When I was four I cried to my mom because I thought that one day, I was going to die.
And at about four o’clock this morning I cried to myself because all I wanted to do was die.

WHY THE **** WOULD YOU PROMISE TO BE MY ROCK IF YOU WERE SO UNSURE OF WHAT YOU WANTED. WHY THE **** WOULD YOU GIVE A BROKEN GIRL YOUR WORD IF YOU’RE ALREADY BROKEN YOURSELF. MAYBE BECAUSE YOU'VE ALWAYS HAD THE LUXURY OF HAVING SOMEONE PICK UP THE ******* PIECES FOR YOU. BUT THE BAND AIDS ARE LOSING THEIR STICK AND I’M RUNNING OUT OF PATIENCE SO IF WE’RE JUST AN AVALANCHE THEN TAKE ME WITH YOU AND MAYBE AT THE BOTTOM OF THIS MOUNTAIN YOU’LL MAKE UP YOUR MIND AND WE CAN PUT BACK THE PIECES TOGETHER.

It's like every night,
I relive September 26.

I'm wasting my money away,
Like its alive and running astray.
My first pay check disappeared,
Before they knew what they feared.
When I'm down and oppressed,
The one way I can still express,
That I'm myself, not any less,
Is to spoil myself with things in excess.
My mother clearly thinks I'm stupid,
That I'm only young and deluded.
And my father, with his selfish sneers,
Expects monetary repayment for a debt of 18 years.
So with their own uneducated impressions,
And their age-induced mindset regressions,
They give in to their control obsessions,
And provoke all my hidden depressions.
And when I can't make use of drugs,
Or feel the pleasure of lustful hugs,
The only thing I've left to do,
The only way to make it through,
Is spend and spend all that I can,
Use all what's left inside my hand,
Prove that all their reprimand,
Has no authority, gives no command.

Yet the only purpose for all this ridiculous strife,
Is to demonstrate that I'm the one who controls my life.

We all live this life like we have many more,
and this one is just an experiment.

Living in a world
Suffering from Empathy Dystrophy
More concerned with their reality shows
And clean windows
While others live in trash
With people throwing away things
Others would **** to have

There's a ringing, ringing in my ears,
You can't hear it, the people don't hear it.
I draw rings, the ringing in my ears.
Dark circles appear under my eyes;
I am so tired from doing nothing.
The lights flash and we don't blink,
Forces clash and we don't blink.
I can't hear what you're not saying,
What you're not praying, proclaiming,
For there's a ringing within my ears.
It drowns out the stars,
It drowns out all fright for
I am so tired from doing nothing.
Peace and retreat drive me mad;
Retreat is not peace, it is pieces.
There's a ringing, ringing in my ears,
You can't hear it, the people don't hear it...

I would ditch the keys
And walk to the end of the Earth.
Dancing along the way,
For the music is only in our heads.
The reflection of hope
And courage in your eyes
Could lead us down this road
To our own special place.
Along the rocks,
Amidst the sunset,
And below the breathtaking moon,
Where nothing else exists
But you and I
And this sad, empty town.

I want to take a road trip
Alone with my music.
And go to every beautiful place
In the world.
I want to see stars in North Dakota
I want to swim in Oregon
I want to get a sunburn in Arizona
I want to listen to music
Experience the gift of the earth
And be whole.

He plastered the words across my face
& permanently wrote them in my mind.
I tried to play off like, I don't mind.
Inside, I'm screaming ... But why?
He only wanted my body, and had forgotten about her face.
Her pure beauty, and her grace.

I want the kind of love
That's quiet

Quiet like tea and a blanket in the morning

I want a love that's soft
That's honest and deep and true
That's always there

Love that's not for show
Or for power
But love simply because love is felt

I want a love that accepts and encourages
I want a love that embodies peace