Come and let us live my Dear,
Let us love and never fear,
What the sourest Fathers say:
Brightest Sol that dies today
Lives again as blithe tomorrow,
But if we dark sons of sorrow
Set; o then, how long a Night
Shuts the Eyes of our short light!
Then let amorous kisses dwell
On our lips, begin to tell
A Thousand, and a Hundred, score
An Hundred, and a Thousand more,
Till another Thousand smother
That, and that wipe off another.
Thus at last when we have numb’red
Many a Thousand, many a Hundred;
We’ll confound the reckoning quite,
And lose ourselves in wild delight:
While our joys so multiply,
As shall mock the envious eye.

on beds of fragrant sights
through charms of sourest deeds
it rains away all spring
all when my heart bleeds

--------------------------------------------------------­--------------------------------------------------------------

i­ know not who i'll be
or what i really am
an immemorial soul
in nimbler storms which swam

among the crowd of flowers
so sickeningly sweet
would lie the boldest aphids
upon the roses feed

my feathers trod on winds
challenge His modest grace
through marching fleet of life
in ****** shadows laid

with semblance of a calm
in grooves of wilderness
in arms of ecstasy
which life stands to confess

but how shall these two feet
embark a lonely trip
perhaps find love so still
as dew on roses' lip

------------------------------------------------------------­----------------------------------------------------------

in faintest of moonlights
on dewy grasses seen
inscribed upon my palm
is meaning of my being.

A piece of you..IS ENOUGH..

My dearest,it's a privilege for me to have known your heart.
It's been an honor to have heard your past,your thoughts and even the normal to chaotic things that's happening in your life but best of all it's been a blessing to have loved you.

I am not asking much of you my dearest..
Only this moment to make you feel loved by me. I have no expectations..
The fact that you have love me in return is ENOUGH.
Enough to say to myself,****,i am lucky..because i have loved and love a person who had given me more.
Do you know what you gave me dearest?
Not just the gift to be loved back..BUT YOU GAVE ME one thing that i lost so many years ago..MYSELF.
Time and again i have said thank you to you,many times i have shown you my gratitude because i am truly and entirely grateful to you.You gave me back my life and even changed me..

I am like an old house,renovated completely by you.
Everyday,you had fixed me.Every broken window of my soul,every cracks in the walls of my heart and holes in the ceilings of my life,you change it and fixed it.
In return,i am slowly rebuilding myself..and will never stop rebuilding myself till the windows of my soul is completely open to invite fresh air of adventures inside my life.I will never stop cementing the cracks of my heart till its clear enough to let something wonderful inside it forever and i will never stop repairing the ceilings of my life till its good enough to withstand the strongest storms and winds that will come.

You gave my life a GO..and i am pushing forward to be better.I am not asking much my dearest.
A piece of you is enough.A piece of you is enough NOW.
To have you in my life now is whats important to me.I am here,even if you lash out hurtful words or give me the sourest mood because you had given me yourself in the time i am totally ******* up and when everyone in my life had whipped me painfully and wiped me out of their lives.

You have stood by me and taught me well..
Yes you had given me the hardest tasks,i cried several times when you get mad at me for failing your instructions..You pushed me so hard and break me..But in the end,You gave me another thing back and that is my voice..My voice which can now speak bravely what's in my mind and what's in my heart..

A piece of you is enough..a piece of your time is enough..Enough to make me smile the whole day like a fool..a piece of you is enough to make me happy.You make me happy.I hold every little piece of you and your time here in my heart everyday like a rare diamond.

You might say i am thinking only through my heart but whats the use of thinking with your mind?a mind can deceive a thought spoken but a heart does not.So here i am speaking to you,with my heart on my hand with only three words on my lips..I LOVE YOU..I love you and i love you enough to tell you,your past doesn't matter to me..I love you and you and whoever close to you matters to me.YOUR HAPPINESS MATTERS TO ME.

Forgive me my dearest if i tell you my silly dreams.Dreams and wishes that one day,someday,i got to be where you are,make silly plans for me and you.Silly dreams that i can take care of you or make you pancakes in the morning..Hold you close at night to ease your mind,kiss your forehead when things hurt you so much and squeeze your hand just because i want you to feel my strength beside you..Just to say "baby,things are gonna be okay..in the meantime can i buy you an ice cream just to take your pain away?"

Those are silly dreams my dearest from someone who loves you dearly.I am not expecting it to happen..those are just dreams,nice and sweet thoughts to let you know that somewhere someone wishes for you..someone cares for you.

I can't offer you much,just this dreams and my heart.Yes,those are dreams my dearest,dreams and plans are two different things..I do want to make plans with you but we definitely don't know where life,our lives are heading too..

Sorry my dearest,if i scared you with my plan to go to where you are..But like i said..With or without you..Please be glad that i am moving forward.I don't expect much,i don't expect anything at all..To love you now and have this moment with you now is ENOUGH..

You need not to worry if you're going to hurt me,because you're not going to hurt me.And if you may hurt me,that's okay my dearest..Only words bleeds..nothing more..People come and go in our lives..But what matters is..they came.What matters to me is that YOU CAME..

A piece of you is enough..I don't know what happens in the future,you don't know that too..A piece of you now is enough..a piece of you that i love.Love enough to say my future is bright..i don't know what the future will bring but i am pretty sure now that its going to be wonderful.I will be better..I will fulfill my dreams.I sure want you to be by my side and hold your hand..And say "baby,look at me,i did well" but if not..Like you said awhile ago,if i bumped into you and you have someone new,I'll just smile and say "hi.i did well and guess what,i tasted the best fries here in Amsterdam because of you."

You need not to worry if you will hurt me I LOVE YOU.I AM NOT LIKE THE OTHERS IN YOUR PAST.always remember one thing..You and i are FRIENDS..we started that way.REAL FRIENDS DON'T HURT ONE ANOTHER.If one changes..the other UNDERSTANDS.i will always understand..Even when you said a while ago that you will cut me off entirely,i will still understand..because loving is understanding and loving is wishing only happiness for one another..The wind may blow in different direction but i want you to know A PIECE OF YOU IS ENOUGH AND A WHOLE OF ME WILL ALWAYS BE HERE,HERE TO WISH YOU NOTHING MORE THAN TO BE HAPPY..ALWAYS..

I love you,a piece of you is enough..knowing you is enough..you are enough.

They that have power to hurt and will do none,
That do not do the thing, they most do show,
Who, moving others, are themselves as stone,
Unmovèd, cold, and to temptation slow,
They rightly do inherit heaven’s graces,
And husband nature’s riches from expense;
They are the lords and owners of their faces,
Others, but stewards of their excellence.
The summer’s flower is to the summer sweet,
Though to itself, it only live and die,
But if that flower with base infection meet,
The basest **** outbraves his dignity.
    For sweetest things turn sourest by their deeds;
    Lilies that fester smell far worse than weeds.

hey, wake up.
there’s that girl at the door for you again:
this time she’s got you a little cardboard box
full of withered browning poppies
straight from her garden;
rain-stained and trembling,
she’s got on the sourest of smiles.
she’s crowding your room with remains,
she’s teaching you self-preservation,
she loves you.

today, she’s knocking on your door
with the impatience of a devil;
yesterday, she’s holding your hand,
rolling the pads of her fingers
over every bump of your knuckles
complimenting your bone structure.
“when you die, give your body to science,”
she says, and you know that she means
‘give it to me’—you have already said yes
quite some time ago now.

today, you’re waking up,
you’re wondering the time,
you’re opening the door,
you’re saying hello i missed you.
it’s been fifteen hours.
you’re eating your heart out
and feeding her the scraps.
tomorrow, you're picking meat
from her teeth, just one little bird
that can't believe its luck.

she invites herself in, and you see
with a little stumbling delight
that she’s wearing those gloves you like,
oh, that soft old berry-red pair—
the ones that smell of ash and ink,
used matches and newspaper-print.
she peels them off her hands,
presses them into yours, and,
entirely shameless,
you grip them tight.

you savour their warmth,
you savour their feel.
you consider residual skin cells.
you consider honest infatuation.
neither of them seem to you
to be the truth and nothing but,
not quite, not wholly.
you love anatomy, you love her.
save the both of you some trouble
and don’t bother trying to choose.

she’s sitting on the edge of your bed
and she smells like old perfume
that wants to tell you it smells
like a summer day;
she’s kicking off her shoes,
she’s talking about cutting your hair:
where do you keep the scissors?
she’ll say she wants to paint your nails, too
but really she just wants to think
about tearing them out.

it’s hard to know but you think
you might want that too.
everything’s so complicated—
you just want to be beside her
so that’s where you are! now
she’s ******* crisp shrunken petals
right into your mouth. is she?
she’s got her nails on your lips either way.
you’re tasting nature at its end.
you’re just waiting to join it.

hey, wake up.

they eat their own inconsequential and comatose integrity.
With relish.
they chew their knotty and petty problems endlessly
into bowls full of intellectually based uber slop
seasoned with bitter  inchoate knowledge
and then add  a dash of verbose celebrity froth.
Stir well.
they grind all their societal and artistic obsequiousness
into salubrious and meaningless observations
and then add the sourest flavour of the month
and stir with inconsequential turmoil.
and oh boy how poets can stir!!.

You are hideous and horrible
Your voice is like nails on a chalk board
As you taunt younger children
You are like a monkey on stilts
The way you try to fit in and know you don’t
Your face is like a cat that just ate the world sourest warhead
When you scowl and glare at your new enemies and old friends
You are like a snake
The way you sneak your good grades into the trash
Then you lie and say you failed
You are like a horrible gossip channel
Making fun of others to bring you higher
You are like an ongoing cycle
Changing all the time
Like time
The way you keep going and never look back
You are dumber than a box of rocks when it comes to life
Why?
Because you gave up on your true friends for fake ones
You stepped over a dull dollar for a shiny dime
You are like a siren
Making people see what you want them to see
But not you what you are
Just another nerd like me.

Avatar Queen
The mask or the screen,
What’s never to know
What’s never to see

Avatar Queen
Your name to mislead,
One more cryptic posting
That always deceives

Avatar Queen
Both petty and preened,
The bees in your bonnet
No stinger foreseen

Avatar Queen
You know what I mean,
With feelings all borrowed
And vistas unseen

Avatar Queen
The sourest cream,
No reason to wish
All hope dressed in green

Avatar Queen
Your anger unweaned,
My answer then sharp
My rapier free

Avatar Queen
Not to sleep or to dream,
Your nightmare awoken
In daylight you scream

Avatar Queen
One curse washes clean,
Your blessings defaced
  —no chance to redeem

(Villanova Pennsylvania: July, 2016)

you might as well
asked me to drink
bleach through a straw,

boiling to a point where
i could smell the sharpness
like a needle through my nose

and when girls say they
tried to drink men away, i
laugh at them

because yellow teeth
and lemonade
from the sourest of lemons,

squeezed and strained through a
sugared cloth by the hands of
your mother's mother

still tastes like ****,
sour as it may be
life is nothing more

than an endless
under-sink
cabinet

Will sweet dreams with the sourest links to you, be traced?
As unkind dreams, they come to haunt.
But shadows loom under the sky of a setting sun,
Will angels come as the walls fall down?
Death comes with a silent taunt
Sands of time, a mirage left intact in the world's eye.
Show me meaning, show me life,
With the dawn comes light,
So why does it feel like I can never wake up?

Life throws me a grenade
A lemon if you will
The sourest it could find
I like sour, but still

At some point I need sugar
But the effort is not but strife
So my only option is
To throw the lemon back at life

When the snow melts
and the weather gets warmer
Only then can my true happiness can come
The long days full of
sweat
Dirt
Mud
Even after i come home for the night
I will still find pieces of hay in my hair and my clothes
Putting days worth of training
In hopes it will pay off
when the weekends come
And i can go to the shows
And may i find myself emotionally unstable i can find my way to the stables
i will find my happiness
in somthing so dangerous
with a mind of its own
but have total faith
that it'll do me no harm
even on the sourest days
i can find the sweetest escape
a hand full of mane
running free out in a feild
no saddle or bridal to keep us trapped
just our souls
dancing in the wind

I tasted fate in different flavors,
The sourest I held the dearest.
Dripping wounds in tangy shower,
Life is but the sum of memories.

I've been really, really anxious lately.
Like, there's this giant knot
In my chest.
And I just keep tugging
And tugging
But it won't loosen.

It keeps getting tighter
Like a noose.
I can barely breathe.
My heart is pounding louder
Then my thoughts.

I don't know if I
Just can't hear them,
Or if they're not there
At all.

My old dance company,
It no longer exists.
To put it short,
They finally got their new name.
Elements.

Maybe that's what I feel.
Elements.

There's fire.
In my heart.
Anger, I guess.
A lust for movement;
For joy.
Waiting to be filled.

But at the same time,
I'm full of ice.
Shivering.
Like a rat in a storm drain.
Is that all I am?

I miss the Earth.
Being outside.
When I was a little kid,
Now, I'm sorry, this is gross.
When I was a little kid,
And I'm talking like one or two.
I used to be that kid
That would lick ants off of rocks.

Like one time,
And we have it on film.
One time it got so bad that
I had to take an outdoor shower.
My mom hosed me down
right in front of the big tree
outside my apartment.

Now I can't even listen to
The rain,
Without gagging.
The stench.
That terrible stench.
Worms are worse
then rotting corpses.
I can handle week-old roadkill
With the windows open.
But a summer storm
Will nauseate me.

I miss when I was a little kid,
And water made me happy.
I miss being happy.

Elements.
It's bittersweet.
Not like dark chocolate strawberries sweet.
Like, the world is crumbling at my feet,
but at least I have you sweet.
Like, you make the sourest moments
Into the brightest ray of sunshine.

There is nothing I love more than you.
There is no one I love more than you.
I had no idea that I would miss
dancing so much.
That I would miss
You so much.

I am trying to make friends.
I am.
I am trying to find a family.
But what's the point?
You. You are my family.
I feel like ****,
Thinking that I could ever replace you.

But what else can I do?
I can't go back.
I told myself I could.
I told you I could.
I told you I would.
But I lied.

I can't predict the future.
When I promised you,
My love, when I lied to you,
I thought nothing would change.

But you changed your name.
You moved away.
And I did too.
And now I don't have the courage
to face you again.
I said goodbye.
And maybe that was a mistake,
But it's too late for me to change my mind.
I can't turn back the clock.
Just like you can't turn back yours.

Without you,
I am so lonely.
I am so ******* lonely.

I miss your hugs.
And the smile they'd bring to me.
If I could wrap up those emotions,
And sell them by the bottle,
I'd be able to buy a plane ticket
And fly to you.
Just to get another hug in person.

If I could just get one text back.
A single text.
It would mean the world.

And you,
If you could stay off that phone
For one minute.
And talk to me instead of him,
Show me any ounce,
Of that empty, empty word.
Maybe I could try to find
Its meaning again.

I feel like a rectangular peg,
Shoving myself into a circular hole,
And I've tried to file myself down.
I've tried to fit.
But I am never going
To be a circle.

I've looked for things to replace you.
Other groups I can
shove my attention into.
They all just tighten the knots.
Each one grabs a piece of string,
Tugging every single direction,
Each wanting me to snap.

Maybe the world is just too
Dark for me to ever get
A good picture.

Maybe I haven't lived in one
Dark enough to turn it into light.

Maybe I'll never be good
Enough for poetry.
Just like I was never
good enough for you.
My picture wasn't good
Enough in the air,
So I tried taking one myself.
And I tried again.
And again.
And again.

They all seemed so nice.
But I don't even know their names.
I could never reach out to them.
Get to know them as I've known you.

I have never felt so alone
In my life.
In a room filled with people,
How could I be the only one there?
In an empty room,
How can so many eyes
Be staring at me?
Just waiting
For me to make another mistake.
To **** up.
Again,
And again,
And again.

For I'm just a child,
Starving for attention.
And I've never even heard of this game.

I go to sleep every night,
Hoping, praying,
To wake up.
In my own bed.
My dog at my feet.

I want to go back to the studio.
I want to hug you all,
One by one.
Promise that I will never
Fall asleep again.
I want to wake up from this nightmare.

I want her to make us a beautiful dance.
I want to see her smile.
A coffee in hand,
Light radiating out of
Every atom in her body.

I want to forget again,
And be scared shitless
Of disappointing you.
I want to put all the hate
I have for myself onto you.
I want you to hate me,
So that I don't have to.

I want to go back to that
Purple dressing room.
With the masks on the walls.
When that room still had a sense of calm.
I want to sit down on the white bench,
And look at you atop the window.
I want to see your smile.

I miss tapping.
Being loud.
Making noise.
I want to make sound,
Without that sound
Being annoying.

Because after every
Word I say,
I want to claw out my
Vocal cords,
And never return.
I want to be silent again.

I want to see your face,
When I finally felt free.
I wish I could go back.
I wish I could say yes.
I wish I hadn't said goodbye.

I want to pull into that
Parking space.
Overlooking the pond.
I want to go back to that day,
Where I sat on a donkey.
And you on the branch.
And we laughed.
And we played.
Like little kids.

I miss the cheeseburgers
We ate at Culver's.
I miss exploring the theatre.
Hiding behind the door,
That we could never look inside,
And trying not to fall
Down that platform
Near the stairs.
Because we didn't shy
Away from fun
Just to avoid getting hurt.
I wish I could let myself get hurt.

I want to fight with my sister.
To prove to her that dance is more
A sport than soccer ever could be,
I want to sit in her room,
And pretend to care about whatever's
On the television,
Just so I can see her face.
And hear her voice.
And feel her presence.

I want to watch television
With Dad.
I want us to talk
About something other than science.
I want to go on a walk.
Look at the stars.
I wish you would have
taken me camping.
Because I was wrong.
I did want to go.
I do want to go.

I miss seeing all of you
At the benches
Before school started.
I miss my locker,
And how you would write me notes.
I miss you grabbing my phone every time
I looked away,
And filling up my storage
With useless videos
That I cannot stop watching.

I miss loving the people I'm with.
I miss happiness.
And it hurts.
Because I knew things would change,
I did.
But I didn't know
That nothing would be the same.
I just want something to be the same.

Dream ( Acrostic)

During the day you can’t find it,

Reappears never ever as though it was a bandit

Every Night a new adventure begins,

Aeons have passed but, moods it continues to lightens,

My dreams would get me a genuine grade, but some I can’t submit


Worth More Alive
United for wildlife is trying so that the tuskers can strive,

A hundred killed every day, and soon there will be left only five.

The elephants are ultimate help in construction and in gardening,

You do them well, they come to pay you homage barging,

I don’t know about you, but I think elephants are worth more alive.



Smile ( Acrostic)

Sometimes it’s great to simper,

Many take it as pass on letter,

In one go, it can brighten many days,

Laughter now fills the air no matter how strong the sun blaze,

Everyday to smile is the thing one should always remember.


Opened Its Wings
A ship once sailed to this dock,

By accident, it went loose and went on an amazing adventure,

It went to a place it thought it was too feeble to go to,

But that was just its starting point,

Ever since, it has had great adventures, only because it let loose and opened its wings!

RINGS THE EUPHORIA
We promulgate tussle a times

And at time rings the euphoria in the sourest limes,

We have clubbable times and even doleful one,

Sometimes we can be fidus Achates and sometimes with each other we’re done,

But whatever happens we’ll be sisters, like two chimes in a wind chime

You were the sweetest
guy I knew and I turned you
into the sourest.

While thou on Tereus descant'st better skill.
Some in their garments, though new-fangled ill,
For nothing this wide universe I call,
My love is as a fever, longing still
'Long may they kiss each other, for this cure!
Doth in her poison'd closet yet endure.'
He kisses her; and she, by her good will,
To accessary yieldings, but still pure
But low shrubs wither at the cedar's root.
He shall not boast who did thy stock pollute
And leave the faltering feeble souls alive?
And, thou away, the very birds are mute;
For now she knows it is no gentle chase,
Because the cry remaineth in one place,
To change your day of youth to sullied night;
Dulling my lines and doing me disgrace.
Then call them not the authors of their ill,
Like to a mortal butcher bent to ****.
'O Jove,' quoth she, 'how much a fool was I
An humble gait, calm looks, eyes wailing still,
But her foresight could not forestall their will.
The silly lambs: pure thoughts are dead and still,
To love that well which thou must leave ere long.
Is form'd in them by force, by fraud, or skill:
Whose ridges with the meeting clouds contend:
Were it not sinful then, striving to mend,
Doth half that glory to the sober west,
In true plain words by thy true-telling friend;
Above a mortal pitch, that struck me dead?
Is madly toss'd between desire and dread;
For all my mind, my thought, my busy care,
A second fear through all her sinews spread,
And, blushing with him, wistly on him gazed;
Her earnest eye did make him more amazed:
And for my sake serve thou false Tarquin so.
That two red fires in both their faces blazed;
That all the world besides methinks are dead.
For then is Tarquin brought unto his bed,
For sweetest things turn sourest by their deeds;
O me, what eyes hath Love put in my head,
He ran upon the boar with his sharp spear,
Stands on his hinder legs with listening ear,
She tears the senseless Sinon with her nails,
Doth yet in his fair welkin once appear;

There is a hidden word,
in this.                Can you find it.
            It's quite inconspicuous.      Like a raisin in a bowl of grapes.
What a funny relation, you might ask.        
                                  But here's the explanation: It belongs there,
the raisin,
                                                         ­                                                             In the bowl of grapes.
Because it used to be a grape,
But now it's just kind of shriveled.   A dried up grape.
                                                          ­                                     Nonetheless. (None-The_Less)
There is a word, that's a raisin, disguised as a grape in a bowl of grapes

And honestly if a raisin is in a bowl of grapes,
it needs help.


But we have yet to address the color of the grapes,
and the color of the raisin.

And are the grapes large while the raisin small,
like the runt, little sourest grape, gone and withered away,
because then it can fit in between...In the voids.
And it's harder to


      find.

Irrelevant.
Because I already told you the word.

The weeping folds of that woven truth
Hang beautifully plain upon a saviour
Scorned and scourged in purple cloth
Devouring breath in luminous colour

Crossed in pain on that wooden frame
Crowning thorns adorn his golden halo
Compassion hangs in tear filled shame
While women suffer in fearful sorrow

Pierced with steel and proffered vinegar
The driven nails a scourging iron trinity
Denying life with sourest wine writ bitter
Mockery upon a final wooden sanctuary
Cruelty impales our sweetest redemption
Forgiveness is our beautiful resurrection.