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"turd" poems
Though perception is interesting, how many was it really, wait, the joker never drank really? did he? **** I forget. um, but I think I recall the riddler had , wait, maybe not. um,, way under the legal limit is below two , but did he, the joker, you know how he is. considering, wait, who was counting those things? what, one and what, oh **** and we... what a **** this kat can be, wait, did he really, run the gauntlet just to show the world , oh **** pull the skit, it is too rich, and he was spotted at the bank earlier speaking of laughing next time he visited. **** writers and those skits. troublesome, and grrr, they forget to keep it clean. lol
0
Jul 17, 2015
Jul 17, 2015 at 1:28 AM UTC
Walks on the wild side, while moon walking the two step with you in my heart.
at 11:11 like we usually do we made a wish but he has the flu so we txted our wishes I made a nice wish but when I read his he had said "ish" bae cannot type properly he types worse than he plays monopoly bae still is sick so my wish didnt work I guess I can't be mad that he feels like elephant ****
0
Mar 8, 2015
Mar 8, 2015 at 12:15 PM UTC
bae says "ish"
Hi, my name is briansies the older sibling, oh yeah You see I am a bit different to the rest of the world They like drinking themselves silly, and I simply don't I want to sleep while others are still out I never took off to another city at the heat of the moment Because I worry about what could happen Instead of actually playing proper sport I will just settle for backyard sports And I will enjoy that a lot, oh yeah My highest score in a single cricket innings is 846 n.o And I try to keep my score above my younger sibling And he will say Briansies, what are you doing And I would say, I just want to be more popular than you And he would hit me with his rhythm fist, hit me oh yeah hit me Hit me slowly, man and hit me quick, oh hit me hit me hit me I would say, do you like hitting me And he will say, I hit you all night long I hit you baby, all night long, and if you can't take it, man You are a baby, waaaa waaaaa waaaaaa Then I said to him, hi, my name is Briansies, the older sibling, oh yeah Then me and my sibling, and my father went for an early morning swim And we body-surfed and splashed each other, yeah we had fun My sibling would say, this is unfair, and dad would say Oh, poor little baby, our splashing is making you very tender and weak Ooh we had better stop, don't you reckon And I wanted to be a friend to my sibling, so I said Hi, I am bop, Briansies and I am ready to bop with you, oh baby ooh ooh I want you to be happy, because I like boppin' around going bop bop bop And I go right to the shop, yeah, I am bop, the guy down the shop My sibling will call me a **** but it doesn't bother be, cause my name is Briansies, the older sibling, oh yeah, and I am so cool, dudes And that is what we want, just Briansies,
0
Jan 2, 2015
Jan 2, 2015 at 2:00 AM UTC
PET NAMES YOUR BRO CALLS YA AS A KID
Hi, my name is briansies the older sibling, oh yeah You see I am a bit different to the rest of the world They like drinking themselves silly, and I simply don't I want to sleep while others are still out I never took off to another city at the heat of the moment Because I worry about what could happen Instead of actually playing proper sport I will just settle for backyard sports And I will enjoy that a lot, oh yeah My highest score in a single cricket innings is 846 n.o And I try to keep my score above my younger sibling And he will say Briansies, what are you doing And I would say, I just want to be more popular than you And he would hit me with his rhythm fist, hit me oh yeah hit me Hit me slowly, man and hit me quick, oh hit me hit me hit me I would say, do you like hitting me And he will say, I hit you all night long I hit you baby, all night long, and if you can't take it, man You are a baby, waaaa waaaaa waaaaaa Then I said to him, hi, my name is Briansies, the older sibling, oh yeah Then me and my sibling, and my father went for an early morning swim And we body-surfed and splashed each other, yeah we had fun My sibling would say, this is unfair, and dad would say Oh, poor little baby, our splashing is making you very tender and weak Ooh we had better stop, don't you reckon And I wanted to be a friend to my sibling, so I said Hi, I am bop, Briansies and I am ready to bop with you, oh baby ooh ooh I want you to be happy, because I like boppin' around going bop bop bop And I go right to the shop, yeah, I am bop, the guy down the shop My sibling will call me a **** but it doesn't bother be, cause my name is Briansies, the older sibling, oh yeah, and I am so cool, dudes And that is what we want, just Briansies,
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32
on this october night, while i ponder on the crisp toilet seat and feel my body shiver from the awful lack of heat, one single **** compact and long, from my ******** falls, and into then rank toilet water it splooshes and splashes. on the porcelain i clench my feet and moan, it echoes through the halls, my ******** it burns! (lo, how it burns!) as if a ***** went in full with scratches. how i pray to God Almighty, "forgive me Lord for I have sinned", in this ****** place i sit aroused and weary, The light is dimmed, from the corner of my eye, my end nigh: i sigh, Lord. i sigh! the toilet paper is gone, i cannot handle the vapor (nor my **** gaper).
0
Oct 16, 2015
Oct 16, 2015 at 8:36 PM UTC
the sploosh splash of the october night turds
there's ethical idealism: where ethics is discussed... there's ethical relativism: where ethics is practised... there's ethical realism... where ethics is quantified as an improbability; and then there's ethical absolutism, where we supposedly "progress" - in this scenario are the laws of physics actually suspended: whereby oculus qua oculus is replaced - a loss of an eye is "relative" to 10 years in a cage... really?! ethics is ideal, realistic, absolute or relative... we're encouraged to live in "realistic relativism"... never in an absolute realism, since realistic relativism only compares itself to ideal absolutism... and nothing more... ever watched that film secrets in their eyes? you ever wonder what ethical idealism is to the ethnical consequence that can absorb a realistic libra? i can only believe in ethical absolutism, ethical relativism is horrid to me... relativism adorns idealism, absolutism adorns realism... a life sentence is worse than a death sentence, whether justified or not, prison is sadism, but at least ****** is simply ****** a space-time intact, a ****** penalty is not inhumane, nor a ouija board... it's time for time, space for space, the actual punishment comes with the missing adrenaline rush of the unexpected reception of the wielded weapon... either send these jealous plonkers to siberia, or sentence them to death, for you are no more than they are, nay, you are more... you're akin to cats toying, playing a sadistic games with half-mutilated mice... this is why i abhor ethical relativism of the crucifix... hence my belief in ethical absolutism in the paragraph of realism, which is perfected, by being exacted, and never, ever, being leisurely discussed, on a farcical palette with a grimace to boot: ******* a lemon; compensating the horrors within minutes, is never compensated with ordeals that last years... which is why i find the death penalty an act of authentic humanity, and not this quasi-humanitarian act of pardon, ******* hypocrites - i abhor the caged rat more than the rat gladly nibbling on a dead corpse... at least there was passion in the ****** waiting for death penalty is like killing a vermin with poison, disposing them with nonchalantly... the wise maxim states: ledo ferrum sicut id est calidi - strike the iron while it's hot... death is the dawn-broker - a new tomorrow promise - left intact, the fermenting process of ethical dynamism takes over... then again, the supposedly "evolved" preferred moral relativism to moral absolutism, because there was no moral realism to speak of, since morality could only be talked about in ideal terms of the supposedly so, supposedly fashioned via: it ought to never happen to me... and then it might, and then: oops... argument sinks like a wet fatty **** into shambles of keeping up with the presupposed pillar of argument being "impenetrable"; hey, genius, back to the blackboard!
0
Nov 11, 2017
Nov 11, 2017 at 8:50 PM UTC
4 tiers of ethics / oculus qua oculus
there's ethical idealism: where ethics is discussed... there's ethical relativism: where ethics is practised... there's ethical realism... where ethics is quantified as an improbability; and then there's ethical absolutism, where we supposedly "progress" - in this scenario are the laws of physics actually suspended: whereby oculus qua oculus is replaced - a loss of an eye is "relative" to 10 years in a cage... really?! ethics is ideal, realistic, absolute or relative... we're encouraged to live in "realistic relativism"... never in an absolute realism, since realistic relativism only compares itself to ideal absolutism... and nothing more... ever watched that film secrets in their eyes? you ever wonder what ethical idealism is to the ethnical consequence that can absorb a realistic libra? i can only believe in ethical absolutism, ethical relativism is horrid to me... relativism adorns idealism, absolutism adorns realism... a life sentence is worse than a death sentence, whether justified or not, prison is sadism, but at least ****** is simply ****** a space-time intact, a ****** penalty is not inhumane, nor a ouija board... it's time for time, space for space, the actual punishment comes with the missing adrenaline rush of the unexpected reception of the wielded weapon... either send these jealous plonkers to siberia, or sentence them to death, for you are no more than they are, nay, you are more... you're akin to cats toying, playing a sadistic games with half-mutilated mice... this is why i abhor ethical relativism of the crucifix... hence my belief in ethical absolutism in the paragraph of realism, which is perfected, by being exacted, and never, ever, being leisurely discussed, on a farcical palette with a grimace to boot: ******* a lemon; compensating the horrors within minutes, is never compensated with ordeals that last years... which is why i find the death penalty an act of authentic humanity, and not this quasi-humanitarian act of pardon, ******* hypocrites - i abhor the caged rat more than the rat gladly nibbling on a dead corpse... at least there was passion in the ****** waiting for death penalty is like killing a vermin with poison, disposing them with nonchalantly... the wise maxim states: ledo ferrum sicut id est calidi - strike the iron while it's hot... death is the dawn-broker - a new tomorrow promise - left intact, the fermenting process of ethical dynamism takes over... then again, the supposedly "evolved" preferred moral relativism to moral absolutism, because there was no moral realism to speak of, since morality could only be talked about in ideal terms of the supposedly so, supposedly fashioned via: it ought to never happen to me... and then it might, and then: oops... argument sinks like a wet fatty **** into shambles of keeping up with the presupposed pillar of argument being "impenetrable"; hey, genius, back to the blackboard!
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108
Hip hop. Equals art stop. That crude **** stopped musical fusion Right in its tracks. When it first landed, it was still music with a lotta spittle flying. Not naming names. I listened to a lot of it. Then Gangsta rap hit. Oh **** Cant accuse me of blind judgment, I still check it out from time to time How do you say.Get diverse mud flappers. Know the history. learn to play an instrument and read it so you can write it. Then come back an see me. Who am I?. John Q public. Pavlov's dog. Tin Pan Ali. Long Tall sally. Sachmo. Scratch less. Yard-bird. Donald Bird. Stubborn **** Stuff out there is weak as thrice used tea bags. And cost more to get unless you got a peg leg and a parrot ******** on yer shoulder. Lyrically, man my six year old says more about less with **** left over. What? Flame out digitized No talent constructs that make me wanna hurl, url give a dog a bone. Tin eared, tone def hoochies and synthetic cool cats. Not to mention the rough neks. Looking like they pooped their pants six times and forgot how to belt up. There are some real deal talents out there but it is like pickin peanuts out **** After disco died. Yes I said disco. It has been a circle **** in the cemetery after dark. Naw mean. But I digress. .
0
Sep 24, 2012
Sep 24, 2012 at 4:42 AM UTC
Much Ado
drunk on the dark streets of some city, it's night, you're lost, where's your room? you enter a bar to find yourself, order scotch and water. ****** bar's sloppy wet, it soaks part of one of your shirt sleeves. It's a clip joint-the scotch is weak. you order a bottle of beer. Madame Death walks up to you wearing a dress. she sits down, you buy her a beer, she stinks of swamps, presses a leg against you. the bar tender sneers. you've got him worried, he doesn't know if you're a cop, a killer, a madman or an Idiot. you ask for a ***** you pour the ***** into the top of the beer bottle. It's one a.m. In a dead cow world. you ask her how much for head, drink everything down, it tastes like machine oil. you leave Madame Death there, you leave the sneering bartender there. you have remembered where your room is. the room with the full bottle of wine on the dresser. the room with the dance of the roaches. Perfection in the Star **** where love died laughing.
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5.3k
Big Night On The Town
get ebola nerd you **** *** sag of *****
0
Oct 19, 2014
Oct 19, 2014 at 7:07 PM UTC
ebola
Sometime everybody's gonna throw you down Talk **** and look at you as a clown Life is just a big bowl of soup Everyone's in a group and I'm siting in **** Well I couldn't give a **** And I wouldn't give a **** People spike their ego and stick to it There wasn't a clue Not a person knew Emotions were starving When I needed help, I used to look for you It's like you didn't exist Not a single trace Wish I could still say a lil' somethin' to your face Always when I needed you, you were never there You were living a dream and I was in a nightmare Everyone is never who they seem You and I were never on the same team Just sugar coat it with cream My milk and cookies are there for me No one else is around To pick me up off the ground But I don't give a **** Cause I got milk and cookies It's been a while since I heard Last time it somehow resembled a **** Things used to be so great Right before I walked out that gate This was only a one way ticket After that all I heard was a cricket But I still wanted to hold on I turned to look back but you were gone This problem was never solved All my friendships dissolved Guess I didn't fall in orbit to revolve My milk and cookies are there for me No one else is around To pick me up off the ground But I don't give a **** Cause I got milk and cookies I'll never submit Cause you'll never admit To all the ******** These cries seem unfit
0
Jan 25, 2011
Jan 25, 2011 at 2:08 PM UTC
Milk and Cookies
Bring out the pottery boy Mr A said bring it out front so the other boys can see your work I took out my clay pottery attempt to the front of class and stood there holding the pottery on a wooden tray Mr A gazed at me through his black framed Beatnik glasses his eyes like huge marbles what you call this huh boy? I looked at the hand rolled clay *** haven't called it anything yet I said thinking of a name he went stern eyed at me are we attempting wit as well as pottery? He said a mild titter from some boys in the class here he said in a raised voice like a failed actor here we have an example how not and I repeat NOT to make a *** the classroom went quiet I stared at my *** lopsided and brown like a rushed **** what were you attempting? Mr A asked whatever it was it most certainly was not a *** I said nothing I gazed at him in his snot green jumper and Beatnik beard and brown corduroy trousers and sandals I don't know why I bother with pupils like you boy he said waste of my time I stood looking passed him at Danny who was boss eyed and pulling a face I suppressed a smile and looked dull go back to your place and spare me the sad boy look so I returned to my desk with my *** leaning further east and placed it down gently as if it were some work of modern art Mr A then poked Eddie in the back and held up his *** which went in and out like armless model of Greek design worse Mr A said than mine.
0
Jul 16, 2014
Jul 16, 2014 at 3:34 PM UTC
POTTERY CLASS IN 1959.
Who's **** about their **** You are, Virgo. In fact, you are so **** about your own *** hole that god forbid you ever run out of baby wipes or are unable to scrub-a-dub-dub after your daily **** But of course, that will never happen to you because you have planned out exactly where and what time you are to take a **** If you're working overtime, so is your **** No one can tell your *** hole is throbbing because you have perfected the art of the, *No, a **** is not slipping in and out of my *** hole right at this very moment* poker face. Not only do you have an irrational fear of a ****** *** hole, but you must examine every inch of your **** for any sign of potential disease or parasites.(with gloves on, of course.) Your ruling planet is Mercury, which means you probably know exactly how many times you have taken a **** in your life up until this point. **** *** Your worst ******* nightmare. Advice: Chill the **** out. The only condition you're suffering from is a mental one and it's called Hypochondria.
0
Jul 1, 2015
Jul 1, 2015 at 3:23 PM UTC
VIRGO: AUGUST 23rd-SEPTEMBER 22nd
Can there be any doubt in a mind that knows In thoughts aloof beyond our scope Professorial peaks and highs Paused words and thoughts sublime Intellect that's a world away From you and I day to day Well that's you who ponders and petulates It's more like ****** and Norman Bates Because dear proff you're a total **** A higher education **** Emeritus wizard oh high priest of thought Who reads the Times, what else of course! You graze upon its every word Like a runny smelly sloppy **** So there you have it professor **** A tribute to you the legal **** No better than any other man You worthless piece of human spam
0
Apr 26, 2013
Apr 26, 2013 at 7:48 PM UTC
Emeritus ****
Tolstoy was a boy, Ibsen was Henrik's son Hardy had a father, And see how well they've done. Byron was a grandson, And Wordsworth had a wet nurse, Thoreau had a 2 to go, Shakespeare a bad marriage, Austen was a loner, Poor Sylvia was a goner, And see how well they've done. Joyce had a ***** mind, Fitzgerald liked to drink, Richler liked to smoke, And Wolfe enjoyed a **** And see how well they've done. Fielding was a misogynist, Wilde was a jailbird; Virginia a misandrist, And Kerouac a simple **** Yet see how well they've done. Still with all their drawbacks, Look how well they've done; Like our old friend John, We surely come un-done.
0
Dec 20, 2018
Dec 20, 2018 at 10:39 AM UTC
Just Like Us
The sun awakens And i do too Should i study today? Or just hulla boo? Need to finish my syllabus But it is so monotonous To learn it word by word I'd rather eat ****
0
Oct 18, 2013
Oct 18, 2013 at 1:59 PM UTC
Pseudo Nerd
Whilst walking down the street I heard a thunderous tweet; 'Twas a straining little bird Who couldn't pass a **** The little thing was constipated, Its **** wide dilated; Tweeting loudly in mid-bog, Trying to eject a log. I observed with sympathetic heart As it trumpeted out a **** Straining, chirping loud and long, Letting off a foul and noisome pong. I watched for nigh an hour Its display of **** power; Then a final intestinal pump Produced a huge great steaming lump: A mighty ball of faeces (a giant of its species, and total bumhole splitter which shattered its feathered *******
0
Sep 23, 2015
Sep 23, 2015 at 4:44 PM UTC
The Bird & the ****
I took my ****** sister Marigold to the cinema, she had asked specifically and eventually (she doesn't speak a lot on account of her awful stammer and amazing cleft palate which has won prizes) so I knew that this was something she really wanted, and I teased for her bad taste when she told me that she wanted to see "Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Charlie and the Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Chocolate Factory". It was a Saturday evening and the local picture house was showing a re-run of the classic starring Gene Wilder as the enigmatically stylish ***** Wonka, and not that steaming great pictorial **** served up by Tim Burton and I knew that town would be busy with oiks so as a treat I dressed her up better than usual, and even gave her a hosedown to get rid of the poopy pong. She had stopped crying by the time the feature started and I think the Ooompa Loompa costume grew on her but that maybe the orange paint was a bit of a bad idea as people had stared as it was Day-Glo and she stood out like a bulldog's ******* but I stand by my decision to dye her hair green, it had taken thought and planning; it was meant to add to her excitement of the day, so I meant well, even if I was ineffectual in the end. I sat her on my lap in the picture house but still paid for two seats but I do get one ticket half price though because of her disabilities, so it wasn'€™t all bad, every cloud and all that, you know what I mean? She tends to get a little down every now and then but a £1 cinema ticket partly makes up for being born legless. I knew from past experience that the cinema staff prefer me to carry my stunted sis rather than wheeling her in (I do recall that the time I taped her to her skateboard proved somewhat a disaster - but really, the fat usher had a torch and should have watched her step or otherwise she wouldn't have bust her neck). The Ooompa Loompa costume allowed Marigold to amuse herself during the screening (as there were no leggings to the costume). She barely noticed when the fat little hero got blown up on screen except to dribble "chocolate" from her own little chocolate factory. It was, all in all, quite an eventful outing and one I might consider repeating but probably in a different cinema next time, mainly because we got banned for life when the manager saw the condition of the seat.
0
Dec 16, 2014
Dec 16, 2014 at 8:06 AM UTC
Marigold Goes To The Cinema
I took my ****** sister Marigold to the cinema, she had asked specifically and eventually (she doesn't speak a lot on account of her awful stammer and amazing cleft palate which has won prizes) so I knew that this was something she really wanted, and I teased for her bad taste when she told me that she wanted to see "Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Charlie and the Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Chocolate Factory". It was a Saturday evening and the local picture house was showing a re-run of the classic starring Gene Wilder as the enigmatically stylish ***** Wonka, and not that steaming great pictorial **** served up by Tim Burton and I knew that town would be busy with oiks so as a treat I dressed her up better than usual, and even gave her a hosedown to get rid of the poopy pong. She had stopped crying by the time the feature started and I think the Ooompa Loompa costume grew on her but that maybe the orange paint was a bit of a bad idea as people had stared as it was Day-Glo and she stood out like a bulldog's ******* but I stand by my decision to dye her hair green, it had taken thought and planning; it was meant to add to her excitement of the day, so I meant well, even if I was ineffectual in the end. I sat her on my lap in the picture house but still paid for two seats but I do get one ticket half price though because of her disabilities, so it wasn'€™t all bad, every cloud and all that, you know what I mean? She tends to get a little down every now and then but a £1 cinema ticket partly makes up for being born legless. I knew from past experience that the cinema staff prefer me to carry my stunted sis rather than wheeling her in (I do recall that the time I taped her to her skateboard proved somewhat a disaster - but really, the fat usher had a torch and should have watched her step or otherwise she wouldn't have bust her neck). The Ooompa Loompa costume allowed Marigold to amuse herself during the screening (as there were no leggings to the costume). She barely noticed when the fat little hero got blown up on screen except to dribble "chocolate" from her own little chocolate factory. It was, all in all, quite an eventful outing and one I might consider repeating but probably in a different cinema next time, mainly because we got banned for life when the manager saw the condition of the seat.
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47
waste matter discharged from the mother's bowels; feces, excreta, stools, droppings; waste matter, ordure, dung; **** poo, dirt, turds, **** "cleaning up ferret excrement": mid 16th century: from French excrément or Latin excrementum, from excernere ‘to sift out’ feces;                              act of defecating; a contemptible or worthless person; something worthless; garbage; nonsense; "this book is **** unpleasant experiences or treatment; "I went through a lot of **** last year" things or stuff, especially personal belongings;           "he left all his **** in my apartment"                              events or circumstances; _"some crazy **** went down last night"_ any psychoactive drug, especially marijuana [the good **** good **** verb: **** 3rd person present: ***** past tense: ******* past participle: ******* past tense: **** past participle: **** past tense: shat; past participle: shat; gerund or present participle: ******** expel feces from the body, soiling one's clothes as a result; expelling feces accidentally; very frightened. tease or try to deceive someone or thing. "I **** you not"                    exclamation                    exclamation: ****         [exclamation of disgust, anger, or annoyance] Old English scitte ‘diarrhea,’   of Germanic origin; related to Dutch schijten, German scheissen [verb]; _The term was originally neutral and used without ****** connotation_;             *********** from Greek κόπρος, kópros—excrement    & φιλία, philía— liking, fondness, also called scatophilia or ****        [Greek: σκατά, skatá-feces], is the paraphilia involving   ****** arousal & pleasure                        from specific feces; meanly,                 his mother said,   _u can drink my *** but don't eat my **** then she **** & *** & the boy drank but when he put the warm **** to his mouth, she slapped it out of his hand & yelled, I told u not to eat my **** & the boy began to cry & feeling bad his mother turned to let him lick the bowl &    rim the moist wet hole between        her pudgy cheeks & then gave him more of her tangy *** to drink like lemonade & chocolate chips,     sometimes it was more like sweet sherbet; but she never hit him again & he's been eating her **** ever since; now, his wife lets him drink her *** & he eats from the baby's *****
0
Aug 31, 2018
Aug 31, 2018 at 12:38 AM UTC
nolite, manducare, matris, stercore
waste matter discharged from the mother's bowels; feces, excreta, stools, droppings; waste matter, ordure, dung; **** poo, dirt, turds, **** "cleaning up ferret excrement": mid 16th century: from French excrément or Latin excrementum, from excernere ‘to sift out’ feces;                              act of defecating; a contemptible or worthless person; something worthless; garbage; nonsense; "this book is **** unpleasant experiences or treatment; "I went through a lot of **** last year" things or stuff, especially personal belongings;           "he left all his **** in my apartment"                              events or circumstances; _"some crazy **** went down last night"_ any psychoactive drug, especially marijuana [the good **** good **** verb: **** 3rd person present: ***** past tense: ******* past participle: ******* past tense: **** past participle: **** past tense: shat; past participle: shat; gerund or present participle: ******** expel feces from the body, soiling one's clothes as a result; expelling feces accidentally; very frightened. tease or try to deceive someone or thing. "I **** you not"                    exclamation                    exclamation: ****         [exclamation of disgust, anger, or annoyance] Old English scitte ‘diarrhea,’   of Germanic origin; related to Dutch schijten, German scheissen [verb]; _The term was originally neutral and used without ****** connotation_;             *********** from Greek κόπρος, kópros—excrement    & φιλία, philía— liking, fondness, also called scatophilia or ****        [Greek: σκατά, skatá-feces], is the paraphilia involving   ****** arousal & pleasure                        from specific feces; meanly,                 his mother said,   _u can drink my *** but don't eat my **** then she **** & *** & the boy drank but when he put the warm **** to his mouth, she slapped it out of his hand & yelled, I told u not to eat my **** & the boy began to cry & feeling bad his mother turned to let him lick the bowl &    rim the moist wet hole between        her pudgy cheeks & then gave him more of her tangy *** to drink like lemonade & chocolate chips,     sometimes it was more like sweet sherbet; but she never hit him again & he's been eating her **** ever since; now, his wife lets him drink her *** & he eats from the baby's *****
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53
Diarrhea boom... FLERRRRRRRK!!!! I am sweating on this silent throne, Cold is my sweating double lump, my butt-ox. Dripping sopping is my hole, wet for you, my boo. PLUMP!  SHPLOOP!  SQUISH! UHN! UWAAAAAH! That is my plural drip, my dipping **** flow, Niagara. Ookatini flip, my pencil fell in. Fish it out with my hand. Ooh, Telpavin.  Time out time, sitting on the toiley. There is no doiley to conceal this mess.  Ten sixteen. 3 A.M. 7 A.M. I'm not even wiping yet. My dad comes in from working the steel mill.  He needs the can. I cannot. Offer him. It. I wiped for hours. Then I pooped again. Like an elephant. I need a colostomy bag. Diarrhea Boom part 5
0
Aug 17, 2011
Aug 17, 2011 at 1:02 AM UTC
Diarrhea Boom
/ *oh no no no... you don't get a jew artefact at this point, when the play of words comes between the son and the mother... no no no... you're target; she should be a **** a stripper, a ***** but when you do what this, "englishman" did? undermining the concept of personal property? ownership? his property infringes on your property, and somehow: my, yours, our's doesn't compute... i'm ******* craving to **** my neighbour... because all i have left to lose is... frothing at the mouth.* at a supermarket: within the confines of a cashier: - 'is this your typical friday night?' say it plain, chubby... **** it: more cushion for the pushin'...    sunglasses at 6am? a reply:       - 'it could be'   - 'if you were part of it'             - 'what?' i'd love to fiddle with excesses of porky...    migrant crisis?   more like a ***** cricis...     import black **** given the white boy lay low... it's not even funny, i find it funny attempting to whistle... which i can't, given that i found laughter... just don't come between me and mt "neighbour": cos i'll **** the ******* **** and "he's" watching me? sorry:      i'll **** the ******* **** fuck-face-tard! no, i will;   i can't conceive retaining the anglophone aspect of comedy within the confines of the monologue, with a cabaret....          i'll **** him... next time we exfoliates speaking to my mother, and not... looking          into my eyes...       "englishman": spew!    you! now! clean up this *********** *******       english! like you bred a people, gesticulating with a hand gesture... new yankies...     britain: home,            of the the wankies. p.s. no... private property contra private property within this ****** vogue...              i seriouslly will throw a **** into his garden, and say...                 not enough fox hunting, d'uh!
0
Jul 21, 2018
Jul 21, 2018 at 1:18 AM UTC
fly ************ fly!
/ *oh no no no... you don't get a jew artefact at this point, when the play of words comes between the son and the mother... no no no... you're target; she should be a **** a stripper, a ***** but when you do what this, "englishman" did? undermining the concept of personal property? ownership? his property infringes on your property, and somehow: my, yours, our's doesn't compute... i'm ******* craving to **** my neighbour... because all i have left to lose is... frothing at the mouth.* at a supermarket: within the confines of a cashier: - 'is this your typical friday night?' say it plain, chubby... **** it: more cushion for the pushin'...    sunglasses at 6am? a reply:       - 'it could be'   - 'if you were part of it'             - 'what?' i'd love to fiddle with excesses of porky...    migrant crisis?   more like a ***** cricis...     import black **** given the white boy lay low... it's not even funny, i find it funny attempting to whistle... which i can't, given that i found laughter... just don't come between me and mt "neighbour": cos i'll **** the ******* **** and "he's" watching me? sorry:      i'll **** the ******* **** fuck-face-tard! no, i will;   i can't conceive retaining the anglophone aspect of comedy within the confines of the monologue, with a cabaret....          i'll **** him... next time we exfoliates speaking to my mother, and not... looking          into my eyes...       "englishman": spew!    you! now! clean up this *********** *******       english! like you bred a people, gesticulating with a hand gesture... new yankies...     britain: home,            of the the wankies. p.s. no... private property contra private property within this ****** vogue...              i seriouslly will throw a **** into his garden, and say...                 not enough fox hunting, d'uh!
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i hate road rage in canberra because i hate road rage in canberra because mostly the road rager is at fault i hate road rage in canberra because because my mum was just turning and some dim wit sticks his finger up, how rude i hate road rage in canberra because it ****** me off immensely road rage road rage i hate road rage cause the road rage person doesn’t know what they are talking about it’s not just road rage, ya see ya see, it’s everywhere you say something or do something and someone sticks their finger up at you like a good little **** would actually do road ragw road rage road rage sux the only rage i like is partying late at night you see i am a middle aged rager i rage all day long but when it comes to road rage, na, not for me i party better than any of these road rage people the road ragers are just a pack of old stick in the muds they think they are cool, sticking their fingers up but in hindsight, they no nothing you see i hear the loud hey, but that is from people who like road rage which i ain’t, what is wrong with hating road rage that is why i don’t drive, i am a kid and the road ragers are old fogie men or women i have road rage in canberra because, nobody wins, it’s all just a waste of time i am glad i don’t drive, i am a cool kid mate
0
Jan 10, 2016
Jan 10, 2016 at 10:25 PM UTC
i hate road rage in canberra because.......
My country right or wrong we shall still sing her song and bombs away on you Bombs away on FDR we think he got away too far in giving peasants below, our merit, the audacity to inherit, our country 'tis only for me' We'll work you until your flesh falls off, nine till five is not enough, to sell our gizmos here and far, to gluttons all alike Ooops! (melody old man river) ...  Oh tote dat barge and lift dat bale, ya gets ah little drunk and ya lands in Jaaail Pull yourself by your own bootstraps, who cares if opportunity naps, while the "America Dream" fades away cause thirty years of us America ' tis only for me but not those signers of Democarcy in Philly where they took that oath, on that **** parchment I abhor, on that damnable parchment I ABHOR!!
0
Sep 24, 2014
Sep 24, 2014 at 11:35 AM UTC
Conserve-a-turd-ism
Sometimes I wish I didn't feel I wish my heart was made of stone That I was immune to all this **** Of being on my own My world is full of cockwombles Fuckwits & ***** trumpets **** burglars & **** puddles **** stains & **** nuggets! And those are just the few That I've had the joy of meeting I'd like to dare the rest to meet Somewhere - however fleeting Stand up and be counted You liars, cheats and cads You wazzocks & jebends I'll grab you by the ****** Because I've simply had enough Of being treated like a tool Of believing all the **** you spout Like some poor pathetic fool I cannot shake the feeling That the stupidity I feel Is down to the betrayal Of all the lies that you conceal So I'm giving up compassion To empathy goodbye And to trusting blindly what I'm told Farewell & fuckety bye! (C) Pixievic 2016
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Mar 1, 2016
Mar 1, 2016 at 12:42 PM UTC
Trumpets, Burglars & Puddles
Demented bandit Redundant pundit Fun time gambit Screaming "Bomb it!" Vicious ***** Cannot stand it Mend it, bend it Maybe tow it How it goes It goes all wrong It wrongs no more More than it should But more it could I guess it would But that would hurt Oh what a **** The world is burnt And I feel like a picture blurt You've censored too much Ventured too far Gotten all such Answers fewer Violent fever Violet furor Volatile gore Gory tumour
0
Sep 9, 2019
Sep 9, 2019 at 11:37 AM UTC
freestyle blabber #10
There he is the loudest guy in the bar Boasting about clandestine OPS and battles he’d ‘prefer not to remember’, But he does, because he has an audience There he was in Ramadi, Korengal, Tikrit, Kandahar, pinned down by dozens, no hundreds, of enemy fighters. His best mate, was hit by shrapnel or an enemy round. He screams for Doc But no help comes The barroom hero applies a compression bandage, but the blood continues to flow through his fingers Minutes pass, his buddy worsens. Doc arrives, finally. The buddy is stabilized and loaded onto a stretcher He’ll be on the first bird out The battle hardened warrior continues his tale, regaling his table with airstrikes, CQB, and taking the battle to the enemy. Someone asks, “What unit were you in?” He replies proudly, “The Second Ranger Battalion.” You set your own beer down and spin from your chair. You make your way from your table to his. You place a silver coin upon it, “Second Ranger Battalion,” you say, “Coin Check.” The color drains from his face Fear in his eyes and an ‘Oh **** expression on his face, He stammers something about being ‘attached’ and having orders for Ranger School once. Your icy glare tells him that he’d better **** and **** before he is no longer able to do either. He throws a $20 onto the table and finds his way to the door. ******* ****
0
Nov 6, 2015
Nov 6, 2015 at 1:07 PM UTC
Stolen Valor