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  Jan 2015 Jan Harak
ARI
The sound of her breathing
Had faded away
As did the sound
Of her weary heart beating

Eyelids laid heavy
Against lifeless cheeks
So many mouths around her
Not one dared to speak

Her hands felt foreign
Too cold; too blue
Daddy softly whispered
"God say it's not true"

At 16 he should be teaching
Her exactly how to drive
Grasping his seatbelt
Praying for dear life

Instead he's left staring
At her name carved in stone
It's proof that his precious girl
Is never coming home

So he cries upon the earth
Where his daughter lies
Swallowed by the pain a parent
Feels when their child dies

He cries for all the years
She will never live
For all the tender love
She will never know or give

He cries for all the memories
She will never get to make
For her picture on his nightstand
His heart a constant ache

He cries for his little girl
Who will never have the chance to be
The beautiful young lady
Who turned 17.

-ARI
  Jan 2015 Jan Harak
ARI
If I took your hand
And wrapped your arm around my waist,
Would you pull me close
Or push me away?

If I smiled at you
And asked for one dance,
Would you leave me alone
Or give me a chance?

-ARI
  Jan 2015 Jan Harak
Sana
What it is
And what is not
Is what it is
And what is not
Can you be both?
Can you be none?
Can you be all?
Can you be not?
-
¿nʇ sǝ ןǝnb ǝן
¿nʇ sǝ ןǝnbǝן
sɐd ʇsǝ,u ınb sıɐɯ
ʇsǝ ınb ǝɹʇê un
ǝɯâ ǝun ʇǝ
sdɹoɔ un ǝɹʇuǝ
ǝuuosɹǝd ʇǝ snoʇ ǝɹʇuǝ
uǝıɹ un ʇǝ ʇnoʇ un ǝɹʇuǝ
Sana trying to be all philosophical
Jan Harak Jan 2015
Darkness has come
as I feared
and it hides
all the stars from me

I am looking out
the window
and I try
to reach you

No response
you are gone
and I know
life goes on

To my star out there
in the darkness of night
I am still here
call me if you want
  Jan 2015 Jan Harak
Almost Lover
She looked at me, and said
"Inside I am so lonely, and dead"
Her blue eyes, the same as mine
Both of our lips, desperate for a smile
Hands are shaking, we both know
Our hands, are the lonely one's not meant to hold.

We stared at each other
Longing to connect
We both know, there is no meeting in the middle
"Last year really done me in" she said
"Now there are more days I wish I were dead".

"Oh dear soul, I've really lost my place"
Her hand, my hand touching
Cold like glass
We both pull back, alone again.

"We are not friends"! She screamed
This is not what it seems
It would be wrong of me to stay
We break the mirror, and walk away.
  Jan 2015 Jan Harak
Almost Lover
I know you have ***** blonde hair, and blue/green eyes just like mine.
I know you had these big ol' ears, just like mine
I don't know what you sound like, or what  your laugh brings to a place
I don't know the love you hold for me, because you have died.

If I ever got to hold your hand, I don't recall
If I ever got to hug you,
I don't know I just look at these picture that do nothing at all
Just a constant reminder, you somehow existed, but I don't recall.

From what I hear you loved me From what I hear you needed me From what I hear I was your whole world but you never were  mine. Pictures just show me , somehow this was all true
but I never heard you laugh not ever, not once Maybe I did,
and I just don't know Maybe we laughed together, I don't recall.

Everyone tells me the stories about you,
and they are hard to believe It is hard to believe you were real, something in my life actually perfect Something perfect,
but I never got to see, but you going away is the easiest thing to believe.

When I make a mistake I stand alone I take a look around,
but I know you have already been gone for so long
Sometimes I secretly cry, because I need you to tell me what to do
and maybe I carry a grudge against God, for taking you
for leaving me here to fight all alone
For never having a place to really call home.

No opening Christmas gifts in front of the fire place
No letting you watch me blow out my birthday candles
No teaching me how to ride a bike
No, nothing at all, maybe you were just a figment of their imagination a reason to make me keep wondering what could of been
To keep a girl living in the past, to make a girl sin.

I guess I will never know, because all these wishes,
and all these prayers they have never showed me
if you were ever really there
and I get tired of the stories, and tired of the pictures,
tired of the father fairytale
Because I never became a princess, and you were never even there.
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