We're almost touching.
we were walking side by side,
you're talking about cabs in your hometown.
I can feel the gravity of your hand, calling my fingers
whispering "it's alright."

We're touching but not quite.
you held my shoulder to protect me from the passing cars.
and for the first time in a long while, I felt so fragile.
In this world where I find it hard even to breathe,
you believed me.

I almost said it.
All I need is one ounce of strength to tell you every single thing that I have ever felt about you.

I want to find home in your collarbones.
Would you be kind enough to let a stranger in?
I want to seep in your being because I'm cold.
The world is harsh and my cracks are aching.

Almost.

You know that feeling?
It's raining outside
Well, monsoon just started
That kind of rain, you know?
When you're not sick of it already.

You just had a warm bath after making sure you've locked the main door because you live alone.
You come out, your hair all up in the towel turban.
Not dripping because he's not around and he likes it that way
Honestly, this is more comfortable
Its not soaking your bra all wet.

You smell of your new body wash. You decided to change the brand because the previous one reminded you of him. You did the same thing with your shampoo.
You hopeless romantic.
Who stops eating garlic bread because it reminds them of their 'ex' .
And you go around telling people that you did it for 'Health reasons'.
You fool.

But one thing you'll never give up.
Your fairy lights.
Because they make you realize how beautiful everything can look. Despite the peeling walls.

So you bask in yellow lights
Write poems that scare him away.
He probably does love them, you know?  

Come home already. Will you?

Someday
I am going to meet somebody
and she’s going to be
the moon of my life.
Someday
she will be my muse,
my sun and my stars.
Someday
she will make me swoon
and leave me wanting more
just like you used to

...
And in that moment I realized
Her pieces shatter more quickly
Than she can glue them together
And in between the broken seconds
That her universe is in chaos
Those pieces of her soul
Break down to mere dust
And float away in the winds
Of what once was
Joined by the false notion
That her future could be brighter
If only
She gathered her pieces
A little faster.

Antonia, it’s time to rise today
Your breakfast is ready, your tutor waits
“Time is running", mama says
There’s much to learn as a princess

Antonia, follow whatever we please
Stand tall and straight, hide your scarred knees
You’re no longer a little girl
You’re bound to be a queen of the world

Antonia, quickly, put on your shoes
Lace your corset so it’s anything but loose
If you’re short of breath, you’ll have to wait
A true royal must never be late

Antonia, there’s no more time to play
With your chin up, follow what we say
You must learn to be a trophy of France
To walk with grace, to speak, to dance

Antonia, stop laughing like a witch
Don’t be a disgrace, you’re not a *****
You’ll change your name and all in between
Marie Antoinette is who you are as queen

Marie Antoinette, with beauty from the gods,
You’ll marry a man you’ve never loved
You’re off to France, now say goodbye,
You are to leave everything behind

Marie Antoinette, you lover of life,
With your luxury and power, your kingdom’s in strife
As you live your own Versailles delusion
Your kingdom is brewing a violent revolution

Marie Antoinette, do you remember the sweet days of sixteen?
Here it all ends, with a cruel guillotine.
Antonia, free spirit, never meant to be
A girl chained by royalty, a reigning queen.

flatten your tongue
slip it between your teeth

n.

your little lips
forming an elipsis

o.

put them together
and may you declare
a word you’d so carefully deny—
no.

you spell it out
on table tops
shout it
from the rooftops

and when cursed hands
seek to defile your shrine
may you exclaim
"i am mine"