Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
sobroquet Oct 2013
I'd last about an hour as a clerk inside a store
invariably I'd shoot my mouth off
about someone's daughter dressing  like a *****
or making comments about the dreadful things  consumed
which would include a good 99% of the people in the room

I'd eventually end up getting my lights punched  out
after  *******  someone as  a fat ***  undiscerning lout
or cracking  some aside regarding what comprises that crud
and making faces of revulsion "you'd be better off eating mud"
ewwwww, you really eat that stuff?
this store should be sued for selling such bluff

children with diabetes, a third of adults obese
the courtesy clerk dies a little  for lack of surcease
line after line of vapid consumers
mindless knee-**** impetuosity belay the rumors
what's an adulterant, what's a filler?
propylene glycol alginate, yum yum
sorbitan mono sterate, shut up and eat it, its fun!
I can't even pronounce it, much less do I  care
need I be a scientist to enjoyably savor fare

Go ahead and poison yourself
the quirky clerk exclaimed
its ever so clear you're stupid and lame
stay mired in your pig-headed muck of  ignorance
you're exactly what they want
another brain dead consumer
a regular culinary savant
stuff  your face with no remorse nor heed
no worries, the clerk of little courtesy knows your need
he'll limply wheel  out your cart of miserable choices for you
and wise-crack some snarky rejoinder
then promptly get  beaten,  black and blue
The silent musings of an overly sensitive, audacious,  contemptuous, impudent puritanical bag boy.
Ayeshah Apr 2010
never felt a body so hard,

muscles

rippled every inch of you,

your hands so strong,

molding me to you,

caress deeply massaging my body.

i feel you on top of me-
solid hard pressing down,

touching me here mmm and here.

playing with my pressure points,

dancing over my egregiousness zone.

you've seductively molested
my mind while secretly
tantalized my pleasure zones,

your a walking talking aphrodisiac.

sleek like a dark panther,

flexing your biceps
as you work my body,

teasing me as your pelvis
and manhood softly grinds
up on my buttocks,

where your half sitting.

i feel you rise swelling and all
i can do is lay here guessing,

thinking impure thoughts
of what we could be doing,

your half siting on me,

knees bent
close to my waists,

my arms at my sides

Sorry baby i had to touch you,

feel your power as
you stroke me seductive.

Sweet gentle ****  masseur  

your
technique has me craving  

your hands on my umm hmm,

I want to now feel you between
me
flexing as you probe in me deeply
with your
"Afro"disiacs

flex with in me as you move
in sync with me, harder oh please

YES!

caress my velvety walls as my own muscles

constrict & contracts pulsating from your

*******'tics touch and tense up.

Sir  please, Sir  move deeper
while i move with you.

that's what I want toy say
&
beg of you to do,
thats what I'm thinking

but I wont say a thing.

I'm going to lay here on my stomach-

enjoyably mesmerized  at the care you take

with me &  your expertises

as you massage peace back into me.

relaxing me while i lavishly day dream

of us becoming more then just  a 1 hour  session

of  You the sensual  Masseur

&

I the lustrous  wishful thinking client

whose mind  has already taken
a leave of absence

Only when it comes to you.

Mmm Day Dreaming.......


Always me Ayeshah
Copyright © Ayeshah K.C.L.N 1977-Present YEAR(s)
All right reserved
CJ M Jan 2017
My dreams dance around me like shadows dance around fire pits: swishing from side to side in so seductive a manner that I am mesmerized by their show. She is a dream to me. Dancing her body of lust around me in an effort to taunt me into submission, and I dare say I'm willing to submit to her.
There is an energy that she lets off that chokes my breathing when I speak and slows my reaction when our hands touch, for she is the kryptonite to my superman, and I willingly dive into her piercing crystals.
From the flick of her tongue, I know she is willing, come, butterfly, I will teach you how to soar as covers fly over over your body and your mind races with the pleasures I intend to lay upon you. Tell me that your mind doesn't get lost in the lust and I will tell you how much I'd love to prove you wrong.
Oh how I long to taste your seduction. On so many an occasion I had fantasized our connection as you paraded in front of me, dancing like shadows around a pit of fire. And I would savor the sight and enjoy the release of my love that ensued once my mind became clearer and my surroundings become empty.
My young goddess of lust. Might I savor your flavor and enjoy your skin like I wish? Perhaps one day when the timing is right, I shall take you down like I have countless times before in other realities and give you the taste of pleasure you pry me for.
Maybe one day I'll pull your head back by the hair and inhale your fragrance as I begin to devour you slowly and enjoyably for the world to see. Maybe one day I'll have you lie in front of me and open yourself for my exploration.
And on that day, I want you to know that you turned me into a beast of lust as built up like the seed I would eject into you.
You have turned me into a creature addicted to your skin. Addicted to your tongue. Addicted to your lips. A monster addicted to your ***.
You shall see my broken bonds as I tear your clothes, you shall see my shattered chains as I ram you with the anger hidden inside my brain and the frustration hidden deep inside my soul represented by the bite of my serpent.
And I shall abuse you.
Perhaps you'll respect me once you get a taste of the hell I had been through chasing you. Maybe when your back is bent, legs gaping and body frozen stiff by the fear of my lightening strikes will you see how willing I was to please you.
And not until I tear you apart will my flame of evil lust be extinguished. Not until your body is red from my pinches, not until your breast ache from the pull of my lips, or until the bite marks I leave you with begin to ooze your sweet nectar of red tears, not until then will I let you go. Even then, I may lick you clean once more and send you into the world a purified being.
You are a dancer in my eyes. A dancer of shadows and a product of the pit of fire from which you were birthed. But once I have your skin in my clutches, the only fire you'll recognize is the fire in my eyes as I make you moan the world away and the smoke brings tears to your eyes.
This isn't necessarily ****** per se, but it's literally the fact that It is rather um.... abrasive, I suppose. It felt weird writing, so that means I'm doing something right.
Countdown to Armageddon precariously hinges
   potential apocalypse outcome, mere smattering days away
if the brazen, fierce-some dragon doth don
   trumps presidential throne -
   ships with whistling  Dixie missiles at bay
will be synchronized with aerial bombardiers
-    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -   -    -
   to parlay a view to unleash nuclear weapons on cue
destroying a vast swath of flora and fauna,
   and most life forms (inn oh cent), but pay hefty due
to assuage the aggressively cruel, enjoyably
-    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -   -    -
   growling at his goalie indubitably
   kick *** mindset worse than dengue fever will ensue
a combustible domino effect fueling global horror -
   analogous to kindling tinder logs smoke
   the color - jetblue streaming up fireplace flue
-    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -   -    -
witnessing sovereign magnum opus trans
   forming much of animal and plant life into flakes of goo
far scarier than any macabre production
   dreamt up by human frightful scenario and no hero
she ma to rescue self or other from deadly debacle,
-    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -   -    -
   nor any safe haven such as a cool igloo
forsooth complete annihilation will far surpass
   any prior world war, no one will be spared,
   neither gentile nor Jew
which total mortal kombat, and attendant laying waste
-    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -   -    -
   organisms livingsocial instantaneously cremated,
   where ashes spread dispersed faster than Kudzu
rendering world wide web fetid, offal, and putrid
   far more noxious than the common loo
yet even this general description falls short to where mew
-    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -   -    -
tinny sans hardy species (according to Google search);
   such as tardigrade, mummichog, and cockroach
decimating, heaving, leveling, poisoning
   every cubic inch of Earth evincing voluminous vaporization
   extant eradication emphatically nixed, punctuated, and radiated
-    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -   -    -
   pulverization eviscerating the bowels of mankind,
   where nary a survivor could weather and withstand
   hollowed out no mans land bereft of sustenance or water
   where seeds of white lily when coalescence
   of oblate spheroid birthed, nursed, and weaned new
-    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -   -    -
life especially proto **** sapiens
   and subsequent kin grunting with ah and oew
fast tracked primates, yet inherent within genetic coda
   (perhaps poison ingredient bubbled
  within primordial soup) - steeped quantum mechanical pew
-    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -   -    -
tar nation housing crucible-
   analogous to planetary size mortar and pestle) queue
sans predestination, where rue
brick, dogma, and fealty honoring justice slew
-    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -   -    -
by paws of one cancerous, fractious and idolatrous Lothario,
   who opened Pandora Box (rigged shut tight) thorough
lee rendered civilization a footnote
   of cosmological history and universal view
-    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -   -    -
BUT.... eligible voters can choose alternate
   (Democratic) candidate -
   the majority will exhale a collective gustatory whew
and allow, enable and provide continuance of the human zoo!
N R Whyte Feb 2019
Ice
I knew it wouldn't end in fire;
We burned
Too fast, too enjoyably, to suffocate
In flames.

I found the scab, the source,
Small and round and secret.
Incapable of leaving it to heal, I finger the edges
Nervously until the blood flows
Cold and jealous and foreign and unforgiving and slow.

A tipping point we can't reverse out of,
We're frozen on the event horizon,
Empty like the air in February,
The oxygen burned out from our explosion.

I am only left with regret and this
Sense, clear and dry and freezing, that I've walked
Too far north and lost the sun,
Though clouds still part in the distance and wave
Toward the open spaces
With fingers unfurling in unnatural curls.

I claw back to calm from
Calamity and speak, knowing I have listened
Too deeply to words meant for other ears - words that do not tell
Me what to say in return - I am raw.

I stand at the edge of mercy,
Abrupt in my humanity,
Suddenly losing feeling in my toes.
J J Oct 2019
Trying to catch a slice of thought process;
Like capturing lightening in a jar
            Only to smell it's exhumes.

It's a blessed freedom, to release
  an experience; an imitation of the world,
or an imitation of how others wrote and expressed
    the world, and at constant conflict to lose it's voice.

It can be enjoyably difficult (the best hobbies
    usually are) or flow smooth as blood thru vein.
   Pulling blood from a stone and unexpectedly
    heaving rainbowy rainwater can be it's own virtue--

    An idea caught half undeveloped
Only to shed cocoon to join the white blankness
And forever tarnish it's history--

A gorgeous priveledge in it's constricted freedom
(As is existence,although we're too modest to admit it)

Writing is a piece of you and you belong to the human race,
and doubleedged a sword as that certitude is,
Writing is a piece of us left to the world.
Writing is forever
to parlay a view to unleash
   nuclear weapons on cue
destroying vast swaths
   of flora and fauna,

   most inn no cent life forms
   will pay hefty due
to assuage aggressively
   cruel, enjoyably

   growling goal, and indubitably
   kick *** mindset worse
   than dengue fever will ensue
a combustible domino effect
   fueling global horror -
   analogous to kindling tinder logs smoke

   jetting up fireplace flue
witnessing sovereign spookiest
   magnum opus - trans
   forming much of animal
   and plant life into goo
(especially if special prosecutor Robert Mueller let go)
far scarier than any macabre production

   dreamt up by human
   frightful scenario hero
she ma (paltry in comparison)
   will rescue us from deadly debacle,
   nor any safe haven such as cool igloo

forsooth thee annihilation
   will far surpass
   any prior world war,
   no one will be spared,
   neither gentile nor Jew
which all out total mortal kombat,
   and attendant laying waste

   organisms livingsocial
   will instantaneously undergo cremation,
   where flecks of ashes will spread like Kudzu
rendering the world wide web
   fetid, offal, and putrid
   far more noxious than the common loo

yet even this general description
   falls far short to where mew
tinny, sans hardy species
   (according to Google search);
   such as tardigrade, mummichog, and cockroach
decimating, heaving, leveling, poisoning

   nearly every cubic inch of Earth
   evincing voluminous vaporization
   extant eradication emphatically
   nixed, punctuated, and radiated
   pulverization eviscerating bowels of mankind,

   where nary a survivor
   could weather and withstand
   hollowed out no mans land
   bereft of sustenance or water
   where seeds of white lily when coalescence
   of oblate spheroid birthed,
   nursed, and weaned new

life especially proto **** sapiens
   and subsequent kin grunting
   with ah and ew
fast tracked primates,
   yet inherent within genetic coda
   (perhaps poison ingredient bubbling

  within primordial soup - steeped qua pew
tar nation housing crucible-
   analogous to planetary size
   mortar and pestle) queue
sans predestination, where rue

brick, dogma, and fealty honoring justice slew
by paws of one cancerous,
   fractious and idolatrous Lothario,
   who opened Pandora Box
   (rigged by bobbies shut tight) thorough
lee rendered civilization a foot note

   of cosmological history and universal view
where if one eligible voter
   chose alternate (Democratic) candidate -    
   the major will exhale a collective whew
and allow, enable and provide
   continuance of the human zoo!
My heart beats a more brighter tune.
A light shines inside of my soul.
My ventures, to a new way on the seas of existence , have been lit.
Sails bursting with the higher winds of promise...
They breath life, newer energy, into my stride.
Walking down the  streets to the proper destinations,
I enjoy the travels.
Along the way, I see those who have bumped into me, and I smile.
I sit down.
My Anchor drops at the port of brighter  Conversation.
The lessons and wisdom  that I have been   freshly taught,  These lessons learned,  teach me better ways of working my ship.
These solutions, that  are the light in my mind, are writing a better map. Destinations to yet another stop.
In my travels.. in my life..
I  have freshly discovered, newer ways, in which to better improve, and to savour....my travels.  
Such revelations,  have hit me like a hammer.
The exchange of ideas.
Such are like precious  Gold.
Beautiful stories shared.
Defined as "Treasures."
They have made me richer,than any bank, in existence.


Shaking hands, as newly born family members,  we part ways.
Temporarily....
Until we meet again, or as these new "family members"" volunteer to add to my crew, we shall meet again.
As  My ship sails ,still,Onwardly...
Avoiding  icebergs of hopelessness.
Never sinking to the bottom, of Life's Seas,to The depths of Helplessness....
The sun still shines.
The sun sets.
As the moon shows his smile, I see even his white and bright light.
I smile back.
A captain at his wheel. At the Helm.
I am determined to venture the islands of new found treasures.
To add to my  life's wealth.
I earned my haul. A sailor with hs crew.

We sail together on a ship that we have  created , together.
Life is a rough sea.
We learn how to tame her.
We are all sailors who must learn to navigate waters less calm. To find a better route.
To these "ïslands of treasure."
Landing on such, when we set anchor, we explore the lands, and make our "rest stop."
We shall give and also  exchange,  such "treasures of experience."
The finest Gems, handed down to us from those "Villagers," that we have met along our voyages...
Now , with our steps walking, in paces ,together... at the same stride.
We pull anchor and set out for yet another island.
A  brighter map to lead us to  "äfter life's " destination, we read the routes; carefully.
Sailing onward until we reach such an end to our life's journey,
we enjoy songs and drinks of cheer.
As we sail, on a cruise ship made from  the hearts of my "family,"
which I have let into my soul, and I have so enjoyably  created.
Such travels start adding to my crew, of my life's ship.
To grow closer to one another
Rather  than us  being the one forcing themselves to be alone.
Is being an open listener.
It's in  true understanding that makes me feel, proud,  to be a part of the many, rather than the one lost, in ones' self, and  alone.
We are all flowers slowly blooming to show our true colors.
Slowly growing past the shallow end of life's pool..
and diving, one after another, from the highest point into the deepest end.....
Of a pool into waters so deep and so very enjoyably cool.....
From a hot and blaring sun...it feels so nice...to escape...
To offer another, thirsty for companionship, an ice filled drink in a full cup....of joy and laughter....
Of the best of me to share...
I grow with and care for all...
The "wonderland flowers" (which  Allow this "****" the chance to grow from what was a "dandelion") and who then  blooms, into being seen as a rose...A fellow "Flower."
As Roses, We might have our thorns...
But we wake up after the damage of blame, shallowness and scorn.
This world might be a rough place, now...
Expanding our garden, for the other blooming flowers, is in the true nature...to leading even our youngest once lost, into life's bigger and larger gardens or oceans..

Of a society to grow from a dark patch of weeds..
Children especially... we need to them help to  grow.
Into a flower ,more beautiful than us elders...
the beauty in all of us shall, surely amongst them, invite them in..
As true support is the fertilizer that they have been free to enjoy, appreciate, and to truly have grown with, and loved to have  known.
For ,after us  older flowers wither and die...
the young seedlings (that are  sprouting and have watched us shine in color....In life's garden....
They shall have  known..
In which truer  which way to in which to  point for the warmth of sun, needed...
rains to water them and to cool them as they grow...
, and how to survive and to duck from the "steps of the bad-souls that try and smash them along the way..."
Their misguided feet missed our young flowers...

They shall be tall and grow even more beautiful...
As we gave them equal in a world where such, beauty is from our truer hearts..
and our life's cups, should remain, always full.
The garden shall then be made to spread "world Wide.."
As we grow
freedom for tearing down, a once too-tall and unneeded, garden wall.
courtesy prescription laxative AMITIZA

and found (me) zee papa pooped out,
thus embarrassing communiqué I post,
a reasonably rhyming poetic shout
to air grievances
concerning outsize bowel movement
hoping (fat/slim chance)
Mike Rowe happens tubby about,
though shadow of doubt
he will avail himself.

**** eyes zing thee
nightly dump for yesterday
January 31st, 2022 - whereby
plying plunger in vain, cuz suction
barely helped obstruction give way
I nearly lost me life and limb oy vey
oh my dog, the same asinine outcome
which spurred poet to get underway
matter of fact, a replay

of excretion almost occurred today
and thus an attempt to describe
a tragicomic scenario
regarding bowel movement size of subway
an urgent message to maintenance person,
yours truly must relay
overflowing ***** nearly
found yours truly quay

king, yet impossible mission arises to portray
unsightly situation, the
juvenile elements of harried style
I hate to overplay
odoriferous subject matter
nsync with constipation
since laxative delineates,
expedites, facilitates,... née

posits heavy load emanating out ******
quite amazing what smelly waste exits out me
necessitating captain my captain
to signal emergency mayday
posterior end, a dime size orifice,
which malfunctioning sphincter muscles
one moost never be lackaday
'though kids and adults

laughed back in the day,
if and/or when Danny Kaye
tactfully poked fun
at such critical ****** phenomenon
equally important as a jackstay
to keep afloat body electric
'curse with auxiliary accouterments interplay
analogously precise as

Swiss made timepiece
said system responsible
to expel ****** toxins
upon which sitting on porcelain throne
one can softly utter hooray
thankful to experience relative pleasure
until one becomes feeble minded,
whereat sixty plus shades of gray

matter allows, enables, and
provides enjoyably foray
into the bathroom, which entranceway
hoop fully not barred nor off limits
cuz that primitive urge one best not delay
lest one requires lower
gastrointestinal intervention
especially if blocked up

***** matter turns to clay
unless of course one doth
cause damage and betray
respect toward well
oiled human machine
exercising and eating healthy
avoiding backside skeleton musculature issues
yes... I reckon during twilight years
control over bowels doth slip away.
and found (me) zee papa pooped out

**** eyes zing thee
nightly dump for yesterday
July 8th, 2020 - whereby
plunger helped obstruction give way
I nearly lost me life and limb oy vey

oh my dog, the same asinine outcome
which spurred poet to get underway
matter of fact, a replay
of excretion almost occurred today
and thus an attempt to describe

a tragicomic scenario
regarding bowel movement size of subway
overflowing ***** nearly
found yours truly quay
king, yet impossible mission

arises to portray
unsightly situation, the
juvenile elements of style
I hate to overplay
odoriferous subject matter

nsync with constipation
since laxative delineates,
expedites, facilitates,... née
posits heavy load emanating out ******
quite amazing what smelly waste
exits out me

necessitating captain my captain
to signal mayday
posterior end, a dime size orifice,
which malfunctioning sphincter muscles
one moost never be lackaday

'though kids and adults
laughed back in the day,
if and/or when Danny Kaye
tactfully poked fun
at such critical ****** phenomenon

equally important as a jackstay
to keep afloat body electric
'curse with auxiliary
linkedin kickstarting jazzmatazz interplay
analogously precise as

Swiss made timepiece
said system responsible
to expel ****** toxins
upon which sitting on porcelain throne
one can softly utter hooray

thankful to experience relative pleasure
until one becomes feeble minded,
whereat fifty plus shades of gray
matter allows, enables, and
provides enjoyably foray

into the bathroom, which entranceway
hoop fully not barred nor off limits
cuz that primitive urge one best not delay
lest one requires lower
gastrointestinal intervention

especially if blocked up
***** matter turns to clay
unless of course one doth
cause damage and betray
respect toward well
oiled human machine

exercising and eating healthy
avoiding backside skeleton musculature issues
yes... I reckon during twilight years
control over bowels doth slip away.
Aging baby boomer
no longer fit as a fiddle
accumulating extra adipose tissue
around the middle
ain't no impossible mission
whence thumbs I twiddle
to shed unwanted
weight methinks exorcise to unriddle.

Call to action necessitates
yours truly to acclimatize,
calling fitness trainer
whereby honed toned physique
(tubby synonymous with Adonis – ha)
benefits begetting courtesy  to aerobicize,
nsync dumbbells compliment exercise,
whereby brutal daily grueling
regimen will also comprise
boot camp rigorous discipline

strength to pilot (minus paunches)
shouldering, managing, hoisting crucifix sunrise
to sundown will non verbally advertize,
verily intolerant to chastise,
hence no bully best better mess
mine mean mien guise
will enjoyably capitalize
zing might equals right to authorize
self defense without need to apologize.

Back in the day, I
presented pitiful sight
self worth equated on
par with botanical blight
buffeted along boulevard
of broken dreams
depressed body language
bespoke head to foot
encompassing enfeebled edifice complex
scrawny measly gumby,
hokey pokey height

how I presented such sorry spectacle
courtesy excellent twenty/twenty hindsight
analogous to an emotional black hole,
never exhibiting courage to fight,
rather yours truly immediately took flight
and/or stood dumbfoundedly
in imitation of deaf mute wishing to alight
bajillion miles away, versus
active stance to fight
preferring the incognito
guise pitch dark vested gentry

donning luxury invisible
accouterment shade o' midnight
proffered, though natural camouflage
infrared crosshairs nonetheless did sight,
when scaredy cat sacrificial scapegoat
experienced his sealed fate, a heavy smite
upon me noggin scrambled outlook
seeing stars courtesy topflight -
(bare in) strong arms hoodlums
brandishing razor sharp dagger

type like fangs able, eager,
(think) bloodthirsty 10,000
homicidal maniacs
ready and willing to bite
simultaneously trumpeting
hate speech to excite
curious madding crowd
glomming to render airtight
any possible safe escape,
yours truly turned white
as a sheet.
ConnectHook Apr 2023
Smoking Mistress Nicotine's Sister in an upright bent poker tonight.
Upon unzipping her can and lowering her inner lining there is a pronounced initial note of excited unlit tobacco. The leaf is very moist, almost slippery in lubricity and takes the flame like a 22 year-old ****** on her honeymoon. Pack me hard, I want a long smoke tonight, she murmurs as I look for a match. She arches up, desiring to burn and be transmuted into holy smoke. Upon relight, there is a distinct taste of female sweat and pheromones. Initial room note is comparable to that girl at the 10th grade spring dance when you snuck in some apricot brandy. Partway into the bowl, the sophomoric fumblings become more enjoyably experienced and there is a shared sense of tobacco torpor. Deep in the bowl she asks if you will smoke her for the rest of your life. Yes, you answer, breathing heavily.

A smoldering jungle of desire:
Where you discern her smoke, there's fire.
Pulsating tunnel of delight,
She swells again upon re-light.
Her rounded bowl accepts my flame 
Excusing her from any blame
.

After the last spasmodic puff of smoke dies, there is a lingering pleasure which pulsates in the cooling bowl and makes you want to smoke again. I rate this tobacco very highly indeed.
PROMPT 24: write a poem in the form of a review
Though rather tepid,
     this aspect of my life,
     I **** sitter tubby cool
and hoop fully ye
     (unknown reader
     will quickly warm)
     e'en if thee option
     to stay abed

     might cuz ya to drool
though this re: son hubble
     mister rhyme stir
     (in this instance) enjoyably
     playing the role
     of "FAKE" fool
barely breaking a cerebral sweat,
     sans minimally exerting

     mine mental capacity,
     (which got set
     to cruise control)
luxuriating at exemption, space/
     time continuum junction,
     and option to arise
whenever I want, joyfully cries,
sans this pleasure to exercise

allowance to avoid "rat race,"
     (though mine circadian
rhythm usually jostles
     me (Joe Cur)
     awake mid morning,
     when dream state flies
away Chuck Norris lies,
no explanation to include

     above name sake),
this will be my oh
     ***** chew weary,
     boot before thy demise
lemme summarily apprise
circumstances (moost NOT
     envied by other gals and guise)
cuz receiving social security disability

(predicated on major panic attacks,
     social anxiety,
     and schizoid personality
     disorder NOT tubby confused
     with schizophrenia) defies
explanation former severe

     debilitating, harrowing,
     and lacerating symptoms
     decreased with medication,
     yet the better (or rather
     worse) part of my life.
The demagogue reincarnate
feels gifted to reign supreme
captivates, glorifies, lauds,
renounces, yawps extreme
views bellows dogmatic fulminations
in an attempt to redeem
stolen 2020 capital one bid.

Which hunter (biden his time)
will reap grim statistic when citizens
cast their ballots for president
in the popular vote (viz 2024 election)
unbeknownst one or the other
lesser of two evils will accrue
majority votes after
ramping up mudslinging
both candidates violently stirring cauldron
proffering toxic brew
powerful blend to spellbind public

elixir ration to parlay a view to unleash
vengeance laced with hate speech
triggering doomsday clock to strike midnight
when nuclear weapons
get loosed out their silos on cue
destroying vast swaths of flora and fauna,
most innocent life forms will pay hefty due
to assuage aggressively cruel, enjoyably
growling goal, and indubitably
kick **** mindset
worse than dengue fever will ensue

a combustible domino effect
fueling global horror –
scenario of webbed, wide world I eschew
analogous to kindling tinder logs smoke
jetting up fireplace flue
witnessing sovereign spookiest
magnum opus – engendering, jump/kick
starting, and transforming much of animal
and plant life into goo
(especially after special prosecutor
Robert Mueller let go some years back)

far scarier than any macabre production
dreamt up by human
frightful scenario hero
she ma (paltry in comparison)
will rescue us from deadly debacle,
nor any safe haven such as cool igloo
forsooth thee annihilation will surpass
any prior world war, no one will be spared,
neither gentile nor Jew
which all out total mortal kombat,
and attendant dystopian landscape

laying waste organisms livingsocial
will instantaneously undergo cremation,
despite Georgia grand jury courtesy
indicting former President Donald Trump
that rained down
upon his head and up the kazoo,
where flecks of ashes will spread like Kudzu
rendering world wide web
fetid, offal, and putrid
far more noxious than the common loo
yet even this general description

falls far short to where mew
tinny, sans hardy species
(according to Google search);
such as tardigrade, mummichog, and cockroach
decimating, heaving, leveling, poisoning
nearly every cubic inch of Earth
evincing voluminous vaporization
extant eradication emphatically
nixed, punctuated, and radiated
pulverization eviscerating bowels of mankind,
where nary a survivor, especially foreigner

could weather and withstand
hollowed out no mans land
bereft of sustenance or water
where seeds of life
and white lily when coalescence
of oblate spheroid birthed,
nursed, and weaned new
life especially proto **** sapiens
and subsequent kin grunting
with ah and sheepish ewe where
rambunctious fast tracked primates,

yet inherent within genetic coda,
(perhaps poison ingredient bubbling
within primordial soup - steeped qua pew
tarnation housing crucible-
analogous to planetary size
mortar and pestle) queue
sans predestination, where rue
brick, dogma, and fealty
honoring justice slew
by paws of one cancerous,
fractious and idolatrous Lothario,

who opened Pandora Box
(rigged by bobbies shut tight) thorough
lee rendered civilization a footnote
of cosmological history and universal view
where if one eligible voter
ideally chooses alternate
Democratic, but hands down
Republican candidate will clinch nomination,
witnessing elephants to stampede,
the majority will exhale a collective whew
and allow, enable and provide
continuance of the human zoo.
for the umpteenth time
during spate to sit scrawny buttucks
on porcelain throne id est
videre licet toilet bowl...
with toxic water brew threatening
to overflow onto the floor,
and hence found yours truly (me)
immersing himself in the holistic experience
for the pure love of bucket flushing
since applying plunger to no avail

found me able, eager, ready and willing
to whoosh upon a star to enlist
the entrepreneurial daring doo doo  
of eldest offspring to design a corkerasp,
and found (me) zee papa frankly
zapped, pooped, fatigued, et cetera out,
thus daring poster boy afflicted
by recurrent bouts of constipation
to share embarrassing communiqué I post,
a reasonably rhyming poetic shout out

to air flatulent grievances
concerning outsize bowel movement
hoping (fat/slim shady chance)
Mike Rowe happens tubby about,
though shadow of a doubt,
he will avail himself
**** eyes zing thee
nightly dump for yesterday
September 2nd, 2024 - whereby
plying plunger in vain, cuz suction

barely helped obstruction give way,
I nearly lost me life and limb oy vey
oh my dog, the same asinine outcome
which spurred poet to get underway
matter of fact, a replay
of excretion almost
occurred earlier today,
and thus an attempt to describe
a tragicomic scenario
regarding bowel movement

the size of subway tram,
an urgent message to maintenance person,
yours truly must relay
overflowing ***** nearly
found yours truly quay
king, yet impossible mission
arises to portray
with unsightly turgid prose
and cons of situation,
the juvenile elements of harried style

swiftly tailored, I hate to overplay
odoriferous subject matter
nsync with constipation
since laxative delineates,
expedites, facilitates,... née
posits heavy load emanating out ******
quite amazing what
smelly waste exits out me
necessitating able linkedin line
O Captain! My Captain!

I signal emergency mayday
posterior end, a dime size orifice,
which malfunctioning sphincter muscles
one moost never be lackaday sic cull
though kids and adults
laughed back in the day,
if and/or when Danny Kaye
tactfully poked fun including that girl
at such critical ****** phenomenon
equally important as a jackstay
to keep afloat body electric

accursed with ****** ammunition
auxiliary accouterments interplay
analogously precise as
Swiss made timepiece
said system responsible
to expel ****** toxins
upon which sitting on porcelain throne
one can softly utter hooray
thankful to experience relative pleasure
until one becomes feeble minded,

whereat sixty plus shades of gray
matter allows, enables, and
provides enjoyably foray
into the bathroom, which entranceway
hoop fully not barred nor off limits
cuz that primitive
urge one best not delay
lest one requires lower
gastrointestinal intervention
especially if blocked up

***** matter which turns to clay
unless of course one doth
cause damage and betray
respect toward well
oiled human machine
exercising and eating healthy
avoiding backside skeleton musculature issues,
yes... I reckon during twilight years
control over bowels doth slip away.

The Essence Of A Corkerasp.

(which fictitious object contrived
by my then twenty plus year old
third year college student,
(who will turn twenty eight
on December twenty second),,
but SHE would never admit
to birthing such an offal bit of drek.

The essential name arose
from preschool, predicated,
precocious person, and the words....?

Whenever constipation a pain in the ***
just maneuver this lightweight
metal contrivance made of brass
no matter if anybody
considers this action crass
apply corkscrew motion
up the alimentary canal
to remove human waste,
which most likely
will be thick like petrified paste

stuck deep inside
bowels of sphincter muscles
and solidly encased
causing severe cramps
within lower gastrointestinal tract
inducing one to wince nonstop
from being ***** matter packed
and no amount of primal groaning
doth loose this hard fact,
nor does imagery of freed ****

ease formidable **** plight,
no laughing matter
despite how absurd
squeezing does nothing
even applying all inner might,
thus necessary to incorporate
un-natural intervention to un-clog
****** blockage + uncomfortable bloating
swelling **** the size of a hog
disabling bare derriere

ease to stand let alone jog,
yet tis essential
per extricating what feels
like one swallowed a log,
which could presage demise
of sufferer, whereby epitaph
twill induce impossible
eulogy spoken language
where tongues wag in Prague
every ounce of effort required to bend

over gingerly affixing
plunger end of device
to business of rear end
best accompanied in tandem
with close companion or friend
this ***** deed done
dirt-cheap trick will ideally rend
rock solid excrement to roll and crash
(on par traversing highway
to hell) soundcloud, I

without fail regularly out the ***** send
upon bathroom floor
possibly inducing tsunami
seismic waves less or more,
whereby toilet bowl water will pour
over the sides akin
to white caps near sea shore
without doubt making
gluteus maximums extremely sore.
courtesy the comfort of his mancave,
I (a mutated batman wannabe)
doth prattle and stump
and display wide whirled webbed
and variegated tail feathers
(also known as rectrices) of mine,
cuz in actuality true bats
as quoted verbatim from Google
“lack tail feathers,
but they do sport tails that vary in structure
and can help with classification.

For example, vespertilionids have tails
that run to the end of their uropatagiums,
while molossids and rhinopomatids
have tails that extend beyond the membrane.

These species may use their tails
to feel their way around
when backing into crevices.

Other bats, like emballonurids,
have tails that are shorter
than the membrane and rise above it.

They belong to the order Chiroptera,
which means "hand wing".

Bats have long fingers that form wings,
and a thin membrane called a patagium
that stretches between their finger bones.

This membrane, along
with their many movable joints,
makes bats agile fliers” - end quote.

After aforementioned introduction  
regarding why I proudly pride myself
with rare genetic anomaly
that evokes rumpled stilts skin,
I not only feel analogous to
a mysterious gnome-like character
from the German
fairy tale Rumpelstiltskin,
but also parade mutation
like an out of season mummer,
who originally posted
the following lines
of this poem crafted August 15, 2023.

That unnamed demagogue reincarnate
feels gifted to reign supreme
captivates, glorifies, lauds,
renounces, yawps extreme
views bellows dogmatic fulminations
in an attempt to redeem
supposed stolen 2020 capital one bid
and seal lock, stock and tight as a barrel
the upcoming ⁦election Tuesday,
November fifth, 2024⁩.

Which pseudo/quasi hunter
chomping at the bit (biden his time)
will reap grim statistic, when citizens
hopefully cast their ballots
for the first female and biracial president
in the popular vote 'videre licet' 2024 election)
unbeknownst whether Kamala Harris
the dark horse candidate will accrue
majority votes after
ramping up diplomatic repartee
against mudslinging toward her,

whereby her opponent violently stirs cauldron
proffering toxic brew
powerful blend to spellbind public
elixir ration to parlay a view to unleash
vengeance laced with hate speech
triggering doomsday clock to strike midnight
when nuclear weapons
get loosed out their silos on cue
destroying vast swaths of flora and fauna,
most innocent life forms will pay hefty due

to assuage aggressively cruel, enjoyably
growling goal, and indubitably
kick **** mindset
worse than dengue fever will ensue
a combustible domino effect
fueling global horror –
scenario of webbed, wide world I eschew
analogous to kindling tinder logs smoke
jetting up fireplace flue
witnessing sovereign spookiest

magnum opus – engendering, jump/kick
starting, and transforming much of animal
and plant life into goo,
(especially after special prosecutor
Robert Mueller let go some years back)
far scarier than any macabre production
dreamt up by human
frightful scenario hero
she ma, or nog a saké (paltry in comparison)
will rescue us from deadly debacle,

nor any safe haven such as cool igloo
forsooth thee annihilation will surpass
any prior world war, no one will be spared,
neither gentile nor Jew
which all out total mortal kombat,
and attendant dystopian landscape
laying waste organisms livingsocial
will instantaneously undergo cremation,
despite Georgia grand jury courtesy
indicting former President Donald Trump

that rained down as Stormy Daniels
upon his head and up the kazoo,
where flecks of ashes will spread like Kudzu
rendering world wide web
fetid, offal, and putrid
far more noxious than the common loo
yet even this general description
falls far short to where mew
tinny, sans hardy species
(according to Google search);

such as tardigrade, mummichog, and cockroach
decimating, heaving, leveling, poisoning
nearly every cubic inch of Earth
evincing voluminous vaporization
extant eradication emphatically
nixed, punctuated, and radiated
pulverization eviscerating bowels of mankind,
where nary a survivor, especially foreigner
could weather and withstand
hollowed out no mans land

bereft of sustenance or water
where seeds of life
and white lily when coalescence
of oblate spheroid birthed,
nursed, and weaned new
life especially proto **** sapiens
and subsequent kin grunting
with ah and sheepish ewe where
rambunctious fast tracked primates,
yet inherent within genetic coda,

(perhaps poison ingredient bubbling
within primordial soup - steeped qua pew
tarnation housing crucible-
analogous to planetary size
mortar and pestle) queue
sans predestination, where rue
brick, dogma, and fealty
honoring justice slew
by paws of one cancerous,
fractious and idolatrous Lothario,
who opened Pandora Box

(rigged by bobbies shut tight) thorough
lee rendered civilization a footnote
of cosmological history and universal view
where if one eligible voter
ideally chooses alternate
Democratic, but hands down
Republican candidate will clinch nomination,
witnessing elephants to stampede,
the majority will exhale a collective whew
and allow, enable and provide
no end to speculation about
decimation about me, you
and continuance of the human zoo.

— The End —