1.0k · Dec 2012
The way to greatness
Katlyn Orthman Dec 2012
Sun setting, disappearing beneath the sea
The slight sadness that was left whisked away
I was there, thinking of my life
And it had struck me
Like a bolt of lightning shot from
The heavens fingers
I was wasting time , I was wasting it on what?
Bits of hurt feelings , and pity for myself
I got up and made my way to the waters edge
And watched my starry reflection
Being pulled in different ways
As the sea breathed
If I wanted to be great
If I wanted to make a small mark
In the big world , I couldn't just sit on the shore
And wait
I have to pursue the fleeting possibilities
I have to open my mind to things
If I wanted to be great I had to think for myself
I have to stop dwelling on little things with
No relevance
Moving onward , walking across the waters
To capture the sun
In my palms
And rise my hands to my ancestors
As an offering
That from this point
I will put forth the strength and integrity
I pledge to have
That I will push my way through if at first the way is to small
1.0k · Jan 2014
Inside This Solemn Hour
Katlyn Orthman Jan 2014
Decaying inside
I'm rotting away
In this solemn hour
I peel away

Redeem my aching soul
for I'm soon to meet my end
I feel it there
just around the bend.

This beast inside of me
clawing to get out of this cage
is foaming at the mouth
in all it's pent up rage.

Decaying inside
I'm rotting away
In this solemn hour
I peel away

I send out a prayer
lost among the roar of gun fire
these dark wishes cloud my mind
breaking free are my darkest desires

I cry out in pain as I am morphing
insanity is all that is left behind
and I have not one clear thought
in my overdrawn mind.

Decaying inside
I'm rotting away
In this solemn hour
I peel away
1.0k · Jun 2014
War of Hearts
Katlyn Orthman Jun 2014
A glass breaks
They're mad again
Dad stayed out last night
with his best friend

She's crying
Heart broken on the floor
Her boyfriends fist crashed through the wall
her face, and then the door

He's drinking
Tipping the bottle back to erase the pain
She broke his heart again
he feels insane

He's barely alive
She's threatening to let go
Her beating heart
Is all that he knows

She's a single mother
Her children are her life
She seen their father
Out with his new wife

They can't get away
From the war in their hearts
The guns the bombs...
Are tearing them apart
Just a small poem on love, and that's not to say that it's all bad. I think there are ups and downs in everything we do, and each is just as important. We can't let the bad things break us, but use the lessons in them to make us stronger.
1.0k · Dec 2013
Scarlet Colored Snow
Katlyn Orthman Dec 2013
Shut my eyes
Feel the sting of cold air against bare skin
Tangle your fingers in the frozen tears
They fall for us
No one is there
But I hear them near
All in agony
I sit in snowy fields

These tears promise revenge
But this heart promises pain
Your words whisper love
But your actions speak of hate

I am alone in this cold place

The stars disappear
The end is near
Give me the thorns of roses
The pierce my heart

This sacrifice is for you,
As the roses turn blue
And our love spills as scarlet staining the snow
Well I have no idea where this came from, but it is what it is.
Katlyn Orthman Sep 2012
Angels are crying
as i stand on the edge of this bridge
i pray that i have the guts
maybe i shouldnt
but what am i living for?
nobodys there
nobody will stop me
but still my heart sputters
a beat that doesnt sound right
but i hurt so much
everydays a struggle
i fight back the suffering
choke back my cries
i look in the mirror
a face undeserving of
happiness
trying to hold myself together
trying to hold them together to
wish i could cut these suffocating strings
wrapped around me
binding me
chaining me
here
wish i could spill everything im feeling
but the words dont exist
i wish i could take this all away
but theres no way
i can only silence them for a minute
as i stand looking down at the swishing swirling
water below me
maybe it would be fast
maybe it would last
1.0k · Sep 2012
Undying love
Katlyn Orthman Sep 2012
Beware the steps you take
Are hazardous,
I am dangerous
Your fragile hands can break so easily
Think of your heart my dear
That would be tragic
If I tore from you
Your beating heart
My love is undying in your eyes
But I am not one to be loved
I do not deserve your faithful gaze
I hand you back your heart
But keep mine
I will always remember you love
For all time
Katlyn Orthman Oct 2012
Missing you when I am the one
Who banished you
From my life
In your looks
There isn't anything to special
But it is not your face or body
That draws me to you
It's the tug of your heart to mine
For some unfounded reason
It's you I always glance back at
And I know you have the worst habits
But we are young
There's room for mistakes to be made
So we can grow
But I feel as though if I confess
I might just make a mess
Of these stitches we finally managed to sew
If I tell you my secrets
Will you take me in your arms?
Or will you cast me away?
This deliema has me restless
When I see you
I avert my eyes
Because you can always read what lies behind
The green walls to my soul
Maybe I was to scared and to young
Before
But now ... I just want to know
That I didn't leave your mind so soon
Possibly .... That when you claimed
You .... Loved me
You ment it
I was scared back beneath my covers
By that four letter word
I've seen , I've felt it used to betray
Used to hurt
My bruised heart
Beats with a ragged thump
Do dare I risk the last pulse on you?
1.0k · Feb 2013
Freedom from a world of pain
Katlyn Orthman Feb 2013
These chains across a battered soul
The fear that never becomes whole
The page I seem to always skip
The path I seem to always slip
The cry that always seems to bare
The pain that always resides there
The broken that no one understands
The survivors that dropped each others hands
The song that never meets its end
The perfect life that's always pretend
The love that doesn't exist
The ones you always seem to miss
The memories that seem so faded
The wounded hearts so filthy and jaded
The need to just be numb
The constant reminder that you're dumb
The words that cut deeper than knives
I bless your heart if you survive
1.0k · Oct 2012
Nighthawk
Katlyn Orthman Oct 2012
Predators eyes
Wings out spread
Softly brush
The air
Waring screech
Colder air
Two distinctive
Strips of white
Nighthawk
Katlyn Orthman Nov 2012
My heart trembles
As I stand above the air
Floating
Soaring
No words to describe the impossible
The sun in my reach
The moon lays hidden
But I can feel it
A wingless bird
Flying higher than the rest
My dreams in pursuit
So close to my fingertips
So tangible
I'm breathing in the possible
That line that had been drawn
Was being crossed
All my hope regained
That had been lost
Encircled in the clouds
Smelled of opportunity
997 · Nov 2012
Exhausted
Katlyn Orthman Nov 2012
I had walked in the light once
But again I've been devoured by the dark
Which way left or right?
I can't see to decide
It wouldn't matter anyways
They won't give me a choice
Because I lay down ,
And let them take away my voice
Trampled over stomped and smashed
Pushed around hated and bashed
Angrily I brush away
Frustrated tears fresh today
Angers stewing and dwelling
My heart is thumping and swelling
Ah! Scream at the heavens
Breath deep and count to seven
I feel as if the sky is falling
In my head voices calling
Just give me some rest
Im trying! Trying my best
And the rest I leave in the end
997 · Oct 2012
Madre De Los Gatos
Katlyn Orthman Oct 2012
Sharp golden eyes
Peer from the trees
Soft rhythmic purr
Summons me
Interest peeked
A calling
Of hope
Hello?
Don't leave
I will walk among you
Sisters
I will travel the soil path
Up the hills
Past the clearing
To the cave
That seems to ward away
All the evil
Her long body
Slouches into the mouth
Golden eyes
Lighting the way
My bare feet
Against the cold stone
I grip my arms
Where do you take me
Madre De Los Gatos?
Where do you lead
Beautiful Pantera
I see
You show me my path
I will walk straight
Among you my sister
Thank you
995 · Jul 2014
Transcendence
Katlyn Orthman Jul 2014
Behind a curtain
Blind to the eye
To this I am certain
The Dead Land resides

Watch with my soul
I seek thee
I stare into the scrying bowl
I see thee

Crying these diamond tears
Screaming your name
It falls to deaf ears
Darkness you remain

Knocking on the livings door
You want to be known
Your heart beat, no more
Like a bad call through a phone

You're fading in and out of life
The light no where to be seen
Shadows impale your being like a knife
And you're silent as you scream
995 · Aug 2015
Limerence Among Stars
Katlyn Orthman Aug 2015
Beneath the eyes of a gleaming sky
Each light a smatter of fire inside
I watch transfixed as those stars align
Painting a love that lived and thrived

Quaking, it rose mighty on weary bones
A muse of it's own damnation
Convinced it may always wander alone
It stumbled upon the light of it's salvation

No longer afraid of the dark and the nightmares it hides
It cracked the glass around it's wounded heart
And pushed aside the walls it once relied
To open eyes that vowed to never part

*And kindred hearts sparked flames of passion
These hearts of the same dream
A heart that once gave love in ration
Was bleeding love in a steady stream

It laid to rest those broken bones
For now it walked on bones of steel
It laid to rest that empty home
And finally allowed itself feel
987 · Sep 2012
Observe
Katlyn Orthman Sep 2012
I see but I don't observe,  I see these trees' but do I actually see them? the billowing leaves in their natural luster, I see them as not individuals but a thick cluster, I observe and I see that each is different, some yellowing, some turning a vibrant red, and some as green as when they first sprouted, this same principle goes for how I see but do not observe people, I see hair color, skin color, eyes, and shapes, but I have not observed
Had I, I could've seen personality, my foolish eyes lead me to see apprence, so I will not judge by what I see, but of what I observe
Wrote this after a test I took in language arts, there was nothing else to do so I thought, why not write a poem!
976 · Jan 2013
Broken pieces
Katlyn Orthman Jan 2013
I have been left here waiting
For you to stop breaking me
And the thoughts I'm debating
Are starting to frighten me
You said that I was nothing
A meaningless pice of dirt
But I thought I was something
And that's why it really hurt
To think I was in your heart
Was so foolish I could die
And tragically fell apart
From all your deceitful lies
I am broken pieces lying about
Be careful you might slip and cut yourself on the glass
975 · Jan 2014
Forgiveness
Katlyn Orthman Jan 2014
I think I finally found the key
the mangled twisted broken key
to unlocking this broken mess inside of me
Inside of the piles of memories

Most tainted by what you've done
and some bent by what I've become
from the way you took what belonged to me
and left me broken and angry

By the way you ruined my life
and the way you beat the kids and your wife
By the way you lured me in
and unleashed demons on me that still haunt me from within.

You took my childhood straight from my arms
and you broke me into nothing.
I still see your face inside my dreams
hear your laugh as I would scream

I still cry when I hear your name
and when I think of you all I feel is shame
because of what you did
I have always hid

I am afraid of the world outside
because of the words you've left burned inside
I can't look people in the eye
because of you

But even though you're the monster of my nightmares
I am not scared
and I have only three words to tell you
even though I hate you
I forgive you
It takes too much energy holding on to the past, and forgiveness is the bravest form of strength. Let go of the things holding you back, and move forward. Take control.
965 · Sep 2012
First day jitters
Katlyn Orthman Sep 2012
I lay here picturing how this school year will be,
Even though I know it will never be what I imagine,
There will be drama, and hurt feelings,
Tears, and laughter, love, and love loss,
Laying here I'm anxious to find out, but also scared,
I'm not a really shy person, but my insecurities always seem to drag me away from my true potential,
Maybe this year will be full of good memories,
Maybe it will be my worst year,
But it does no good to lay here,
Torturing myself with the "maybes"  Or "what ifs' "
I have to live and endure it to truly find out
Not much of a poem, but I needed to get this out so I can sleep and see what the first day of school has in store for me
964 · Sep 2012
Temptation
Katlyn Orthman Sep 2012
Steal my breath to breathe as your own, gazing into my eyes, 
I'm vulnerable under your heavy stare, I'm spellbound by the firey lust set firmly into your ridged features, 
I'm tempted to get a taste of what lies underneath that heated gaze. 
Fighting my throbbing body, I smile and dance away
Katlyn Orthman Nov 2012
The cordior is silent
Not a scream to echo off the bare walls
Wet dripping feet
Hang , body suspended in the air
I'm observing
From outside the room
Shivering and scared
But stuck there
The room is dark
And there in the middle if the room
Lies a bed
Straps on the side
A door slams behind me
Who's there?
Oh love
Oh love
I see you there
A shiny flower
In your hair
I hear these words sung
Echoing through the now black
Halls
Terrified tears concur my eyes
Don't let it be real
Oh love
Oh love
I see you there
A shiny flower
In your hair
Closer now I begin to panick
Please let me awaken this nightmare
Memories unwanted
Soaked in terror
His face painted on the walls
In my mind
These words haunt me ....
Even in my sleep
Oh love
Oh love
I see you there
A shiny flower
In your hair
I'm ****** from my feet
Pushed to the bed
Strapped
I scream
Please let me go
Please!
I'm choking on my tears
I'm so scared
I can taste the ***** in my mouth
Let me awaken
Let me awaken
Yet another disturbing nightmare that leaves me troubled
957 · Feb 2014
Storms Heart
Katlyn Orthman Feb 2014
Storms heart lays not in destruction
But at the point of despair it tears it down
To become whole
And rebuild our already shattered lives
Storms heart acts not in hate
But in pain of our cries of despair
The storm cries with us
Feels our pain
The roaring winds are our echoed screams
The pouring rain is our tears
The raging thunder is our anger
The twisting coiling winds
Colliding with the earth
Is our sorrow our love, our hate,
The storms heart is our heart
Together we destroy
We rebuild
Together we are a raging storm
One of the first poems I ever wrote and uploaded onto hellopoetry
Katlyn Orthman Dec 2012
Alone the room spun
The days war had been won
And though I wished to shed my tears
A princess may never show proof of her fears

Many times I've blundered
Beneath storms thunder
But I'd give my life to the kingdom
To regain their freedom

My arms tied, I'd given up love
My eyes closed, I gave my heart a shove
But a trickster popped in
And gave my world a spin

It was a triangle of death, the valley of hell
Because to which one I loved I couldn't tell
My heart belonged in the hands of a friend
We'd soon be wed, though our love was pretend

The queen would soon lose her throne
And I'd remain , all alone
With a crown to rule upon my head
My mother... Would be dead

Her powers killed her slowly she was thirty nine
Lucky that wouldn't happen with mine
Scolded by the glares of my kin
I wondered when the peace would begin
I wrote this poem after reading two books in a series the first called switched and the second called torn by Amanda Hocking, I love this series so far and I can't wait to read the third book, I definitely recommend the series
955 · Aug 2012
Let's become greatness
Katlyn Orthman Aug 2012
I have doubt,
But you always believe in me,
You have doubt,
But I push you forward,
I begin to fall,
But you hold me up,
You begin to lose faith,
But I give you hope,
Together we can become great,
Seperate we might just throw it away,
We can explore the depths of our art,
We can push each other to extend our minds ,
So lets become greatness,
And leave our doubt behind
953 · Oct 2012
Silent Killer
Katlyn Orthman Oct 2012
The owl perched high
Traumatizing skies
Little feet tap the ground

Spotted by sharp eyes
Little mouse cries
Owl dips low with no sound

All goes back to normal
Silent killer
Perched again
952 · Jan 2014
Engulfed in the Flames
Katlyn Orthman Jan 2014
My blood runs across my flesh
He's here again
here to take me away.

The halls are dark,
and the moon washes in pale light across the floor
My tears don't fall this time,
I am not afraid.

His black wings caress the plush white carpet
stained by my life essence,
and his eyes are filled with such hate
and the blood of his innocent victims
the candles on the window pane burst to life
and the wind whispers across my damp skin.

I raise my shaking hand towards him
begging for him to end the pain,
as crimson liquid spills from my severed veins
they hit the ground and turn to black.

His eyes watch me in curiosity
but his lips curl in a knowing grin
he lifts one hand and shakes one long bony finger,

"You have one chance little one," he whispers

But I've gone too far to look back
I turn to the window,
and watch the white curtains billowing in the icy wind.

"I'm ready," I whisper.

The white curtains touch the tips of the flame
and roar into a hungry sea of fire

"There is no forgiveness once you cross the line,"

I stare at the flames as they bend and flicker
as if they're dancing
taunting me.

My mind was already made.

"There has never been forgiveness for me, my soul belongs to you,"

And as soon as the last word drops from the tip of my tongue
I'm engulfed in the flames.
Katlyn Orthman Feb 2014
I'm afraid to shut my eyes,
I'm terrified I'll see you there
in my dreams
again

I want so bad to tell my mom
why I want to stay up late
I want so bad to confess to her
the reason I hardly ate

I want to cry
and tell her whats wrong
but I've held it all in
for so long

I'm praying, I am actually praying
if anyone will listen
take this from me
take it off of my chest

because **** it
I'm doing my best
I keep thinking
that I don't deserve this

To be haunted
by a monster
that takes and takes and takes
and walks freely
unaware or maybe just uncaring of
the mess that he makes

Please
I just want to sleep
if it's not to much to ask
let my dreams be mine to keep
948 · Oct 2012
Stars
Katlyn Orthman Oct 2012
Dark sky
Full moon above the tree tops
On the small hill before my building
And bordered by the enpty woods
I'm looking deep into the night skies
Thousands of twinkling eyes
Shooting star above my head
Big dipper leaning against the dark navy blue
And the owl and the crickets sing
Katlyn Orthman Oct 2012
Eyes of blue oceans
Hair of blonde silk
She fell because she was broken
She couldn't make up her mind
And she was running out of time
The pressure on her shoulders
Pushed her through that hole
It was An escape from her reality
To another
The rabbit chased the wind
While she shouted to him
She was lost in a world that
Couldn't be real
But her fingertips defied
Solid and warm
The trees bark seemed to breath
Everything there was alive
In the corner of her eye little eyes look
At her curiosity, yet unease
Is she the one?
Little voice squeaks
Be quite she'll hear you!
Another one
What could this strange place be
The trees were taller than any
The grass and flowers , many
The small rivers and streams all around her
Could this be a dream?
A voice echoes , like it's lost in a cave
But suddenly her body hurts
A scream from her lungs
And suddenly she's flung
And the pursuer yells,
"off with her head !"
I wrote thus thinking about how when life throws you surprises they can seem so awesome and beautiful at first until everything goes wrong, not always the case but most the time , I guess it depends on the persons luck
945 · Nov 2012
Away
Katlyn Orthman Nov 2012
Away with this anger
It serves no purpose
Away with all the catagories
We put each other in
Let's treat each other right
Because we all deserve a chance
To look into the mirror
And feel alright
Away with all the criticism
That we through at each other
For the way we feel
The things that are real
In our lives
Away with all the war
Our fields have drank enough
Blood soaked
Pain drenched
Tainted and stained
Away with all the arguments
They only lead us to unimportant things
Where we push and we shove
And we all fall down
Away with all the assumptions
She belongs with him
And he belongs with her
Everyone deserves to love
Everyone deserves their rights to love
No matter who the loved one is
Away with all the pain
Away with the strains
We live through
Away
943 · Aug 2013
Starlight Serenade
Katlyn Orthman Aug 2013
The leaves fall,
drifting to the ground
The shadows impend,
embrace and surround

Empty eyes,
staring back at me
I see my reflection,
it's mocking me

It's cold in here,
let me out
I won't run,
erase your doubt

Please,
these chians do weigh
They tether my heart,
so I must stay

I just want to see the light,
glowing orbs in the sky
I just want to feel the stars,
inside my skin tonight

This starlight serenade,
wraps me in its trance
I feel it taking over me,
It forces me to dance

Oh moonlight lover,
so high within the sea of blue
Take these chains from me,
so I may dance with you
938 · Aug 2012
Anger
Katlyn Orthman Aug 2012
Boiling Deep inside me, 
My rage turning and twisting me at its will, 
Her words sting me, 
She scolds me for who I am, 
She can't accept me, 
My rage slows down,
The burn simmers and I realize I'm hurt, my eyes fill with betraying tears, 
Why am I never good enough? 
Why must I work so hard everyday to impress her? 
Doesn't she understand I feel pain just like her? 
Does she not understand that a piece of me breaks away from myself everytime she criticizes me? 
But I won't ever tell her this, I keep my thoughts to myself shes all that I  have left, 
So I lift my sweatshirt hood and hide the dying girl, 
I put my headphones in and drowned out her jabs, 
Swallow away the lump in my throat and remind myself four more years and I can be free of this suffocating  net, 
But I still love her, and she tries to love me,
937 · Oct 2012
Empty shell
Katlyn Orthman Oct 2012
A choir sings behind me
Collapsed on the floor
My heart beat once more
My hand outstretched
For a prince that never came
For a hero that never saved the day
Crashing at a million miles per hour
Towards a bottomless pit
****** away, chewed up then spit,
Nothing more than a residue
Left over
A mere mark
Of what might've existed
A wasted prayer
Among the mass
One teacher
Of an uncaring class
Fog on glass
Wiped away
Night to the sun
A passed day
Nothing more
Everything less
Left as an empty shell
I'm alone again
Without your touch
I'm not much
My heart ....
There is no beat
My finger tips to the stars....
They do not meet
My time is up
I'll say goodbye
With tears in my eyes
And pain wedging my throat
I leave tonight ..... On the lowest note
934 · Sep 2012
At peace
Katlyn Orthman Sep 2012
Even though I'm hopeless
I try to keep on
But then everywhere I look
Tragedy strikes
Kills me a little more
I'm fighting not to cry
I'm fighting to look strong
But truth is I've died
I'm numb
Cold
Struggle to breath
I just need to cry
I need to let out this knocking pain
It's like an ocean
Drownding me
In my sorrows
Im alone with my misery
Take my hand
Bring me to the afterlife
It might be nice
I can breath in fresh air
Without their cryptic stare
I will be at rest
At peace
931 · Aug 2016
Shades of Madness
Katlyn Orthman Aug 2016
I
Feel Nothing
Inside My Heart

It
Deceives Me
Again

Breaking Me
So Easy I Bend

Leaving Me
Right Back At The Start
Of It All

This Madness I Hide

It's Swirling

Dancing

Crying Inside

Save Me

From


Myself
926 · Nov 2012
Cut away the pain
Katlyn Orthman Nov 2012
Welling inside
Facing mirrors
Surronded , no way to hide
Cold like the winter
I'm laying there
The white snow is stained
Red
By my blood
My tears freeze on my face
My vision becoming fuzzy
No one will miss me...
The trees are spinning above my head
If only the clouds above me could hold me
The blade against my skin
Had torn away from me
My emotions
I had bled
I had cried
Alone with myself
I can't lift my head
But I'm aware of the soft fluffy
Snowflakes falling new
Landing around me
Nature calling me to join
Nature asking for me to take away the pain
To stop my struggles
My heart beats in my chest
Heaving labored beats
I just need a little push
To go falling through the black
Open sky
Plummeting to the ground
Breaking through the empty sound
It's okay
They whisper
Nobodies around
I'm scared but I use my last bit
Of strength
To bring the blade
To my throat
I sob now
But I drag the blade across my throat
Anyways
The pain envolopes me
So wholely
Pulls me from reality
Into the dark
And then I'm falling
Through the endless sky
924 · Feb 2015
My Mind Is My Prison
Katlyn Orthman Feb 2015
Click Clack
Click Clack
My throat is burning
My skin is dry; barely clinging to my bones
My eyes are glued shut by exhaustion
But I know I should open them
Click Clack
The rough surface of the floor beneath me
Scrapes my fragile skin
Help me
Click Clack
With the rest of the strength I harbor inside me
I open my eyes
Click Clack
A dim light looming above me, flickers as it swings side to side
The only source of light
The only source of hope
Click Clack
Time eludes me
There are no windows in my prison
Click Clack
No, there is only Time and Pain
My two closest friends
Click Clack
Exhaustion sweeps over my protesting body once again
And my eyes drape in defeat
My muscles sag their heads in despair
And my bones creak as they settle back into place
Click Clack
My mind flickers into a dream
Where I live vicariously through my inner self
Click Clack*
It's safer this way.
923 · Oct 2012
Blood lyrics
Katlyn Orthman Oct 2012
My heart bleeds the lyrics 
You once sang in my ear 
And my eyes are dry 
Except for one last tear 
That seems to move slow 
And I can't speak these words 
But I know that you know 
That, that last silent kiss 
Was goodbye 
Even though I feel as if i've died 
I'm letting go of the fights 
I'm going home tonight 
Heartbeats will go on 
Even though mine used to skip one 
For you 
Because you used to hold me 
In your warm embrace 
My heart would then race 
Rest assured 
My broken heart wont be cured 
I was lured into your trap 
And you weren't afraid to snap 
Down on me 
And now I must leave 
From this pain 
That has since strained 
My life
920 · Sep 2012
Four paws and freedom
Katlyn Orthman Sep 2012
I was aware in the strangest way,
For paws, bright eyes,
But no words to say,
Knowledge replaced by instinct,
Tame replaced by wild,
I was a beast,
No longer a child,
But I wasn't afraid,
Just so confused,
If this was dreams joke,
It must be amused,
But this felt so real,
And so natural,
The need to run with my freedom,
Clinched in my bones,
I wanted to feel my feet,
Hit the grass and the stones,
I wanted to ****** my head back,
And let out a roar,
This was freedom,
I could not ignore,
918 · Sep 2012
Evils near
Katlyn Orthman Sep 2012
Snow flakes falling in the abyss
Cold antic whispers of sin
The frozen trail deaths finger tips leave across your soul
Mendacious eyes in the dark
A crook of a finger
Leads you farther into the dark
Hand in hand with the beast with wings of the angles
Satans halo warped and bloodied
Stains of the sinners sins on his robe
Evil lays in wake, but slumbers deeply
Hope is running out
Tick of the cracked face clock
The night of an eclipse
Alls dark for a few seconds
****** a few innocents
Corrupt them
Then consume
916 · Apr 2014
The Age Of The Stars
Katlyn Orthman Apr 2014
Our mother, beautifully hovered in the sky
Glowing as our existence grows in her belly
A swirling mass of life and destruction
Exploding into a massive supernova
and giving birth to life

Star children look up at the skies
Where our step mother lies
Asking it grant our wishes
Feasting our eyes upon the beauty
of our distant family
Bathing beneath the gentle touch
of the Sun's embrace
And we know she will be our end

And in the time that the stars die
Life on Earth will cease
and our world will return to black

Leaving The Age of the Stars
as a small fingerprint in history.
910 · Sep 2012
Untitled
Katlyn Orthman Sep 2012
They say we have freedom,
But why do I feel so trapped?
I feel like a prisoner in a mild prison,
I can't understand why people degrade each other for who they are, what they like, who they love,
It's not the world I want to be apart of,
If the things we want the most are war, hate, and rudeness,
I wrote this because of something I saw today
907 · Nov 2012
Ice castles
Katlyn Orthman Nov 2012
Cold beauty
Sing to me
Frosted breath
My lungs carry notes above the mountains
Hold me while we lay  in this bed of snow
Keep me warm so I know
That you will never let me go
In this ice castle we sit
Upon our throne
You the king
And I your queen
We have no gold
No maids to cater to us
No authority over a court
We simply build up riches of love
Your and mine
And combined
We could own the world
Bring forth the wine
Sliding on ice floors
Open doors
Windows high
Believe to touch the sky
Sing a lullaby
Don't let me go
I've suffered enough
My life has been tough
Just keep me warm
And show me love
That would be enough
And my heart would be yours
This is forsure
My king
My king
In this ice castle
My dreams will come true
Without a wish upon a star
Without a wish tossed down a well
You are mine
And I am yours
Because in love
I fell
906 · Feb 2014
Brothers of the Hills
Katlyn Orthman Feb 2014
Clink Clash
The metallic clang of swords colliding
echoes throughout the rolling hills
My brothers lay strewn
across the crimson stained grass

Clink Clash
My chest heaves
as I cut down every man in my path
A Raven soars up above in the skies
watching over my fallen brothers
and taking their souls to the next side

The sun beats down hard
on my bare shoulders
Metal against my flesh
I feel the heat searing into my skin

Fight!*
They yell
To the Death!
They cry

Without a regard or regret
I carry my sword into the enemies heart
With hope that the angels
will greet me in my death

The Raven above swoops low
and shrills out a cry
a sound that resonates
over the hills

And I feel the cold metal
cut through my fragile flesh barrier
and pierce my heart

To my knees
I drop
with my head raised to the sky
I cry out

Just remember us
I whisper softly
900 · Nov 2012
Snowfalls
Katlyn Orthman Nov 2012
Stars around a bright moon
The bite in the air tells me
Winters here..
The old friend I miss on summer days
The forget when I'm lacking sun rays
The pure white of the snow
Sings to me
I remember ...
The swing set
All the kids laughing
But I just swing to my heart beat
Back then forth
Cold wind splashing my face
Thinking thinking
Always thinking
Even as I grew older
I was stuck in my own mind
With simply my thoughts
Always thinking
Always analyzing
And though it is a gift
It is also a curse
Haunting me
Making me see things I rather not see
Making me believe
Does happiness make knowledge ?
One could never say
Because for something's
I'd rather not see
I'd rather not believe
I'd rather not know
Could darkness leave room to smile?
Or would I just be blinded and lost?
Or is the light the right place to be?
I can't know the answer!
I've spent night day
Day and night
Thinking , analyzing, searching!
For some piece of evidence
But none exist for my eyes too look upon
Heartless with a mind!
Or mindless with a heart?
I could never say
It quarrels  with me  
I get within
895 · Sep 2012
Hurt beyond words
Katlyn Orthman Sep 2012
Chocking on my tears 
Wish I could die 
I hate my life 
Blood on my arm 
Pain tingles down 
I can't keep back these tears 
I wish I could leave 
She hates me 
She's so mean 
No matter what I do 
She shoves me away 
I wish this was my last day 
Can't stand this anymore 
I've shut the final door 
Im taking this leap
No one will miss me 
No one will look 
They won't read my book 
My stories to long 
They wont sing my song 
The world doesn't need me 
I should just leave 
Maybe god will accept me 
I doubt it 
No one loves me 
I'm a pity 
Stupid 
Ugly 
Worthless 
All her words 
She doesn't care
Sorry this one is so dark but I was soo angry I needed to unload it all,
895 · Nov 2012
Blue rose
Katlyn Orthman Nov 2012
Blue rose
Deliver love to me
Deliver prosperity
I just need a sense of accomplishment
I've been trying to swim in cement
Stuck
But still trying
Bring me love
So I can feel whole again
Fix my heart
I'm tired of being apart
On the floor
Forgotten
Pull me up by my heart strings
Give me a melody to sing
I just need a reason
To raise my head
And feel
Fed
By


Loves passionate touch
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