Dev A

Dev A Sep 2018

She stands on the side of the lake
Watching the water caress the reflections on the surface
The glittering shine of the moon and stars
In the endless depths of water

She stands there thinking
I loved you with everything I had
I could have been by your side
I gave you all that I am

She stands with her head to the sky
With the water kissing her feet
As she asks the moon
Why wasn’t I enough?

She stands on the edge
As the winds play with her hair
Wondering and thinking of all that was
Waiting for an answer from the ethereal goddess above

#love #moon #relationship #broken #sad #end

Dev A Sep 2018

My First Love (Found Again)

When I was a young girl
I fell in love for the first time.
It started out as a hate
But slowly grew into something more.

When I was a teenager
My love was the only thing there for me.
It was my solace
But was slowly turned against me.

When I was in my late teens
My love left me for the first time.
It was on again and off again
But then it completely disappeared.

When I was a young girl
I fell in love for the first time.
But it wasn’t with a person
It was with words.

When I was a teenager
My love was the only thing there for me.
My friends left and I was alone
But I always had my words.

When I was in my late teens
My love left me for the first time.
The depression got me
It stole my words from me.

A few days ago
I fell in love again.
My words found a way back to me
And the pages flew beneath my fingertips.

A few days ago
I fell in love again.
There was a light in the darkness
And it ripped its way forth
Reminding me of what we once had.

When I was a young girl
I fell in love for the first time.
A few days ago
I fell in love again.

It started out as a hate
But slowly grew into something more.
My words found a way back to me
And the pages flew beneath my fingertips.

#depression #dark #light #love #writing #words #poetry #fight #happiness #happy

Dev A May 2018

Demons of Night

In the darkness of night
I wonder if it’s all worth it.
The thoughts pounding in my head
Am I worth it?
Wouldn’t it be better if I was gone?
I’ll never amount to anything

In the darkness of night
I wonder why I’m still here.
Nothing to look forward to
Where’s the motivation to keep going?
What is there to live for?
I have nothing keeping me here

In the darkness of night
I wonder if anyone would care.
Friendless
Never making lasting impressions
When has anyone put me first?
No one listens to what I have to say

In the darkness of night
I wonder if it’s the oppressing stillness.
Or are the demons whispering in my ear?
Some say it’s just a chemical imbalance
But in the silence, they come from inside
Whispers of never being enough

#depression #life #end #suicidalthoughts #sucide #darkness #night #demons

Dev A May 2018

The Woman (Mother's Day)

To the woman who is my best friend
Who has always had my back
Even when we don’t get along;

To the woman who always knows what I need
Who is always by my side
Through the good times and the bad;

To the woman who will never let me down
Who fights for me
Because what’s best for me is what’s best for her;

To the woman who shows me how to live right
Who showed me what the world has to offer
And that all I have to do is make it mine;

To the woman who brought me into this world
Who taught me right from wrong
Always having more to show the world;

To the woman who is my mother
Who personifies all that comes with that word
Loving, caring, kind, beautiful, teacher, and everything else;

Happy Mother’s Day
I Love You and would never change what we’ve gone through
You’ve made me into who I am today

#mother #friend #love #happy #life #beautiful

Dev A Mar 2018

A Dream

I dream about you in my sleep
I clutch your hand holding mine,
As your arms wrap me in a tight embrace.

I dream about you in my sleep
I hear your whispered words in my ear
As your lips lay kisses across my cheek.

I dream about you in my sleep
I feel safe in your presence
As you stand by my side.

I dream about you in my sleep
But when I wake I can’t see your face
As I realize a dream was all it was.

I dream about you in my sleep
But when I wake I remember you were a faceless entity
An imaginary lover of a long forgotten time

#love #dream #relationship #lover #imaginary

Dev A Mar 2018

Sounds of the Night

A midnight flower dances in the moonlight;

An owl soars through starlit clouds;

Glistening dewdrops sparkle in the shadows;

Crickets chirp amongst the stillness;

The wind howls through the darkness;

Crinkle of paper as the insomniac turns the pages;

The only sounds which stir in the night.

#insomnia #midnight #darkness #moonlight #night

Dev A Feb 2018

Waiting Day by Day

I sit here waiting day by day
Waiting for a ding, a buzz
Hoping to hear from you.

A simple reassurance I’m on your mind
A ding, or a buzz just you saying “hello”
Just a reminder that you think of me too.

Each time I check my phone
I think I must have missed the ding, or the buzz
The sign that you sent me a message.

As I sit here day by day
Waiting for a ding, a buzz
I see you name cross my screen

A notification sits there with your name
A ding, a buzz alerted me
Telling me you came to say, “Hey! How was your day?”

#relationships #hope #longing #reassurance #hello