There we go again me & my pen
teaming up together real late at night
deciding on how these thoughts I should write
the ink begins to leak just a little
as it slowly starts to trickle
out sentence after sentence I begin to scribble
Scratching words out & writing different ones
only to scratch out that & back to the original it goes
it just fit there better
& hopefully I don't forget a letter
it's just a rough draft, so whatever

Which story shall I expose
So everyone who reads this knows
how my life truly goes
it's better that all those reality shows
There's no directors or cameras that follow me
Although, if that was true, they'd have some great footage to look through
because there's just about nothing I don't do....
From late nights to road trips to see the other half of our crew
Memories we definitely make & not a **** thing we do, we fake
We give it 100 & not a single break
We never think twice & don't believe it't any kind of mistake

So my pen is excited every time I pick it up
it can't wait to write my latest story & who I attempted to corrupt
as it flows through my pages
telling about all the ages
& my crazy peace signing rampages
honestly me & my loves belong on movie stages
but that's just a thought I wanted to share, until it all changes
then my life will be up for some big rearranges

You won't ever truly, truly understand my stories you see
You can say you completely understand them but that's a lie, since you are not me
So I definitely know that can't be
my experiences only are understood by a few
the ones who were there with me & did it too
They know what we've been through
the memories we make, bring us together, you have no clue
the best of friends forever, tight together, a special bond, stronger then any glue
all because of trust & fun, plus all the **** we've done & STILL have to do
No one will ever change that, not even YOU!

So let my pen do it's work
& don't be a total ****
because when it's done, it's the notebook pages your eyes will lurk

For that split second I'll let you in my head
& you can see what I do & why I stay up instead
Now can you see why I don't always go to bed
So hopefully everyone will enjoy what they've read
& always remember me when I'm dead.....
Promise me, NOT ONE tear will be shed
just remember me for the words I said
& how I was such a great friend...
I did live happily ever after & have reached my end..

Eventually I will but right now I am just writing as if it has been years & years ahead
so just pretend
&  your imagination, for a moment, to me will you lend
If you want to make  sense out of my words, it is something I do highly recommend

.....Soooo do you want to know something rather funny I heard
& know for a fact is completely absurd
this did I hear from a friendly little bird
Who I can trust is true to their word
there's this boy I use to know really well
Who's running around with all these stories he's trying to tell
about me being so horrible & I'm going to hell
he must have tripped & hit his head when he fell
Telling his new "lady", a  lady she is not, not in any state
all these lies about me when we used to date
it's just ******* & drama he's trying to create
I'm not sure what I did to him for me to receive all this hate
I personally thought I was great
I am just glad things changed to rearrange my fate........

......Meanwhile....
Another conversation was being held....
"Honey!", he calls "I have a date night arranged."
"We can talk & post stories about my ex, I know it sounds strange...."
....BUT you're my shoulder to cry on, he thinks to himself, I shouldn't have ever replaced
I wish I could retrace......

....Now....I have this random thought hit, just out of no place
They must sit around their fireplace
Seeing how much they can say to destroy my name's good grace
Hmmmm..I guess it's my face
he cannot seem to erase...

Let's get back to a happier state
where you can see why there wasn't a need for a debate &...

before I was in too deep & it was too late
this is what this idiot said
I swear he's mental in his head
who knew this is where our split would've led
& surprisingly don't you think, since I was dumped, it would be me in which the lies were spread
instead the table has turned
& it's me they want to make sure gets burned
but they're dumb & to ignore those who don't matter is what I've learned
So their little game will get nothing out of me
& I really have no reason to be concerned
& no need for comebacks or smart remarks to be returned
I'm over this ****
& I find it hilarious too, that he's saying I used to hit
Apparently I was abusive & violent
like I beat him??... is that what he meant
because anybody who hears this will surely know it's completely ridiculous, wonder how much time with that he spent
making me sound like such a bad ***, what a compliment
definitely he's lost his mind, it's a few screws in which he seems to miss
he's also quite confused, since it was me he called useless
& how I was always lazy
but now you can all see it wasn't me who was crazy
& for whatever reason it may be
That **** talking & lied about me
is what he decides to do is beyond anything I can see
I have moved on with my life
& at first the pain hurt like getting cut over & over with a dull knife
It was  just time to finally end the strife
I happily continue on & that is all just a story I tell starting with this.... It all began once upon...
... upon a time where I was "in love" but now it's long gone...
there was a new girl he had gotten
but strange it was me he still had not forgotten
To me he wasn't someone I thought about often
All these lies he's getting caught in
make him look even more & more rotten
& even his mother, the one he could trust in
she lost her faith in little boy because he continuously tells her to him she means nothin'
But we both know who, in the end really matters
& to ignore their endless chatters
when their world comes crashing down & all they have shatters
it's maybe then they'll finally get what it is they both are so desperately after
'cause from me & his mother, all they'll get is points & laughter
so go ahead & spread all your vicious lies
doesn't bother me at all, go ahead with all your tries
the more you hate on me, the more & more I become more wise
I guess I'm just always on your brain, well isn't that a surprise
I do have one thing to say
as I go about my each & every day
I'm glad things happened this way
to show me, I'm way better off if I didn't stay
So listen carefully to my words that I speak
& they may come as a shock
the time has definitely passed on the clock
can't you hear it's tick, tick, tock?
So that means GET THE ******* MY ****!!
Before I ******* hit you with a ROCK!!
& then I'll leave your body outlined in chalk
So you better be careful with the **** you talk
& if you see me out, it's the other way you better walk
even though it's flattering that it's me you want to stalk
but it's getting ridiculous
& there is just one more thing I want to confess
I'm so much better now without so much stress
I'm just sorry you are now a complete mess
Now maybe you can see, it was always you who was worthless
& that I was actually quite priceless
BUT this is what you wanted, I guess
I'm much better I must say & my friends all are glad I'm not ending up hopeless
So when people ask me "are you moved on?" I can HAPPILY say "YES!!"
because I'm now filled with peace & happiness

Another one to add to my record books
I've watched yet another day's sunrise
but today's mash of day to night to day run on is slightly bent
Maybe it's how the clouds & sky looks
OR MAYBE my peace is on one of those really awesome highs
But to me it feels like the weather is trying to repent

Alone in my mind, I frequent there quite a bit
I'm a V.I.P. member, platinum access
Party of one, that reservation will never change
Routine time after time I'm left standing, too crowded to sit
&& knowing the outcome every time, yet still I habitually return to the mess
Some great times come out of there, I know it seems strange

My attention is rather easy to get but you won't have it long
Distractions catch me quick, lost in another disorganized thought
Loud endless static echo's from the constant ruckus
Which can be more annoying than a jammed doorbell's "DING ****, DING ****"
Focus is nonexistent with all the commotion, which is quite a lot
BUT I am not becoming one of the hopeless

Alone in my mind, always working overtime
Day or night doesn't matter when, it doesn't take breaks
Untangling it can sometimes be a tedious mission
Worse than trying to get directions from a mime
Hours could be lost by how long it takes
& for a split second, eyes blind to reality with empty vision

Now inside trying to sort & arrange my thoughts & word flow
From what makes sense & what needs to get real
But just like quick sand, it never fails
I get stuck in the same place
To my notebook's pages, it refuses to cooperate & correctly go
But it's not always such a big ordeal
Occasionally the words nice & easily fall into the correct space

Alone in my mind is where I usually can be found
When I'm up with the moon & stars
& all the house is fast asleep
There I sit with notebooks all around
With pages of scribbles about life & how it scars
But that's where my soul speaks & my emotions run deep

My mind won't quit
I hate when it does this ****!
It's sleep I lack
Typical problems of an insomniac

Writer's problems wouldn't you know it
3am & I'm a ******* poet
But it's not a surprise
.....that's why I can't seem to close my eyes

Words do not a writer make
Nor poems nouns or prose
But the heart that breaks for breaking sake
Beyond calling Rose a rose

It's not the nouns or adjectives
Or strings of sappy lines
It's seeing love where nothing lives
And seeing darkness shine

A writer sees beyond the words
But sees the great divide
Between what heart says and what is heard
Never satisfied

A writer does not fill the page
With words that others need
But the page the page is the stage
Where their emotion bleeds

Of the things I think a writer holds
You may disagree
But if your heart is moved to words so bold
A writer you may be