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My Dear Poet Aug 17
She slept upon my AirPods
she felt every song
I dreamt about the future. I believed that I would be in a place where love wasn’t something I was finding but something I had found. In my 22 years of existence, I never thought that I would have experienced such hatred for somebody.

It may come as a shock but that somebody is you.
I descended. I became one with my demons. I poured holy water all over my skin trying to find some sort of remedy to free myself from you. I kneeled to the floor and repented my sins. I became incoherent. I swam in my own tears and drowned in despair...isn't this what you wanted? see me crash and fall and break to the point of no return.

I thought I was what you wanted...
I tried to be the one for you. I tried to fit all of your requirements. I tried to be perfect. I tried for you.

Whenever you wanted ***, I gave it to you...hour after hour, minute after minute, second after second.
Your arms under my legs as you **** me against the wall grunting into the depths of my skin.

My arms wrapped around your neck keeping me balanced as I stare out into the open space, lost and confused in my mind...

what am I doing?

Your movements becoming harder,and faster as you start to reach your peak. My eyes starting to close as I feel your breathing becoming more rapid.

"**** KYLE!" Is what you say to me...your body coming to a halt as you release your fluid inside of me.

I unwrap myself from you and watch as you walk to the bathroom. "Such a great ****. I love ******* you." you shout. The running of the water penetrating my ears.

That's it.

Wash myself from you. Wash the deepness of me away.

And then there's me. Sat on the bedroom floor, still engulfed in your scent and surrounded by your sweat.

that's just it.
Imagine loving someone so deeply knowing they don’t love you back...yeah I did that ****
How am i supposed to say
what i want is not attention
it's reassurance

what i want is not sympathy
it's support

how am i supposed to say
i am battling..
with myself.
How am i supposed to find the right words and not sound wrong
To be loved is to be stripped down to your core. Until the truth is exposed and you're an open book.
And then be accepted.
Not for the persona you created, or the fake meaningless words you use to impress, not the clothes you wear, the way you part your hair, or anything of the sort.
But to be accepted in your pure state of self truth.
That is love.
accept me
I spout nonsensical filler words in every sentence I speak.
I say things, to say something, without Adding any meaning behind it.
Because my most exposed,
Raw thoughts,
Would make this group go silent.
I'm not accepted,
Unless I wear this filter.
It filters out all insightful and Substantial conversation.
And replaces it with a slop of words,
That make me
Feel sick.
I'm sick of saying something that means nothing.
Keiya Tasire Jan 17
Long ago she lost the ability to cry.
He thought her so hard
When she turned her face and walked away
As through she did not hear
His gesture say, "I am drawn to you.
Is something here to explore?"
She walked away without looking back
Then stopped.
Looking straight ahead.
He thought of himself, a man of power
So he followed her ,
Lured with the intrigue to conquer

Yet, she did not desire to be conquered!
She was only uncertain
How do I express "I only want to be truly loved."
He came to her. She resisted. He conquered.

She sank in despair, only more withdrawn
The uncertainty about life looming.
Does love even exist?
Or is it only my illusionary butterfly?
She walked away.
Vowing not to ever be conquered again.

Time passed.
She licked her wounds.
She grew. She healed.
Mending her once festered soul.  
No longer did she draw nor desire conquers

Now a golden bright sun
Roaming the universe  
Circling as a bright new star.
As she roamed into a sea of stars
One came beside her and said,
"I'm drawn to you.
Is there something to explore here?"
She replied, "Maybe so."
So they danced among the other stars
Until they found a rhythm of their very own.
And a path along the universe
To call their very own.
Without knowing our true self, relationships are difficult at best. Yet,  there is lots of hope and opportunities to grow together in the process of getting to know each other. If this can be done. The longer term commitments have an opportunity to become more durable and strong.
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