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 Oct 2018 Aynjul
Kris Balubar
SURRENDER YOUR HEART
REMOVE THE GUARDS AND RELINQUISH THEIR SHIELDS.
YOU NEED TO FEEL THIS THOROUGHLY
LOVE WAS NEVER MEANT TO BE SAFE OR MEASURED SO,
LOVE IRRATIONALLY.
JUMP OFF A CLIFF WITHOUT CONSIDERING CONSEQUENCES,
LOVE SPECIFICALLY.
PAY ATTENTION ON THE SMALLER DETAILS OF THE BIGGER PICTURE,
LOVE UNCONDITIONALLY.
BECAUSE THERE WILL BE DAYS WHEN YOU DON’T LIKE HER, BUT THE LOVE MUST REMAIN AND IN THE EVENT THAT LOVE BREAKS YOU, LET IT BREAK.
DO NOT CLOSE YOURSELF OFF OR SHUT YOURSELF DOWN.
YOUR HEART WILL BE SHAPED AND RESHAPED, BUT IN THE END IT WILL STILL BE YOURS.
AS HUMAN WE ARE BLESSED WITH THE SKILL OF ADAPTATION IT’S KEPT US HERE FOR EONS, YOU WILL ADAPT.
Not mine, but I really love this and wants to share it.
 Apr 2018 Aynjul
Tiauna
The news
 Apr 2018 Aynjul
Tiauna
I became relevant
Everyone is watching me now
But This wasn't the attention i wanted
Seems like everyone was getting their blessing
But i continued to stay haunted
Maybe this was my spotlight
For them to see my life declining
This was the peak in my journey
I called it perfect timing
In the midst of avoiding depression
And escaping my anxiety
That whole entire time i had something growing inside of me.
"Extra extra! I have cancer read all about it"
A poem i wrote a while back about me finding out i had cancer.
 Feb 2018 Aynjul
Alive
sunshine
 Feb 2018 Aynjul
Alive
I sat alongside the water.
I let the subtle sound of the gentle waves crashing against the shoreline drown out my own thoughts and troubles.
I sat in solitude from midday to sundown.
I waited for the sky to part with the day’s sunlight.
I waited for the sky to glow with bright swirls of orange and magenta, before the sky greets its stars.
Instead, the sun quietly sank away, its rays hidden by the clouds as the night rolled in.

I am the sun of my own universe.
Some days my presence is vivid and my energy is something you can’t help but notice.
And some days the clouds hide my radiance.

But that doesn’t mean I won’t shine again tomorrow.
I needed some me time today, and I found myself some inspiration.
 Jan 2018 Aynjul
laura-jessica
never ending love
never ending lov
never ending lo
never ending l
never ending
never endin
never endi
never end
never en
never e
never
neve
nev
ne
n
no
not
noth
nothi
nothin
nothing
nothing l
nothing la
nothing las
nothing last
nothing lasts
nothing lasts f
nothing lasts fo
nothing lasts for
nothing lasts fore
nothing lasts forev
nothing lasts foreve
nothing lasts forever.
hi! this is my interruption of love. if you have a different idea i respect that! please respect mine **
 Dec 2017 Aynjul
Alive
12/22.
 Dec 2017 Aynjul
Alive
what if I told you
that you didn’t have to fool me
and you don’t have to convince the world
that you have it all together
and that your world is so bright behind those rose-colored shades.

I can see past the filters and through your deceit,
your world isn’t as lovely as it seems.
but still for the audience you display a false sense of happiness
a staged idea of having it all together
so busy convincing others —
perhaps you’ll never know when you’ll be content.

it’s exhausting, isn’t it?
trying to maintain appearances?
the picture you painted for me is not the one you paint for your audience.

just
be
you
we became so preoccupied with convincing everyone that we were happy, that we forgot to actually do it.
 Dec 2017 Aynjul
C
lifetimes.
 Dec 2017 Aynjul
C
and if this lifetime
is not for us
i swear
i will search for you
in every other lifetime
and perhaps in one of them
i am yours
and you are finally mine
 Dec 2017 Aynjul
Alive
take time
 Dec 2017 Aynjul
Alive
I want you
to take the time
to discover
my mind
to learn
my fears
to encourage
my passions
to admire
my successes
to love
my soul in its entirety.

otherwise
I’ll keep the time
to do it
myself.
never settle.
 Dec 2017 Aynjul
Alive
dear woman
 Dec 2017 Aynjul
Alive
dear woman,

you are simply too ******* yourself
you have yet to realize the beauty in your eyes
you underestimate your wisdom,
yet your soul is always kind.

you are the embodiment of strength
a shining light in the dark
do not be cruel to yourself,
take time to love your body and heart.

your touch is soft and gentle
your voice is reassuring
you’re perfectly imperfect,
there’s no room for worrying.

your flaws are unique and defining traits,
still many are enamored with the imperfections you hate.

so look in the mirror and smile once more,
for you are a woman you should love and adore.
 Dec 2017 Aynjul
Alive
solitude
 Dec 2017 Aynjul
Alive
when the world moves past you
in a gust of uncertainty and fear
I would prefer to stay in solitude
rather than bring anyone near

ironic it seems, against my own advice
since I’d always tell others to not keep it inside
but I refuse to share the burdens of my mind
I’ll just remain in my solitude,
because here I have nothing to hide.
I am okay with being alone.
 Dec 2017 Aynjul
Alive
In a perfect world
Time would be tangible
I could relive the sweet moments a million times,
Feeling the same fire of emotion as I felt before

I could use the hindsight of what I’ve learned to see and do things differently
To return to a place in the past with the wisdom I have now
To alter the course of timelines and erase the wrongs

All to conjure a future just as I dreamt it,
With all the beautiful fantasies I had of us
And every blissful moment in between

A race from past to future,
trying to create what the present could be,
If only in my own imagination.
If only time could work differently.
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