I think I loved you most the winter your heating was broken
And we’d stay inside all morning
Pretending to complain that we couldn’t get out of bed
Our clothes becoming little islands on the floor,
Ones that we could not quite find the courage to visit

Your hand stayed glued to my hip,
Your breath warming my shoulder
Like a long drag of whiskey
That kind that had a home so far away,
In a glass bottle on top of your refrigerator.
The one that would not be opened
Until that fateful day in February,
When everything went wrong

And on that unbearable night
When you joked that you’d freeze to death if I left you
There was a long silence
Like it might be true.

Now it’s warm enough
That I show too much skin when sitting in bars
And you avoid me like the plague,
Whispering in any girl’s ear that’s near to you
Every time you see me watching out of the corner of your eye

We should have stayed inside when the ice began to melt
Because I think
When those doors opened and we finally ventured outside
The world had changed,
And so had you and I.

When love comes along and touches a heart
It's stay there is permanent and will not depart
But if it appears and then leaves on the morrow
Infatuation has come with all of it's sorrow

He will

Kiss me hard
Touch me where I am scarred
Throw me out
Scream; shout
Remind me I am worthless
Make me wordless
Use
Abuse

But he will

Love me softly
Come home promptly
Take me out
Ask what I am all about
Remind me that he needs me
Compare me to a beautiful sea
Find me when I am afraid
Give me aide

And he will

*Always cry himself to sleep

You have captivated me.
I can feel the ghost of you, holding me tight, making me feel at home.
I dream of you, your flawless face laughing, mine reflecting it.
My thoughts circulate around you & how your ocean eyes hypnotize me.
The phantom of you pulls me in close and tells me sweet nothings.

You have captivated me.
But the real you holds me for only a fraction of a second before you're gone.
My dreams end in nightmare because your holding her instead of me.
My thoughts are struggling to realize the way I look at you will never be returned.
The real you is inconsiderate, a person who cares not about my heart.

And as I ponder all these confusing thoughts, only one truthful thought comes to mind.
I realize that the both of us are in love with someone who will never love us back.

I thought it was you

But it was silver lined clouds
Whisps of hair in the wind
A haze around the moon
And sunshine on my skin
It was the afterglow
That helped me realize
My inner lightness
Without the weight of your lies

You only wear dark clothes when you're sad
now you're wearing black

My hands are the coldest you’ll ever hold
I think my heart is too

I’ll never be big
or small enough to fit in your arms
                                              I always kiss
   the wrong person goodnight

Now ask me how many times you kissed me
then how many times I actually felt something

          Maybe we are just  a lesson that
has gone unlearned
                        Or maybe I just don't know how to end this.

And in that moment I wished for nothing more
Than my lips on yours
And you didnt have a clue.

I'm in love with you
And its hell.
You've set me free
And yet the chains we locked so long ago,
Are dragging me over the coals.