A fire is a tricky thing --
We set it burning in a ring
and, mesmerized, we feed its flames
Pretending it can be contained.

All it takes is just one cinder,
Set upon some naked tinder,
To create a blaze, just as hot,
And render, thus, a barren spot
From fertile lands, once lush and green.
Doomed to perish within a dream.

Monday, 9:36 p.m.

Cast the stars
Upon an ocean of ink
Twinkling
And fizzling out
Or lighting on fire
Like memories
Of mistakes

Out of all these poems I've written of love and longing,
Out of all these years searching in the sea of people,
I still yet to understand how it's possible to have words without a muse

I often wonder what it would be like to have a muse without words
I believe it would feel suffocating
As you choke on all the words you long to exhale within your next breath
For a poet to be trapped by words is to be trapped by passion

Sometimes my heart swells up so big it walks across a sea of words and sinks into the deepness of the waters
Lost among the clearer beats on land
An abnormality pushed away from love like an ancient curse buried in my skin
One day i'll make it learn to swim rather than let it sink and bathe in sin

The question still remains
Would it be better to have a muse and feel like drowning,
Or to have the the words to accompany the lonely?

The difference between actions and habits,
     is often measured by the person you're asking.  
One bump, one line, one half ounce . . .
All shared by people you don't even give a **** about.

These chemicals make me sick --
              Limitless . . . Why quit?
              When it's only ten bucks for a hit like this?
Even Jesus Christ would have gotten addicted,
              if drugs in his day were half this good.

"Yeah, I'm smashed -- but I promise I can drive fine."
      Walk and push the limits of a real fine line...
If I don't **** myself, or someone else . . . I'm happy.
       Stare death in his eyes, wink, and start laughing.

Gasping as I swerve lanes --
Stay safe, get paid. Mundane daily.
Living a-live . . .
Eat. Sleep. Dream. Get laid.  
Chase feelings.

           Please, just feel me now.
                                    You know me, right?

           Please, just feel me now.
                                    You love me, right?

I want to melt with you -- let our souls collide . . .
Dissolve the boundaries between students and teachers.
        To bridge the gap in the great divide
        No secrets between us -- bleed into the speakers.

Feel the air in your chest, and ask God for a reason
To stay or leave Him.
He makes excuses . . .

                                                    . . . Believe Him.

I have always struggled in all grades of school    
Teachers always thought of me as the angry fool    
    
I love to read, I love to draw and I love to write,    
But no one won when they got me to actually fight    
    
So very lonely, I dreaded going to school everyday    
There was no one to stop that in a loving way    
    
No one understood my issues that had yet to be reveled    
I had yet to learn that what was broken could be healed    
    
No one cared to know what was the matter with the freak    
That knowledge was not for the average person so weak    
    
I grew stronger mentally each day, my mentality growing hard    
I didn't know that in the future I would be given a lucky card    
    
A card called Lincoln, the home of the Phoenix    
People don't always go willing there, and few actually picks    
    
Almost in the center of a town I didn't really know    
There is a school like no other school in the USA, you'll wish you could go    
    
Once you hear how the teachers actually help you    
How the food is kinda good most days and people actually care, it's true    
    
I didn't believe it at first, no, not at all    
I didn't talk to anyone; I hid in a dark hall    
    
Then I met a boy in Physical Education, P.E. who called me Gypsy, thanks to my skirts    
He introduced me to the rest of his friends and they eased life's hurts    
    
My school saved my life; they helped me so very much    
My school may be called Lincoln but it has a mothers loving touch    
    
And when I was homeless they helped me find a place to stay,    
They made sure I was safe and secure each and every day    
    
They helped me overcome my issues with math and taught me more    
About poetry and rather than any door I could have opened I opened Lincolns Door    
    
They taught me that I shouldn't be afraid to learn and no one would hurt me    
If I got things wrong, with praise and love I flourished and it is clear to see    
    
I will always be a part of Lincoln and Lincoln a part of me, for only the lucky go to Lincoln, the place only the few picks    
That with college coming up Lincoln the home of the Phoenix  
  
That High School will always have a part of my heart

A nerd who loves
numbers and letters.
A nerd who wears geeky
glasses and attends all
her classes. A nerd who
bathes in literature every
night and can speak to him
in the language of poetry.
He fell in love with a nerd
like me* ~