Think it's time to finish this story
Time to tell what has haunted me inside
Of 27 years of suffering
Staring back at another man inside
You've scared me for so long
I no longer want to run and hide
My reflection is what truly
Makes me terrified
I've asked myself questions
Since I was little, I've always asked why?
How can a man not love something
That's half of him and deny
The fact that pain will and forever
Last in this little boy's lies
Saying he's okay
When inside he's dark and so distant
Amongst so many people who love him
But his whole life he's felt so different
Wanting to just grow...
But the idea of you causes his resistance
He's never just came out and said it
What was wrong with me that you did so much wrong!?
Why couldn't I be proud of who I was!?
Why did you let me see what you did to mom?
Do you know what you've done?
Can you understand what you put me through?
Mind hasn't been the same
Since dealing and learning about you
Hatred turned my heart
So dark and so full of pain
My life has been confusing
At times I feel like my mind is insane
I won't ever stop asking
The question of "why am I half of you?"
I understand I took the qualities
That makes me nothing like you
But my cheeks soak my tears still
And I get these moments where I feel I can't hold on
I thank those men in my life
Who helped replace you and keep me so strong
But there is a scar that I...know will never heal
I know that life teaches you how
To make better from the cards that he deals
So for the first time in my life
I forgive you!
Please let me move on!
You've taken so much from us
But mommy and I are too strong
We've gained peace of mind now
And clarity has finally found our hearts
This piece is just for me to tell you
I'm not son and we're so far apart
I've brought joy to the people
Who love me and see me for myself
I've grown into a man
Who guides those who may need that help
I've become the person you weren't
And the man I'm proud to be...
A part of me will always wonder...
What was it that was wrong with me?
You'll never understand the...
Moments That I've grown from your misery
The first key is acceptance
Then I've learned to love my reflection
A little boy crying out loud
A man who brings him protection
So dear father I...
I wanna tell you this as the truth
Anyone can be a father but just being a dad is something you couldn't even do
Your name has haunted me
It's brought blood straight to my eyes
Your ways have brought to my heart
27 years of living a lie
I'm freezing my soul now
And getting past what I never thought I could do
Mommy told me this and I believe it now
I'm not a single part of you.
So dear bland Simpkins you better hear me
Listen to every word that I say
This piece has allowed me to officially be free now
My honesty has finally pushed you away
Thank you for teaching me
Lessons that will help propel my life
Who I'm becoming is a blessing
And I'm doing all I can right
So the man in the mirror I shatter your reflection
I smile and tell you this eye to eye
Thank you for everything
Thank you for showing me how to never be that kind of guy
Dear father, dear dad, dear donor
This is my freedom - this is my final piece - this is forever...goodbye.

(Please never comeback - I'm free now)

So many times of misplacment
So many hearts in replacement
Why is love becoming abrasive?
Oh how could you just...
Sit on the other side and stare at your phone?
okay with the feeling of being and living alone..
Collecting their hearts this behavior I cannot condone, yeah
Did you ever see me?
Has my soul taken full transparency?
Talk to me - ask me where it is my mind has gone...
Tell me I'm right for believing in all of your wrong,
Feel my pain as the pen bleeds in this song
You, no longer want me
No longer love me I....

(Beats drops dramatically)

I can't feel nothing, my body is numbing
Searching for you, why can't I see something?
Looking for words
blank thoughts remain
It's the woman who suffers the most in this game.
Turn the tables - swallow the meal that you've made
Stick a fork in her heart and cut her right through her veins.
Yeah,
Swim in her mind, all her memories reside
Stop watching em drown, stop watching em die...

yeah... (Echos out)

Mhmm please come save me, while you still have time!
Why must they leave when you're running on your lifeline...
I - I don't understand, I...don't (crying) understand...

(She looks up - wipes her tears and anger comes)

Moment after moment
I've allowed Cupid to control this
(Control this)
Yeah, control this
It's my turn to finally show this
You cheated on me, but I'm depressed
I refuse, I refuse
To allow another man to get me upset
I need to be strong, I need to move on
A queen never lets a prince do her wrong
You cut and you ripped
You hurt me like this
But I build and I grow and I'll
(Learn from this)
Repressed and refreshed
Make - up smeared - I'm a mess
Let me clean up myself and show the world
(How I do this)
You can take back your kisses
Gifts, and false - fake wishes
I'm better than ever and you're the last thing I'm missing.
Bet you thought this was about you...
You know it was about you
Bet you thought I would fall and crash
Bet you thought I couldn't make it with you...
Bet you this, bet you that
Those memories are deleted, all those words taken back.
You smiled at my tears, but guess who'll get the last laugh?
You claimed to be a man and sit high on your thrown
Well, I've yet to see a king and a person who's grown
And let me tell you one thing, you couldn't break me if you tried
We women grow from the pain and build from what lies.

Okay, so you just...
Go around breaking hearts just to see what's inside?
Your mother left you so you can't read a woman's eyes?
Listen to your other side, put down your pride
Did you ever think that - I'd need that?
To stay alive...

Promises are lies...
You listen with a hopeful mind
"Maybe it'll be different this time..."
That silence inside
The rips in your soul
The bad habits of a "good thing" that never seem to get old,
Use your feet - go ahead and be so bold
Walk away, your story still remains untold...
But It is so cold...
...

I - loved you with purity and sensual affection,
Too much to ask the man of my dreams to free me from my nightmares of never being selected...
First, in the eyes of the one who carried my heart...Second to the woman to who he paid more attention that...Third time could of been a charm but...the Fourth coming didn't seem to send love to the right spots, honesty in the right message.

What does this darkness bring?
Lost intuition, burnt pictures.
Filled up bottles of wining, that collected all of the tears that I sing.
Wading in the emotions
Drowning in this moment
Staring back at my lying King.
A broken bond that reflects on the floor of a fallen ring...
Because if you don't learn - you will never know...
You'll never know a good thing.

See I'm so self destructive
Hurt anyone one that comes near
Love is still one of my fears
Gathered up so many tears
Told myself I would change
And I started to grow
Feel like this time around, I'm not the one who's at fault
How can you be so in love? Then suddenly become distant strangers
To mend a heart is so much trouble
That's broken, torn and mangled
I swore that things would be different
You and I in a position
I tried to get you to talk
Impossible for you to listen
The writing all on the walls
Break up hyroglifics
Two people who've become distant
A lot of pushing and resistance
Our souls didn't mesh well - why do we keep trying to mix it?
I'm walking away
You're screaming out loud
No one wants to say sorry because their pride is too proud
How come it never worked out?
We will probably never know why...
But you can't heal what was ready to die.

(Hook)

You deepen more of my sickness
Just stared at me like a witness
You stretched out my demons
Put me through hell's fitness
I swore you were the cure
I finally healed when you left
Could never breath around you
I finally caught my breath.
I'm not opposed to love  
I'm opposed to deception
But what I've learned in this life
The last one is your most valuable lesson
You can learn from the past
Or get stuck and stay lost
Too many fish in the sea to not reel up and re toss
These days I'm slowly overthinking
At times you may cross my mind
How come it never worked out?
We will probably never know why...
But you can't heal what was ready to die.

(Hook)

I thank you for showing me something
That I didn't see back then
Don't need a response from you
Don't care to even be friends
I'm just liberating my mind, finally releasing my heart
Having full faith in myself and let time play its part
You've turned me into a brother - mama said she has a better son
Sometimes we forget to see all the good
that comes out of each outcome.
I found purity in someone else
I promise not to push her away
Because unlike the past
She sees a future with me
Learned to swallow my pride
Stop looking back at my mistakes
Realize it wasn't truly love
Just two people who made a mistake
But I can't help to wonder...
Always be a feeling inside...
How come it never worked?
We will probably never know why...
But you can't heal what was ready to die

~¥€€¥~

Yeah,
I've kept quite and figured the pen ran outta ink
The message wasn't too clear and these days it's been hard to just sit down and think
Let me stop for a min and take you back to where it all started
Half the people I grew up with are non existent- but all them departed
I get on this and self proclaim myself the realist and smartest
Thinking outside of the box but boxed in my own words
Keeping my talents to a minimum and remain so modest.
They gon run they mouth before they ever talk to you
Saying a whole lotta nothing's, thinking they logic is the truth
Feel like I never say much but there is a lot to know
Feel like the difference between us is really starting to show
I've stepped away from my heart and suddenly forgot the meaning  
Forgot that feeling of being a young man - fearless and optimistically dreaming
I'm not saying I'm back im just saying the pen is lit so you better keep caution
Or I'll let it all leak out like its blood comin out the faucet
With slick metaphors and play on words that don't really play
Subliminal bullets with SHH names that I  shouldn't say
The reigning king you'd swear I'm bringing victory back to Cleveland
Celebrating with my team and all the people who never stopped believin
I've stopped thinking about what they thinking about and watched my success finally rise
You can glare at him all you want but can't take the determination outta this poor child's eyes
The hit came outta no where
You know the haters don't like the art of surprise
Their whispers are the inspiration
We grow from their doubt and constant congratulatory lies
Shake your hand - saying they feeling you but quick to stab your back
Look out deeper in the woods, snakes are everywhere and not just in the grass
I lost a step but gained two more, hop scotched over what they didn't know I could do
Tired of talking past pain, my father and most of all about you
Progression doesn't start unless you finally start to rev your engine
That green light come on and your drive should push you to that happy ending
If you don't lose sleep thinking about your dreams you ain't truly dreaming
If you ain't cry a few times while working you ain't really putting in a meaning
If you have the same amount of people in your circle when it's all said it done...
You ain't truly make it
If you never folded once under the pressure
Your point never truly hit breaking
This the formula that shows the good from great
She says she loves you but how much of that love can she truly take?
Money don't buy happiness and that logic remains truthful
But the change from the change still helps keep one's life fruitful.  Crazy.
But this concludes the ending of Dougie Simps and simply forgetting what it meant to let the pen do his talking
I've run out ink - the blood all over my hands now. Imma see ya when I see ya. (He turns slowly...and continues walking -away.)
- I'm Gone

How do you convince a broken heart that it's completely beautiful?
-Dougie Simps

Light up the medicine to help heal the minds core
Drink up no worries until you don't feel the pain anymore
This ain't addiction
This is conviction
Trying to prove my point to the old and ignorant
But what's the point in such a dull time
Me speaking my mind is probably a federal crime
Allow the vice to loosen up as I raise the price of my forbidden confidence
To say what's on my mind all while dealing with the consequence
Half man and half dead that shuffles through
Feeling alive on a cloud but probably looking dead to you
Hm
Don't take these words for granted
The weak and simple minded will look at them hella slanted
I'm feeling great
Food for thought all stacked on my plate
I see the stars align, old heros who were once great
Imagine if I could pick apart their brains,
I bet we would've relate

Hungry for power - should be hungry for knowledge, like what book can I devour?
Old girls still acting all sour
Claiming I'm not doing ****t
I'm doing everything but you, she just can't cope with it
But back to program back to these Jordan's
Back to the money and back to the slow jams
Nah
Increase my value to issue out more than materialistic value
And see the battle in which my heart, mind, soul all decided to scatter
My heart was beating for certain meaning that my mind couldn't quite understand
And my soul was tired of both of them trying to manipulate the decision of being a certain type of man
Did you struggle?
And feel the faithless wonder disappear?
Praying to god but the devil is constantly whispering all in your ear
Hearing voices, making bad choices but it all apart of growing up.
No one dies a ****** because at some point we all gave a f$@k
High as the alps, lost in my thoughts
Found in my prayers
Wondered if I fell down, who would be there?
Wondering if I have my heart, who else willing to share?
Wondering if I died tomorrow, who would truly care?
Questions we all ask, while trying to complete the task. Are you truly living your life? Are you afraid the good times won't last?
Are you happy right where you are? Don't look at me like that.
You haven't asked yourself these questions until the last time it all went bad...
I bring the realization to life and call you out on your problems
You keep responding with "a new day same ****t" but continue to never solve em.
People these days lack evolution
Settling the new trend - life is the real movie and all ya playing pretend.
I'm playing a role to
And it's called contradiction...
I've yet to try change but expect everyone else to listen?
These words - yes, yes these words are to be nothing more but understood
Turn life into your own - make life what you should.