Isabella

Isabella Aug 2020

Okay

Why can’t I seize the day
Tomorrow feels so far
I know I’ll blink it away
Then one more will start
Each one is quite a headache
Like they always are
Oh why can’t I just be okay?
It shouldn't be this hard...

so many people have it far worse than i do, so why can’t i just be okay?

#okay #alright #fine #sad #pain #lonely

Isabella Aug 2020

Anxious

Fingernails tapping
Teeth biting my cheeks
A pressure on my chest
Eyes darting around the room
I should probably breathe

At this point I can’t quite remember
The last time my mind was at ease.

i may try and rewrite this soon, but who knows. just another thing to stress about.

#short #stress #overwhelmed #constant

Isabella Aug 2020

Knife 2

They told me to pick up the knife
That with it I’d be able to cut the rope holding my throat to the ceiling
And break the chains keeping me to the ground
So I wrapped my fingers around the cold metal
Adrenaline as hot as fire pulsing in my veins
I didn’t let go
And I didn’t free myself
Instead I brought the silver blade to my heart
Carving the words I wanted to be engrained in me forever

scars heal until i cut myself again

#analogy #knife #pain #sad #hurt #cut #sharp #love

Isabella Aug 2020

Knife

They told me to pick up the knife
That with it I’d be able to break the chains keeping me to the ground
And cut the rope holding my throat to the ceiling
So I wrapped my fingers around the cold metal
Only to feel a sharp sting as hot fire poured from my palm onto the concrete floor
But I didn’t let go
Even though I had grabbed hold
Ever so tightly
Of the wrong end

scars heal until i cut myself again

#analogy #sad #hurt #pain #love #wrong #mistake #knife #cut #bleed

Isabella Aug 2020

Truth

All these puppets wear bright smiles
While I let my mouth form a frown
They stare in wonder at the sky
As I feel my gaze drifting down
I’m told to stand and dance with them
But I am content on the ground
Sinking deep into the cobalt sea
I’d rather breathe it in, and drown

It’s much more comforting to sit alone and cry, than give in to society’s expectations and lies.

#sad #drown #pain #real #truth #honest #raw #puppets

Isabella Aug 2020

To Wash My Hands

I left to wash my hands today
And rid myself of the sun’s cruel rays
I walked into the strongest waves
No one saw, so I couldn’t be saved

The water rose up from my knees
Until it began to fill my cheeks
Salt in my lungs, I couldn’t breathe
And by then at last my hands were clean

Maybe after that they’d notice me

#analogy #notice #ocean #water #clean #hands #drown #wash

Isabella Aug 2020

Melancholy

It’s strange
That even surrounded by the
Laughs and smiles of everyone you love
You can still feel terribly
Sad
And numb
For no apparent reason

i love when one word can summarize all i feel, and all i am

#melancholy #sad #love #family #friends #numb #grey