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 Mar 2014 Vanessa Gonzalez
i
always
and forever,*
he said to her.
she believed it.
Everything they say,
Everything they do,
Everything they spout,
is a lie.

I know because the voices in my head told me so.
I spend most of my time
Locked away in my room
Writing metaphors that could never be
As beautiful as you

I try to catch your eye
With my words
But they could never do you justice
So I know this'll never work
But I keep trying

I try to capture your beauty
Using only thoughts that come to my mind
I know you find it hard to trust me
I don't blame you
Almost everything I say is a lie

I try to twist my own words
But I end up just twisting my tongue
And though I know it'll hurt
I try my hardest to be someone
That you could trust

And I
Wanna make you smile
But I don't know how
And I
Wanna stop lying
To your face
But I can't get a single truth out

Everything I say is a lie
This is about loving someone who only knows lies about you
You
When I close my eyes all I see is you...

As I lie in bed I imagine you there with me, holding me while you slowly tickle my back with your heart beat and our shallow breaths the only sound I can hear.

I feel warm...safe
        
I just wish it wasn't a fantasy and you were really here with me ♡
Please be happy.  
Your smile is beautiful            

Please dont cry.  
Just dry your eyes

Please dont leave me.
Because I wont survive without you
                                                              
P­lease dont lie.          
Because I want to trust you

Please look at me how you look at her.
Because it seems as if shes the only  ******* earth

Please hold me in your arms.
Because I want to fall alseep happy for once

Please never say good bye.
I cant take that pain

Please stay with me.
Forever and ever

Please be mine
Because I'm already your's

Please love me.
just please...love me
It's hard for me to think of how fast I fell in love with you
I fell deep into a unrequited love with you
definition of unrequited love : "it's like drowning but you just won't ******* die"
Love is suicide,
Loving you is emotional death
Hyperventilation,
Cardiac arrest

There exists no life without you
I am crippled by the absence of your warmth
Struggling to be free from thy love
Whilst chained to the ground.
he rides his bike through woods that swallow his inner most desires
he has the urge to be a servent to people with upside down smiles
he knows what he knows is a curse
he knows that knowledge is pain
he wanders streets like a tourist
he sits and cries when no ones around for no reason  but to let out emotion every once in a while
he tries to be like the same, but cant because of the huge question mark on his forehead
he talks to women like if they all had a special place in his heart
he's sorry, he just wants people to feel cared for
he makes up scenarios in his head to make himself laugh about the what if's
he kisses his mother before he goes to bed because he's scared of her not waking up the next morning
he prays for death before anyone in his family so he won't feel the pain of losing a loved one, he's lost a few already
he cant take much more honestly
he doesn't trust anyone, but gives second chances
he walks school hallways listening to uplifting music to feel superior from everyone else
he daydreams of a futures that will maybe will never come
he talks to people for experience around human culture
he plays piano to calm his anger when his knuckles can't take anymore wall punches
he writes to make worlds he can live in when he's in solitude
he listens to loud music to block out screams of attention everywhere he goes
he reads the bible for some kind of hope in words
he knows the maze in his mind but cant get out even if he tore down all the walls
he's got a problem with love, a big one
he sleeps with a ****** incase Satan wants to **** with him when he sleeps
he prays before he closes his eyes to see galaxies in the dark incase illusions ****
he believes in aliens because he doubts coincidence in world wonders
his name is David, and he aspires to be nothing but an expression
When she recieved her first 'A', and hung it on
the frigde, they called her Alexandria, and
they chanted the name with pride.

When she tried on make-up for the first time, and asked
her father how she looked, he simply nodded and said
you look beautiful, Alexandria, though she knew he was lying.

When she saw her first naked boy, at a party out in province,
she questioned whether to stay or go. All he had to do was call
her Alex, and her mind was fully made up.

When she smoked her first cigarette after going to bed with
that boy she'd met moments prior, everyone called her Lexi,
whispering it between moans and drags from cheap cigarettes.

Now, on most evenings, outside the local bar, she stands on the
corner, pacing back and forth, and asks herself if that test still hangs
on the fridge, and what they'd call her now...
idk, just felt like writing this...
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