The stars are plenty in the sky
Some reason when they’re gone I can’t help but cry
The beauty is inescapable
Yet some days it’s trapped in a distant bubble
I can’t see their twinkle tonight and it kills me
Normally their radiance fills me
But even the moon is now shrouded from worldly view
The sky seems empty with no stars, not even a few
I count the days since I last saw my light
Whether from the cold dark pavement or the highest height
I miss the constellations that made me smile
I haven’t felt that joy in quite a while
I miss the celestial bodies on the dark flat sheet
I miss watching them shimmer as I listen to my heartbeat
Please return to me my Starry Night sky
My iridescent view don’t pass me by

Tonight I feel alone
My run was awful and I cracked my phone
The moon blinds me as it’s magnificence magnifies through my tears
The stars in multitude represent my fears
I feel a great melancholy
An untapped sorrow that feeds into my folly
I weep tonight not to a nameless god
But to the bathroom mirror which shows a reflection so flawed
Tonight I sleep alone
Hushing cries and gasps for empty air
I tug at my blanket and pull at my hair
The pain has become too much
My mental state has become a physically crutch
There is no more than a vast empty space
A lonely desolate place
Scaring me even in my sleep
As in my pillow I continue to weep
Tonight I write to no one
For that’s all I have left when I am done

I feel the sunlight on my face
And it reminds me of your warm embrace
The one for which I long
When I’m weak it makes me strong
It was sad to watch you walk away
But I know we’ll make it back together some day
You don’t believe my words
How many times have I said it? Is it the second? Or the twenty-third?
I love you without earthly notion
You fill me with a variety of emotion
And I will always feel love for you and us
Love far deeper than lust
Imagine our island in the sky
On a single cloud floating by

We will make it there,
I swear

Here I am laying, filling my head
At 3 A.M rerunning every word I have said
I suppose my tears are the blood from my soul
Happy or sad it overflows out of me and I can’t seem to feel whole
I don’t want to die anymore because things aren’t too bad
But I’m tired constantly and I miss my mom and dad
That’s the thing about being an adult
You make the tough decisions yourself and if they’re wrong it’s your fault
You choose right from wrong and no one is there to tell you otherwise
No one is there to catch you in your lies or wipe the stream of tears from your eyes
Momma isn’t there to hold your hair when you *****
Daddy isn’t there to point to the sky at the comets
It’s more like a hollow and dark lonely place
Days feel like years yet weeks seem to race
I suppose we take for granted our youthful state
We don’t know what we have until it’s a little too late
I’d give anything to go back to a day before loans
Spend a day with my family before I wanted to become skin and bones
Give my brother a hug and tell him I care
Tell my father that the things he calls my mother are wrong and unfair
Play with my dog before the cancer took him away
Show up to work with enthusiasm as though it was my first day
See my town like I did through an adolescent lens
Bike through my neighborhood to the house that once was my friend’s
Run in the yard and climb that one crooked tree
Relive the trip to the forest that ended with bees
Laugh at myself when I fell off my bike
Not take myself so seriously and be willing to admit who’s right
Tell my sister “thank you” for yelling at me to not speak English
She kept me fluent and that was her wish
Go trick or treating from door to door
“Here’s some candy, would you like some more?”
My eyes fill with liquid nostalgia as they sparkle and close
My head bobs and nods as I catch it then doze
I miss the world before it got complex
Before I had to worry about what came next
I’d live for a day at the age of ten
Before things began to hurt and I was mistreated by men
I’d watch the stars with Jessica and talk about life
I’d give her a hug after a sleepover and get back on my bike
Pedaling home in the cool fall breeze
Everything was simpler back then and I took it for granted with ease
I wish to go back to a time almost half my life ago
I wake from my sleep to realize it can't be so

You were the bullet that punctured a hole

You were the pill I swallowed to die

You were the poison that played a key role

You were the glass I stuck in my eye

You were the noose that hung around my neck

You were the knife I ****** through my arm

You were the force that pushed me off the deck

You were the only thing that caused me this harm

You were my cause of death
You ripped from me my very last breath
Yet still I professed my love
I told you how I don't believe in a God above
Because he took you away
Not from this world but from my day to day
There is nothing for me to believe in
I suppose my life has been plagued with sin
Is that why He has forsaken me?
Cursed me and my progeny?
Let's be real, I won't have any.
I'll die alone before He'll have the chance
I'll one-step two with death as in "Hell" we dance