when it rains,
i sometimes stick my
arm outside
the confines of my room,
close my eyes,
and try counting
the number of kisses
the rain makes
with my outstreched arm;
i never keep count,
i just keep thinking
of the attiring
trees and other plants
with my own,
inverted set of lungs.

when i fall,
i don't just fall in love.
clumsily, i stumble
down and then i land

awkwardly and graceless,
stuttering utterly at the foot
of a handsome man,

blundering an apology
out of breath, ineptly
embarrassed about
my shaky hands,

clambering
to dust myself off,
all the while, i try,
desperately, to stand

wishing i could disappear,
i rise as quickly as i can
waving off any helping hand

so he doesn't see
how incredibly stupid
i must be

I am not heartless,
life just taught me
to use my heart less.

I don’t always allow my heart
to make choices for me.

Life is saddened by love,
because when those
you care about die,
it hurts more than
if they were a stranger.

That’s why I always say,
love is not a happy journey
where the sun always shines.

It can be a barren landscape
wasting away with fattened pigs,
and chickens who lost their feathers.

Love can burn like the hot sun
in the Mojave Desert.

It can drink your blood
until you’re ready to pop.
Leaving you to die
from a broken heart.

© 2017 Amanda Shelton

I love not gently,
subtle my heart is not.
Aggressive
Unwielding
a force,
but not a storm.
[it does not pass]
Spring, declining to wither,
as winter settles in our bones.
Vintage in nature,
but too fragile to be traded
between hearts & possibility.

Grind it up
Roll it up
Spark it up
Smoke it

Inhale, Exhale
Don't waste it
Inhale until you feel it in your eyes, your mind and your chest
As you exhale, let your worries leave as well as your stress

Inhale, Exhale
Don't be so serious
Have a little fun
Play with your smoke
Round your mouth and blow some o's
Inhale through the right pipe and Make the smoke leave through your nose

Inhale, Exhale
Don't stand up, Just sit down
Sink back, Lay back
Close your eyes, Relax your mind

Inhale, Exhale
Enjoy the temporary serenity
Enjoy the temporary silence
Cause after it has ran it's course
It always comes back

*******
for turning into murky water
with riptides keeping me in
when i know
crystal blue seas
run just below the surface
and they're calm
where i would willingly swim

s.s