"prt" poems
Dey real kewl. Dey
selfie skool. Dey
glow goonz. Dey
PC geeks. Dey
luv Jay-Z. Dey
RT #JK. Dey
tan tangaz. Dey
pRT bangaz. Dey
dwn danger. Dey
jack jäger. Dey
dbl dip. Dey
do trip. Dey
l%k weL 7k. Dey
die s%n, LOL innit.
Apr 18, 2014
Apr 18, 2014 at 5:03 PM UTC
I remember
When a the word relapse
had A meaning .
When I’d Explain what it
Meant so you can be aware.
Told you what tempts me
What are some triggers.
I Expected You to
View it as a 911 call.
To help me when I’d fall.
You never payed mind
To the importance of it.
Just like you Didn’t think
Telling you I had an addiction Was something that bad.
I remember when
You Made your own definitions
To all the words I’d tell you.
I’m the one struggling
But you always made yourself the victim when it was me who needed attention, apologize, comfort & to support me.
Temptation & triggers
Have no meaning.
You never cared to look after me.
It wasn’t something you’d have to be 24/7 about.
You never questioned your negative actions & how that’ll provoke me.
You never cared until
A Relapse
Meant I Used because
I wanted to get high.
Finally You show importance.
Not in the way where your concerned if I’m ok & hoping that hit didn’t cause harm.
Concerned to where you stood by my side & talked on why it happened & what can we do to prevent it again.
instead , a relapse means
Talking **** to me , making me feel bad , blaming me, making yourself feel like I betrayed you
Feeling so angry saying I don’t love you & love that more.
You abandon me & go m.i.a
When you were the cause of why i couldn’t handle feeling hurt etc
I remember when
Relapsing made me feel guilty & so bad because I failed you & disappointed you.
I remember When
I’d tell you I’ll never be honest on my sobriety , confess or hand over paraphinillia .
For me to do the opposite of what I swore I’ll never do.
All because it killed me to lie & hurt me to see you stress your mind on doubts if I’m clean or not.
All For what ?
For you To talk **** to me when I confess about relapsing, for you to call me drug addict & insult me calling me Druggie tweaker etc
When I’d Hand you things
Etc
Me Being honest to you & open with my recovery only
Damaged me more.
What I gained wasn’t support.
It was money being thrown at my face telling me to go get high.
Calling me drug addict in many insult full ways.
You made a joke out of
my struggles.
You’ve never been there for me.
How far the meaning & value of relapse once meant.
A relapse now means nothing to me when it comes to you.
Being true to you
Only back fired.
You use it as leverage
To insult me more & have negative things to reply.
“I wouldn’t know, you kept
it from me before” etc
Nov 4, 2018
Nov 4, 2018 at 1:38 PM UTC
Open up your eyes realize
Everybody out to get you sin through
Ya body mind and soul take control
Don't let the ******** bury you
Take a sip of this tangeray
To calm you
Picture your adversaries buried
Restin' with the rest of the dead
Puffin' **** clock Gs til.my eyes bloodshed
Look in my eyes tell.me what you see?
Ya see a nigguh down for the Revolutionary
Most see an early cemetery I never worry
God's on my side but I was put on this earth for suicide
Can't hide from the pressure
Since I'm.human I'm.prone to feelings
I mentally prepare myself Cuz I'll be murdered in cold blood
From a bunch of thugs
Naw! not street thugs I'm.talkin' DC thugs
They stay lurkin' in the dark
And there I was
Chillin' suddenly I seen a spark
Eyes flash quickly death roads ahead
Will I struggle and toggle to survive?
Or will I let the crossover thrive?
On me my soul wants to be free
Damage is done so theres no more saving me
Its time to go done being bounded on hells shoulder
Tryna find a heaven but I'm.stuck in this boulder as my body grows colder
I'm shell shocked
I thought I told ya this is the ballad of a dead souljaaaaaaaa!!
Ballad of a dead souljaaaaaa!!
Dec 16, 2014
Dec 16, 2014 at 9:51 AM UTC
i crave so badly to sleep with you. and i mean that in the most innocent way. i want to sleep with you, but not in the sense that our bodies are naked and we make love in the mess of my sheets. i want to sleep with you and and learn the pattern of your heartbeat, the rise and fall in your chest when you breathe, how you move in the late hours of the night when you dream.
i want to sleep with you and roll over to find your body beside mine, if at 3 AM i wake from the habit of missing you. i want to sleep with you and i mean that in the most innocent way.
Aug 18, 2014
Aug 18, 2014 at 1:50 AM UTC
You have been through this before, the very same old song is playing and you are dancing the same moves
The same words have been spoken, you are still reacting the same old way
Yes you have been through this before, and nothing has changed.
They looked at your helplessness, they saw the waters gather speed in your eyes making ready
As they rushed down your cheeks, they looked away and washed then not away
Naked as you were, no one dared to cover you up.
Words were spoken, promises made, hope given, faith instilled, a better tomorrow promised
Yes, they heard them, they watched as you delved deeper into their web of lies
And smiled at their expertise in the ways of the tongue.
Showers of love they seemed, yet only a tenderizer for the next hard landing
Never softer, nor sweeter, ever damaging, heart breaking
But
You have been through this before, the very same old song is playing and you are dancing the same moves.
Jul 7, 2015
Jul 7, 2015 at 4:59 AM UTC
to the brave warriors
who reach deep within
their souls
turning darkness into
something beautiful
and whole
to the emotional empaths
who feel things
deeply
speaking their truth
wildly embracing
vulnerability
to the poets
who self-doubt
fearing they’re
not worthy:
the world would
not be the same
without your journey
May 18, 2020
May 18, 2020 at 12:13 PM UTC
i don't need promises or to discuss the idea of forever, maybe someday, but not now. and if you need honesty, yes, i have always been terrified of love. although, for the first time i find myself wanting now, this moment, my right hand in your left. i want our love in the rawest form, our hearts on the line, even with the knowledge that this could save me or completely drown me. i want you to hold me as if letting go would shatter every fiber of my being. i want to know what makes you whole when you feel empty, all the secrets you keep tucked away under your skin, and why you keep them there. i want to hear the stories of every scar that covers your body, if you cried when you got them. i want to hold your hand when 4AM comes and you've had another nightmare about your father. i want persuasive kisses (god it works each time) and morning breath whispers of "five more minutes" when i wake up to the sound of my alarm to leave. my love, my eyes have grown tired of searching and would not mind being set on you. (is that like saying forever?) for the first time, i am letting down my barriers that separate us, i want to fall and be caught.
Sep 23, 2014
Sep 23, 2014 at 10:14 PM UTC
Im a Drug addict.
Who Replaced there substance.
No more Crystal,
You became my new ****
I grew an addiction
Following obsession.
For you to love me.
I was addicted
To doing everything
To get 1 feeling in return.
Your love .
I let myself get walked one.
Kicked , tossed , Used.
I let you treat me at your like.
Today your nice
tomorrow your mean.
You gave me attention & love
At your convenience.
I was ok with it.
Even though it was all tearing
My heart apart
I let you Play me.
Betray me, lie & fool me.
I knew you Were bad.
You’ve done nothing but cause damage to my heart, soul & mind.
You cheated .
Emotionally & mentally.
You Abused me.
Emotionally & mentally.
The pain you’d cause
Was so Harsh
I considered suicide as
my way out.
To end the reality
Of what we really are & Forget that invisionsed a fantasy.
Of you being my Prince Charming.
Who’d treat me like a princess giving me nothing but love & reasons to smile & feel happy.
Seeing you worser than ****
your Real , You treated
me the way I feared .
“I don’t want a relationship,
I don’t even want my heart to get broken .”
I gave you reasons why
Examples ,
What’d you do ?
Everything I told you
I did not want someone to
put me through.
Sep 20, 2018
Sep 20, 2018 at 5:00 AM UTC
For never felt like a being
But in a glimpse, I felt like an happy child
Catch me not angels
Save me not my creator
From this rare gift of life
For my heart now cries and craves for Eve
Drunk by the liquor of fate
Driven by the nature
into the mystery of love
Light to the soul
Which makes man weak
To resist, my last thought
For the bond is too strong to fight
Afraid, it may lead me 9ft to the ground
Always want your warmth lips on mine
Your cold breath on my neck
For, whenever nature disappoints you
I will be your superhero , saving the day
For when you are asleep
I will be awake, wide open
Like a Guardian angel
For you are a star to be kept jealousy
For u read me like the Reverend reads the Bible
For I shall expose my demons to you
But this fear I fight might prevent you
From seeing me perfectly
For am in my jungle, painting pictures
Shedding tears, from my past pages
Too nervous to continue the journey
But it seems you know it all
Catch me not for I have
Fallen in love for the first time
You are mine
. ...... Inspired by J. Cole
Song.... She is mine prt 1
Album .... 4 ur eyez only
Cc @Kemba Mark
Sep 8, 2017
Sep 8, 2017 at 6:35 AM UTC
[Intro]
These eyes are healing for me,
and I aint paying no fee
i dunno what you seek but babe
it aint in me
trust in what you want
and in time
it'll give you what you seek
all the darker days will
help you overcome and let you breath
Nov 12, 2020
Nov 12, 2020 at 2:58 AM UTC
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Oct 31, 2018
Oct 31, 2018 at 1:32 PM UTC
Oceans could boil at my whim,
Fish could wish to walk instead of swim.
Angels could fall if fall they would,
And demons ascend if rise they could.
Restless spirits can rest if rest is wanted.
Freed from earth and those they haunted.
Kiss of fire,
Heightened desire.
Smouldering to my core,
Power untamed and power raw.
Illuminating darkness with my will
Soothing tides till tides stand still.
Goddess caged,
Truly enraged.
Loosening bonds which bind reality,
Watch as humans reduce to brutality.
Then to the Mother they turn to again,
Return to the Earths womb and be reborn again.
Jul 8, 2017
Jul 8, 2017 at 6:05 PM UTC
I let go
I lied to you, said I'd stay
Then I left anyway
Here I am
Wishing I had stayed
I've come back and found you gone...
where did you go...
I walk the streets again
But now...
With no hand to hold
Jan 9, 2014
Jan 9, 2014 at 3:56 PM UTC
You will lose her.
Drugs will take her.
It’s no game.
She’ll be manipulated
To loving dope again.
Be aware
Take procaution .
Every relapse
Is a step closer to losing
Her self again
Her prospective will turn .
Her views and thoughts
Will twist.
All good she believed in.
The positivity she spoke On?
Will be forgotten.
She Will Lose herself.
Drugs will Take her.
Are you prepared to let go ?
It’s no game it’s no joke .
Jun 27, 2018
Jun 27, 2018 at 4:29 AM UTC
One gram, 1 day.
Need to slow down,
line after line.
what exactly am I trying to feel?
obsessing over chopping till fine dust.
spending all the time emptying
out more & more.
trying to feel something.
This isn't my Poison.
Its a replacement,,
subtitiuting my cravings.
Overdose is posible with anything.
am I over doing it?
trying to feel something.
can't tingle ****
it's upsetting.
I hate it
though here I am..
Aug 22, 2019
Aug 22, 2019 at 7:17 PM UTC
angrily reminds me.
He wasn’t raised to show affection.
His reason to why he’s
Never caring or “loving”.
In a mean why
Telling me He’s Sorry
He can’t respect or show How much I mean to him .
Angrily tells me
He’s Sorry He can’t
Show me the “boyfriend qualities” id wish he had.
His excuse to never Making me feel special, appreciated, wanted is
He has no experience being in a real relationship.
Angrily Tells me
To go find someone els
Who can treat me the way I want.
Who Can do all the things
I ***** that he never does.
His excuse?
Once again..
He has no type of experience
Never had a real gf.
Angrily tells me
He has no experience showing someone how much they
mean to him .
How he doesn’t know how to treat a real girlfriend..
All of this gives him the right
To act So cruel.
All of this Is why I’m
Forced to forgive him for all of his hurtful actions.
I’m forced to be understanding
To always accept this.
Clueless on how to act in a relationship.
Mind blank of how to be loyal , Kind , caring, Honest & respect.
Well Learned To
Lie betray hate & be disrespectful
.
Clues on how to show love.
Be amourous , give affection.
Well educated on how to ask & insist for ****** pleasures.
He’s clueless on how to
make me Feel Special.
Well educated to make me
feel like I’m nothing .
Says to not expect
Teddy bears , surprises, Gifts.
He doesn’t know how .
He knows how to
Vanish for days give
Unread texts & missed calls.
Parents showed no love.
So he’s not experienced.
Parents didn’t show him To look & ask for ***
But he’s fluent In Talking & Making his way through those gates.
Jun 24, 2018
Jun 24, 2018 at 2:30 PM UTC
My Heart is broke,
I glued the pieces back together.
Then it happened again,
Once more I glue the fallen pieces.
My love
still goes on for him.
No matter his destruction.
His wrongs stay unspoken.
My bucket filled of tears
is always left unnoticed.
No matter the storm
I hang on tight.
Made a commitment
To loving him long .
It’s hard.
Balancing out the lows
Leveling out the highs.
puzzling everything
To make all his
Broken promises
Appear right.
It’s been a journey ,
A troubled trail
Interfered Within my own life.
It’s been chaotic,
Seeing where I’m
Stepping now ?
Has me empty handed.
Putting all my time
& energy into this
Tornado I call love ..
Aug 22, 2019
Aug 22, 2019 at 8:11 PM UTC
The light retreated as he stepped forward from the shadows
Recoiling away like the hand from a poisonous snake
Casting the world in a semi-luminous glow of a crimson washed patina
He struck a bell seven times to announce his arrival
With every strike the sound became less pronounced; distant
Until at the end of the seventh, ghostly silence reigned supreme
As he moved the air started to sizzle, the energy overwhelming
An oppressive heat boiling the air itself into a darkened conflagration
The stench of decay followed in his footsteps, putrid and wretched
Life held its last breath begging with eyes pleading for lights return
Nov 1, 2017
Nov 1, 2017 at 9:46 AM UTC
Sooner or later .
Yes, your finally RIGHT.
What’d you assume?
That’d I’d be dumb forever.
Eventually I’d Start
Opening my eyes .
Viewing Reality
In all different sides.
Did it not ever
Occur to your lil mind?
That one day I’ll be tired
Of chasing your heart,
Just to Play another game of your
“I’m sorry, I’ll change”
It was a process.
To reach this top mountain.
Dealing with my reality
the problems i avoided coming
all back at once.
Catching up with life.
Carrying Heavy weight
Of Drug Abuse.
hate, pain, sadness.
Hopeless & unworthy
Beliefs.
Being let down by the one
who committed to Forever Protect
and care for my heart.
Years of Tears
Finally Took its Told.
Constantly crying & still
being left alone.
Always abandoning me
Leaving without notice.
Many of those escapes
You came back with something
for me to feel less worthy.
Betrayal , A lie.
Truths have always made there
ways back to me,
Of your fun nights.
To be continued ..
Aug 29, 2018
Aug 29, 2018 at 4:52 AM UTC
You once told me.
'Not everyone thinks like you'
I Now know.
what your phrase means.
how its applied to our life.
I Loved you so much.
I did everything to be in good terms.
I was crazy for you baby ...
FINALLY
I understand why'd you leave.
My Feelings for you were deep.
you did not feel nothing for me.
which explains why
you'd leave me alone in the cold
crying, sobbing, hurting.
Explains why You didn't care
if you hurt me.
my feelings did not matter.
you felt no sympathy.
you had zero importance for my emotions.
that's why you'd walk away freely..
I was never anybody to you.
not even with the intimacy did I matter...
you used me.
got tired so youd find ways to leave.
get me off your back to welcome a new female...
Nov 22, 2018
Nov 22, 2018 at 3:55 AM UTC
I’m sorry
I couldn’t Stay dedicated.
Couldn’t get off drugs completely.
I’m sorry
My Drug use impacted
My present with you.
That I couldn’t manage to Keep my problem just to myself.
Knowing What I became
Brings a lot of disgust to your face.
The last thing you ever imagined..
Was to end up with a druggie.
I’m sorry
You were cursed & Brought the opposite of what you desired.
I know I’m far off
Your Type & what your
attracted to.
Im so sorry.
I feel bad because
You never made yourself aware.
I wish to go back in time
& Explain to you What Being an addict was & How difficult I’d become Once I’d get sober.
How my mind won’t function accordingly, how much of a mess I turned into.
I wish to go back & Explain well to where you’d back off me.
You never Expected
That my problem was really going to be a big deal ..
I know You wish to have
Been Inlove with a previous girl.
I know you’d wish
Your 1st love turned out to be
The one you’d marry.
I’m so sorry you ended up
With A terrible downgrade.
I’m deeply sorry
For not being stronger.
I held strong Through all your insults & Hurtful things
You’d tell me,
I held strong when I
was just your toy
Being told
“we will never be anything”
I held strong through all the rain & thunder you put me through before we got together.
I assumed
Being your girlfriend
Would change Everything.
We’d start fresh & be
happily Inlove.
That’d I’d be able to let go
Of all the hurt & move on
Having a strong loving
bond with you.
We Then Got Together
I even committed to
forever leave drugs.
Because I was serious on making us work & leaving behind all things that Made us impossible.
A new chapter
Filled with smiles & laughter
A fresh start.
So I had thought.
Little Had I known
Getting together
Wasn’t the answer to
Anything.
Nov 4, 2018
Nov 4, 2018 at 1:44 PM UTC