here is something that
mother told me
about god complexes:

“everyone believes themselves
to be gods among men:
even that hideous monster from your
half-remembered Hellenistic dreams
will retreat back to
his craggy hideaway and continue
with his hedonistic ways.
the poor creature:
he will don a halo,
iconize himself in caricatures
pretending that if for a moment
his veins flow ichorous that
Icarus may have envied when his wings
beat in tandem with the footfalls of
the sun chariots’ horses.

“the sun shines upon
hallowed ground, though Polyphemus
will avoid Helios’s scornful gaze.
he herds sheep––his only acolytes––
an unabashed king in his realm,
like a god plays war, or as a child
would play house,
humming hallelujah,
veins running gold-blooded.
when moon rises,
he will hang his weary
shadow at his door and retreat
to his fire-pit. perhaps this will be
the closest he will be to the gods,
basking in the heat of Hestia’s
humble hearth.

“in the end,” mother said,
“Nobody will end up deified.
Icarus may have rained down wax and
feathers in godlike fury
before tilting his head to Helios once more;
Polyphemus waded into the sea,
eyes clouded in godlike fury
before resigning himself to fate, head bowed.”

Moisty-mist on the sill,
The morning has come
There's no light still.
The winters are here
And I... feel the chill.

My breath is warm,
The air around cold
Dry season's balm
Makes me feel old.
I wish, I could, I will.
But I... feel the chill.

Body tight in blanket,
Eyes peeping around.
I look, I try, I fumble
Without making a sound.
The world's silently working
As if they took some pill
But me, I am struggling!
The task's too uphill.
So, I close my eyes and slumber
Coz I...feel the chill!

What could have been,
What should have been,
Sometimes seem more appealing,
Than what is

The roads untravelled,
The dreams never sought,
The desires compromised,
Sometimes take their toll.

Who would I have been,
If what could have been,
Had been.

Would I still be writing this poem,
Wondering,
What would have happened,
If I had taken a different turn

Or, would I be just writing different lyrics,
And try to have them fit
On the same old music?

I guess,
There would always be A road untravelled,
Or a poem left abandoned, unfinished
Stories ending before they could begin,
The mystery behind the what could have beens.

So, this is a shout out,
To all the lives I'll never live,
And the people I'll never be,

But where I landed,
And who I'm,
It is up to me,
To make it worthwhile,

And I reckon,
It is still a feat
Worth celebrating

'Cause,
As appealing,
as the roads untravelled might be,
Nothing beats the experience
And the excitement,
That the roads we travelled have brought

Maybe the stars shine
just to get a moment of your undivided attention
Maybe the leaves fall,
just to land in your palm,
Maybe it rains,
just to wash away
all the hurt from your past
Maybe the gentle breeze
only wants to caress and heal
your scars.

Maybe, these are the universe's ways of letting you know,
that it could never be the same
without you

Maybe time only passes,
according to its conspiracy to get you to my door,
maybe you and I'll keep parting,
only to have our paths criss cross again
Maybe, maybe, one day I'll get you to stay
Or, maybe, my ingeniousness, would keep sweeping me away.

**Maybe, these words are my way of letting you know,
a part of me will always be looking,
for a part of you

We no longer know what to say,
we only touch,
when you feel right,
and it is convenient

I don't hold your attention anymore
how do I know I still hold your heart?

You no longer rush to welcome me home,
you never dress up for me anymore,
the twinkle in your eyes don't dance
at the sight of me the same way

the ink splattered on the paper,
no longer takes the shape of my name

And oh, I remember how it used to be
I was in your embrace so often,
you would let your love take me high,
any time you felt I was feeling low

and, oh, you could read me so well
you knew what I wanted
way before my brain had it acknowledged

Oh, what once was, and the used to be's,
will never be, not in the same way again,
look at yourself too,
could you honestly say you're still the same?

and you were so familiar to me,
i could see your emotions display on your face
the stolen glances, the silence
I could decipher them so well

you would say "sweetie, it's all in your head"
but the soft pecks on my cheeks,
mean nothing more than a formality

but I still love you the same,
tell me I'm still the one,
tell me for you, there could never be anyone else

**and I don't know if I can take a step,
without you over-looking into it,
I feel myself suffocating,
under the memories of all the glorious used to be's

but I still love you the same, baby girl
and I would show you, if you'd only let me.
tell me
that it is not too late for us yet, please.

I'm chainsmoking your breath
Filling my lungs with your oxygen
I'm kissing your sweat
Using your body fluids like glycogen
I'm tasting your skin
My lips exploring every inch of you
I see your beauty within
I feel **** when seen from your view
I'm dressed in your shadow
When you meet my body from behind
Everytime you have to go
I wanna hit pause and then rewind
As soon as we're uncovered
I know we'll both be wetter
I love being your lover
When our bodies snare together