today i turned 17 another year onto my life another candle on the cake; closer to being an adult or closer to my death my perception of aging has always been obscured unsurety fills me not knowing what lies ahead but i no longer want to live "unsure" im determined to live this last year of being adult-free ; with no worries, no doubts to live surely in everything i do ill update again in 365 days.
I have seen grown men throwing stones into still rivers rivers that are tired of running they watch small birds feast on smaller living things they breath out a steady stream of blue sadness they sit in cars reading Kerouac looking up at long naked legs they have outlived their fathers idea of youth they have played the puzzle of insolvable love they are lost in quiet rooms they ask her politely to leave they wait for the dust to settle … Clay.M
I can’t escape it. It follows me around every corner, down every alley. I just want to turn to him, but he isn’t there. Turns out loneliness is the only thing that will never leave me.