Love is the urge to **** yourself
It’s the immediate feeling of self-doubt, self-hate, and self harm when you think of how you hurt the one you love
I know the feeling all too well, because. I hurt the one I love, in a way I can’t undo. And everyday I regret it, and feel the pain of it.
I feel the pain often, especially when the one I love is upset, because no matter what I go through, they’re going through something worse.
The one they love, betrayed them.
Belittled them
Made them feel inferior to one they never felt inferior to
And that’s my fault
Not anyone else's
Mine.
I’m not asking for pity
I’m not asking for excuses
I’m asking for forgiveness
And I think that’s selfish.
Me wanting it to go away is selfish in my own eyes
My mistake will live with me throughout my life
I won’t lose it, no matter how much I run.
Some days I think if I just stop running, and fade, it’ll all go away
And I’m right
It would.
Love is the urge to **** yourself

And while beauty may be in the eye of the beholder, not even you can deny that she shines with a radiance that makes the shining stars in the night sky pale in comparison.

But now we can communicate.
I am not sure what cause this sort of block.
Under normal circumstances I suppose it's human.
To access so much of ourselves mentally.
Yet physically remain mute.
An attempt to be funny. Charismatic.
To yearn the manifestation of being represented such as a memory.
For some it's easy. It becomes culture.
Ignoring this association of fear.
Although slight. We begin to judge ourselves.
In fight beyond a couple of seconds that leads to bliss.
The things that have yet developed.
The possibility that things may not.
But definitely something is there. Reflected from the light of eyes.
Self doubt in light of holding back.
Yet we've evolved.
We've evolved into a splitting image of what we adorn.
The critique of what eyes see & what ears have heard.
We've thought in different ways of what binds.
Now we communicate.
To better service our needs, our wants.
We've binged them all.
Knowing all of our favorite parts, to speak hesitantly about the bad.
We recite them only in private.
Ignoring the kick backs and *** lucks that begin with pleasure.
It begins with the closed culture of what feels foreign
to no longer recite in mental.
Now we communicate

I can feel anxiety crawling into my mind, feeding me with unnecessary thoughts.
Self-doubt reaches out for my soul; fear smiles at me as I quivered my lips.
My trembling hands strike down on the concrete, and my head spins.
I slowly shut my eyes, hoping my demons would leave me.
But they persist, making me feel like I have to plea for peace.

I grasp my reality behind a mirror and watch the clock unwind.
I hear the faded children laugh, it echoes through my mind, and I feel the fear within my heart.
I wish my thoughts were sane, so they didn't fall like rain.

When I look ahead of the storm, I see a generation full of demons.
Darkness may rule the world, but I kept holding on.
With every battle I withstand, I fear the shadows will bind my heart and take my breath away.
But somehow, my spirit will never give in.
-Niko

I don't care who you are, if you judge people for a living then I recommend that you take a long good look at your life because if you are taking that time out of your life to criticize other people for being someone that they want to be then you need to fix yourself. Fix your mind set. Fix the way you see the world because who ever taught you that being yourself is wrong did not teach you right. I will not judge you for wanting to be a different gender. I will not judge you for your beliefs and religions. I will not judge you for the clothes you wear or the music you listen too so why the **** should you be able to judge me? I as so sick of being looked at and automatically labeled. If I wanted to be labeled then I would label myself.