He and I are searching for the same light
In a room full of monsters and lilacs
We together found a garden
I picked the lilacs
He became a monster...

EXPECTATIONS, what are expectations?
It was a 12-letter word that I’ve set as a standard
Where anything way below, acceptance is just too hard
It was the moment I kept myself away from freedom,
Freedom of doing what I want to do
Freedom of not having fun to what I love.

Am I still the person who is willing to win this battle?

Now that I think of it,
Your opinion affects my system as it greatly matters.
I lose self-reliance because our belief prominently differs
Your words direct my capacity into incapability

I lost myself,
I lost my long-term built confidence, just so yours be followed.
I believed I never made the right choice,
The moment your opinion kept the majority’s mind closed.
I was never person I ought to be.
I was blinded by the pressure you form inside me
Letting me consider I wasn’t doing enough,
Luring me into what our society want,
Persuading me that in all things that I do, I can’t.
No, I am not a loser but. . .
I’m tired.
Set by high expectations
Labelled by your opinions
and
Filled by Pressure
Can I survive this battle?
These three just consumed my positivity.
All I have wasn’t enough,
my fighting spirit reached its limit,
I think I’ll be losing the battle.
I think I need to quit.
I quit.

I quit reaching your expectations
I quit on becoming a puppet of your opinion
I quit being a slave of pressure.
I’ll quit just so I could win this battle.

I’ll stand on my own standards and expectations
I’ll do what I think is best for me even though failure would arrive and teach me a lesson
Societal standards are up but I’ll set my own
I’ll be the queen of my freedom, where positivity overflows and life continuously goes on

Your opinion may somewhat matter
But you can’t have the compass to my journey of becoming stronger
I’ll be learning to eliminate
Just for my self-choices could dominate
I’ll turn pressure into power,
Power to survive, power to become better
I will win this battle.
No more expectations,
No insignificant opinion
No more peer-pressure to stop this motion.
No more stops just rest.
Victory is in me, all I have was the best.
I am a quitter on quitting.

seeing you wanting her,
seeing myself again wanting for repair

After those heartaches that has been done,
I never asked and rushed a sense of love to come.

After those painful stories and poems I wrote,
I never imagined how could this happiness be my thought.

After those series of "I" that I had.
You've came that I hope for it to last so bad.

I wished upon a shooting star
Yet, I never thought we'd come this far
Letting the past go,
Allowing the present to flow.

I've been through raindrops and rainbows
Happiness and sorrows
Keeping you and letting you go
Yet, what remains is that I love you.