nearly 3am
i'm inside
but i was just outside
for so long
i'm excited
shaking
jumping internally
apprehensive
immersed in clarity
breathing so loud
its sounds like a silent scream
my eyes are wide
open
searching
i see my own eyes
stare into them baby
they're shutting
act fast

Poetry is just taking

Fear
Pain
And anger
And forcing it into words

Poetry is simply taking

Sadness
Depression
And anxiety
And giving it rhythm

Poetry is merely taking

Worry
Love
And broken hearts
And making it a pattern

Poetry is taking these things
And writing it in blood
Pouring your heart out
And giving them life

The elements and I
Have a special connection

Earth:
I feel as though,
I am six feet under
Every day and night

Wind:
The gale's greedy fingers
Push me slowly
Toward the edge of the cliff

Water:
The strong ocean
Pushes me under
Continually

Fire:
The beautiful flames
Lick my skin
Slowly burning me to ash

I have a special connection
With the elements

If ever you need a shoulder to cry on,
I'm always here.
If ever you need someone to talk to,
I'm always here.
If ever you need to be proven how much you're loved,
I'm always here.
If ever you need to see a will to keep going,
I'm always here.

I can't name or count how many guys I've looked at approvingly thinking 'I'd love to **** him' or whatever people say when they give that approving eye glance and nod thing. Of course I do it. All the time. I'm eighteen for gods sake. I can look!

However,

I can count all the guys I've genuinely fancied on both hands.

I can count the guys I've really liked on one hand.

I can count the guys I've kissed on *******.

I can count the guys I've actually called my boyfriend on one finger.

But that is not the man I love.

None of them are.

Because he's not a statistic.

He's a part of my soul.