I want to feel how people who know how to love feel. I want their hearts, the fulfillment when they waited so long for someone who never showed but they just cry. Their hearts always hurt but they don't have the heart to hurt others. They know that everything hurts more at night but they stay up late, anyway. They're in the middle of a war but they don't fight. It's torture, that the hands they hold on to are the hands that waved sideways, fading into untouchable air, telling them goodbye. It's hard, that they think every goodbye deserves another hello.
I don't understand. So i just look up to the sky, wishing, that in my next life, i get to be the one who loves-- the one who doesn't live waiting for someone to love her back.

Your will is change
You give life to Your own words
Just hearing them
reading them on the page
speaking them
lifts the veil
to know that there is love
that is beyond measure
but can be seen in sacrifice
in resurrection
in sharing glory with people who didn't love you
You call me worthy, so I am worthy
You love so gently
you don't force it

I want to love You
I do love You
keep showing me how to love
I want your presence close
thick and full
dripping wet
because it is poured over me
undignified
as you made Yourself
I will love You
Boldly
as You declared love
I will declare it
You keep blessing beyond a heavenly seat
what love that You are only a breath away!
I will breathe
inhale the sweet smoke of Your fire
and exhale a windstorm

You affect the way I think
because You softened my heart
I am married to this,
beautiful
overwhelming
liberating love
How could I even think of divorcing something in my blood?
When the adulterer comes,
trying to make me question -
"What about the hard times?"
The goodness is coming!
"What about when you feel lonely?"
I am not what I feel; love is ever present!
"What about...
NO! Stop lying!
Nothing stops goodness!
Nothing keeps me from His love!
Praise God!
Even when the adulterer tries to lure me away,
I know where my home is found.
It is a breath away.
Inhale
Exhale

FIRE, FIRE, FIRE!!!
burning love forever!
my heart burns for You
we are deep in this cave
the molten fire builds
let it burn!
let it burn!
You burn for every part of me
You are the torch and fire
the torch touches every corner of me
the flames lick up
igniting everything
love sends up a sweet smoke
holy fire burn
forever
burn away the past
burn away the unbelief
the lies
the pain
the heart ache
the fire burns it all away
and leaves nothing but love
How can fire be so reassuring?
It scares me, but it's good
I would be a fool not to touch it
it makes me better
the past is ashes now
floating away in the wind

You are weak, you don't know how to love. I know this to be true because you were able to sit across from me at the coffee shop after trying to steal a kiss from my lips and then tell me that you loved her. I laughed. If that's love then I want no part in it. I looked you up and down and asked myself what I saw in you for so long. I thought of our relationship and my head began to swirl with the messages you would send . . . to girls that weren't me. So I asked you. "When did I become not enough for you?" You blinked and glanced down, unable to meet my eyes. "Taylor, you became too much."

You're **** right I did. Any girl who has self-respect, ideas in her head and love for herself becomes too much for you. You like easy, I will no longer shrink myself to fit into the mold you lay out. Poor you. Poor her.

One night, I awoke on a beach, lonely but not alone.
She sat by the shore and I crept beside her.
And when she opened her mouth to speak,
an ocean swept me away.

She showed her abandoned sandcastles, lost underwater
as long-forgotten relics to represent impermanence.
I showed her the treasure chests I’d buried in the hope
of giving them to a lonely traveler who had moved on.
We rolled back our sleeves to reveal the fish hook scars on our skin —
caught only to be thrown back into the sea.

By the time morning came, I reached out to touch her
only to find myself lonely
and alone after all.