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Ashna Alee Khan Jun 2017
I was like  
a flaming Tyre  
  
hurtling  
down a mountain:  
  
when it hit a rock  
bounced up  
  
smashed back down  
  
splashed  
burning blobs  
on everyone  
  
...then  
kept going
Ashna Alee Khan Jun 2017
I stopped.
I began to revolve around the thing that changed me.
I became the only thing you didn’t want.
You thought more of him.
The man you despise.
My exact opposite.
You wanted to get rid of me.
You were too afraid.
You wanted to keep your friends.
I’m your friend too.
I can bring bad things sometimes, but I bring good things too.
I know you hate me now, but please don’t make me leave.
Don’t make me leave.
There’s so much we haven’t done together.
I thought you’d continue to cherish me.
But ***** it.
It’s over.
It’s too late now.
I’m done.
You’ve ended me with the call of your pistol.
Time to say goodbye
Ashna Alee Khan Jun 2017
There is a poem I have yet to write,
For how does one write what only the heartless can feel?
I speak with shards of my memory,
For I am simply a shell of what once was.
I love with my blood draining from my veins to write life, love in the empty white spaces.
I am incapable of extracting my soul from the gallows where it remains chained to my hast been.
But one can pretend to comprehend the foreign language that is my one and only fear.. love...
For love is tempting and even the empty long for impossibility.
I can say I love you in a emotionless and heartfelt tone.
For I love you in my own coldness, seeing hope is still resting on one side of your ruins, while mine was emptied long ago.
I need not feed your ears or your heart lies to speed you to recovery, but am content to give you the tiny morsels of me that remain so that your wounds May bare only scars in remembrance.
I unlike you bare no signs of redemption, so I freely give you what is still free of rot and withering so that you may live with me.
I am simply and only a shell with little crystals to give,
For love once passed through me walking away with my soul, and love is now far beyond the reach of my door.
Ashna Alee Khan May 2017
For all the times I hated myself,
For all the lies that came out of your mouth,
For all the pain I ever felt,
For all the punches below the belt,
For all the times I had to fight,
For all the tears I cried at night,
For all the scars I inserted,
For all the secrets you blurted,
For all the times I took your part,
For all the times you broke my heart,
For all the times we were involved,
For all the problems unresolved,
For all the wounds that never healed,
For all the parts of me you killed,
For all this time I lived in the past,
From this time on I am free at last.
Wrote this poem at 3. am
Ashna Alee Khan Mar 2017
Broken,
worned out,
Lost,
and you made me feel so unwanted,
and now as I sit here,
all alone,
I think of our times, our moments,
how we used to enjoy our time,
but now it's ending,
I'm watching it fading away,
I'm watching us going in the wrong direction.
I know,maybe I'm also to blame but,
If you wouldn't have gone for too long,
I wouldn't have lost my mind.
Ashna Alee Khan Mar 2017
Just to tell you,
I'm still alone here in nights.
Just to tell you,
I haven't still moved on.
Just to tell you,
I'm still looking for you.
Just to tell you,
My days aren't days without you.
Just to tell you,
My blood sets on fire when I see you with her.
Just to tell you,
I can be enough for you,
but then I see you with her,
dancing in the rain of happiness.
and then I see her,
looking at you with the same look,
I used to give you.
Isn't it just so strange,
how quickly night and time changes?
What a shame it is that,
you were so close to me like a shore to a sea,
but now you are so far and trapped in our own mind,
that you don't even have time to listen to what your heart is saying.
Ashna Alee Khan Mar 2017
I don't want you to be his,I don't want anyone around,except for me and some of your friends.I don't want you to go in any relation with any other guy except for me.
You ask me the reasons why I don't let you with any other guy?Here you are,I don't let you go because I'm **** insecure and scared that what if that guy takes my place? what if he makes you fall in love with him? what if he makes you more happy? Moreover, I don't want you with any other guy because I can't see you both especially you building up a bond with him,a strong bond, which shares love,happiness,tears,secrets and jokes. I can't hear you saying any guy "I love you". I'll die at that day, when your gaze will meet any other's guy sharing some small secrets which we share. I don't want you to be anyone else because I can't see you kissing his cheeks, and brushing his hair with your fingers. I can't see you both talking every night, every day telling how much you love each other. I can't bear watching you, going out on dates with him, sitting in a warm atmosphere and sharing some cute jokes. I can't see him giving you the warmth in his arms. I cant see him giving you his jacket in cold evenings. I can't see him holding your face and then kissing your forehead. I can't see you holding his hand on the paths your scared to take. I can't see you both travelling the world, and then taking pictures and then uploading it on the internet. I can't see you stroking his cheeks calling him cute. I can't see you both sharing food, I can't see you making him eat by your own hands. I don't want you to update him when its raining, I can't see you both dancing in the rain. I can't see when he'all put arms around your waist, and introduce you to his mates, I can't hear him calling you his girl in front of everyone. I can't see you both watching those sunsets and sunrises together. I can't see youu being shared, can't see you spending your nights in his arms.
  I know I'm being selfish here but I love you so much that I can't see you with any other guy, and for this I'm trying my best to satisfy your needs. I'm trying to give me each and every second to you. I'm trying to love you at my best and at my worst. I promise you one thing , I won't ever stop loving you and I won't ever let you down. you won't ever regret loving this loser.
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