And no one saw her hurting
They saw glimmering reflections of themselves
Off the broken shards that she was made up of

"Do not quit" they scream,
"Do not give up" they yell,
"Do not walk away" they blurt,
but no one is listening, and that's what hurts.

We should have learned

I can get hurt to

I am not immune to these waves of emotion

Utterly lost self control

A simple text

I was taken

Now I have an ex

An O is left in my chest

It's the piece you took

And you left me nothing to replace that

Which is in great fact

The reason I love you

And in that reason I've lost you in a pitiful way

Susceptible to the sicknesses

And that's crazy

Baby baby baby

Maybe if I didn't show as much affection

Gave you protection

Or let all things be free

But change this I can do

It hurts because it's real

Or naivety tool me for a spin

Left me in a dizzy spell

Casters magic

To a witch I know wasn't at first wicked

To the naivety you exposed with a condescending nature

I stay and remain to pace around

And its amazing to how I can reference you to everything

It's my fault for not understanding

And your fault for not accepting

Either or this chore was something your effort wasn't given

Or gave up on

That " I love you" isn't for me or anyone

You don't think I know I know what you done

Hearts collect

In a barren basement

The minds making

Where trinkets dangle

And you bare your fangs

So even if the all wasn't enough

My loving apparatus has a crack

Of all the pressure

Where your ghost haunts my memories

With the centipede nest

Followed by the butterfly of death

Or a sheet of white flower

To the relevance of every poem that's to pretty young and dumb

All the words I slew from my lips

And your acid tears

This will of addiction

With your art of rejection

This forever flu

62 cuts at negative two degrees

Is why I still love you

Just not in love with you

Eccentric

Visions

******

Merry Christmas Eve

I remember celebrating Christmas as a child
but not doubting its significance
but only realizing it was a time I loved most
Getting gifts,
the smell of fruit cakes being baked,
the smell of pine cones
I remember sneaking a drink of red wine
Having ginger beer to drink
As a West Indian child would

Your words are so beautiful
It's like I know you're lying
But I almost still believe you

To one and to all
Living on this tiny ball
Racing round the sun
I wish for you, happiness
With peace, love and justice true

You think
I love you
a little bit
you tell me

And I freeze,
a small deer in headlights
I am

I think, yes
I'm guilty as charged
And I know I should move
I should say something so I'm not judged wrongly
But I lawyer up, not commenting and plead the 5th instead

Your honor,
Where in the hell
were these words plastered
for you to read oh so well?

I swore
I kept them hidden
in an unpublished manuscript
somewhere...
Unless my eyes
leaked it to the press
Because
they've always been
that one neighborhood snitch
that talks too much
& gives me away
at the very sight of you
every
****
time

You love me
just a little
you say

I can feel
you really
want to know

But I said no,
Perjuring myself
& breaking your resolve

You see my heart
wasn't quite ready then
To be published
front page
& fully available
in stores for purchase.

Christmas time is here again
I can hardly believe
This year has passed so quickly
Soon it will be Christmas Eve

Time to bring out the decorations
Hang the lights and mistletoe
Hope I can find my coat
For it looks like it might snow

I better build me up a fire
In the old fireplace
So I can warm my hands
And Santa can warm his face

I anticipate the arrival soon
Of loved ones at my door
It's going to be one happy Christmas
With their feet upon my floor

We will spend our time together
Making memories that we will cherish
Talking and laughing with one another
As one by one the moments perish

I can tell its Christmas time
For the air smells of sweets
Sugar cookies ,cakes and pies
And numerous tasty treats

Not much time to get the gifts all wrapped
And set beneath the tree
Gifts to give to those I love
Look! I spy a gift for me

Time to take some time
To think upon and remember
The reason we celebrate
The baby in the manger

As I put another log
Upon a fire that now burns low
Within the glowing embers I see
Visions from long ago

Though I am  separated
By the many years now gone
My memories of those precious days
Within my heart live on

O, just one more time Lord
If all those I love were able
How great a Christmas it would be
To have them each gathered around my table

But I know it cannot be
Those scenes that were so long ago
I count these memories as treasure
Valued much more than gold

Listening I can hear the music
Made by trumpet bell and horn
And it tells the wonderful story
Of the morning Christ was born

All is beautiful at Christmas time
The feelings the sounds the sights
The peace within our hearts
His star that shines so bright

I wish the joy could remain
And within our hearts be always near
This joy of Christmas time
That comes to us once a year

December 2014