I think that you should know something.
The truth is... I'm scared.
Not scared of this virus.
I start my senior year of High School next year.
That's what I'm scared about.
At least the Class of 2020 got to experience what I might miss.
I don't want to miss it.
My last time at band camp.
My last time at the band picnic after the first week of band camp.
My last time marching at the competitions
My last time marching at Seacrest field
My last time marching on the muddy band [football] field
My last time marching at a football game
I don't want to miss the marching season.
Everything that makes the school year fun
Could be gone in a heartbeat.
That's why I'm scared.
I don't want to miss homecoming
The awful pep rallies
Playing Keyboard in the Basketball Band of Doom
I'm scared that I am going to miss everything I have loved these past 3 years
I'm scared that I get to be a part of the family that I found in choir and band.
This is what the Class of 2021 might miss out on.
Football Games, Pep Rallies, Homecoming, Volleyball Games, Basketball Games...
WE could miss it all.
I wrote this last night crying and I felt that I couldn't post it because I wasn't in a good mental state last night because I figured out that we might be not going back to school in August and I was scared... TBH I'm never in a good mental state but it's fine
I'm not really the girly type.
No roses and ribbons,
Big hoop earrings
Or pretty ball gowns.
It's just not me.
And you know that's not me.
Everyone knows that's not me.
But I'll surprise everyone
At homecoming in a dress.
Blue, almost black
Cocktail with lace
I feel girly already, ugh.
But that's okay
Cause it's worth it,
You're worth it.
At homecoming in a dress
Looking good, feeling good.
Because I won't get a prom.
So with you, only with you
I'll make the best of this.
While I'm at homecoming in a dress.
The dewy-eyed moon smiles upon me.
It knows I've returned home.
The mountains lined with termination dust
hark the ending of summer.
Soon the clusters of evergreens
will be coated in snow,
just as they were last winter.
The snow falls flake by flake.
It's in no rush to hit the ground;
it will melt once it does.
The same type of peace
befalls my quiet life.
Slowly, I return to old ways.
Like footprints in the snow,
the tread of future days
looks much like those of the past.
...and then there are these flowers:
flush with fragility and coloring.
What if I could be them...
utterly mortal, yet dazzling?
What if I could bloom
with nothing to prove?
How would it be
to be like them;
perched on the tree
on a shimmering morning
so faultlessly sunny,
with the breeze...
Can I be them?
What are the credentials
or is it
a comprehensive lack of them?
Inspired by: The memory of and longing to be home, the true home that we have forgotten in our quest for extrinsic glitter. There are times we get glimpses of this home all of a sudden and we briefly realize that while the outer world needs us to prove our credentials to acquire its ephemeral objects, there are no such requirements to return to our sources, our true home.
Why do you lie?
When someones mean, why do you hide?
Hey Homecoming Queen?
Are you alright?
"I'm doing fine, just dying inside."
Did so good at hiding it for most of your life.
Look so good in the dress.
No ones sees your stress.
Dancing with your best foot forward.
Does it get hard?
Maxing out the credit cards.
Just making sure that they like you.
Do they like you?
No one's feeling sorry for you.
What if you let them all in on the lie.
Even the Homecoming Queen cries.
Hey Homecoming Queen?
How's things at home?
Are you still crying alone when that curtains closed?
Did your dad teach you to be tough?
Or did your mom teach you to sweep it under the rough?
Zip up the mess.
Wipe away the stress.
Put on your crown.
Does it weigh you down?
Hey, Homecoming Queen?
Are you alright?
I'm here if you want someone to stay the night.
Hey guys! I'm back from summer vacation. School has started. How fun. I wrote this with the help of a song called Homecoming Queen by Kelsea Ballerini.
the bittersweet homecoming
these telephone box blues
distance has humour
life does too
I can barely remember the year I fell in love
with love. She took me everywhere I wanted to go
and home was wherever she was.
I have detailed memories of when Love, fell
out of love with me. I sat in shock as she dropped
me off at my home. Who knew home could feel
like nowhere at all?
Memories that I still haven't forgotten.
I look at the maps hanging up on my wall
admiring the world for the best it got
yet i see
Poverty swell and trivial refugees struggle
and there are cardinal power wars
destitute crave for food shelter and cloths
O' why lord ?
"Its the beginning of the horror flick, my son
there are copious others , yet unaddressed and unresolved "
However i reckon
how simple it is to conquer despair hanging up on my wall
For today mighty fighter
stop and sleep a lil more,
cuddle your love and hold her a lil long
refashion your battle cry to cry of love
Shed tears its no harm
miracle will happen as you kiss her once more .
You are the puppet fighter, no doubt you are strong
they know your strength , they are foxy back stabbers brother
they'll aflame your soul ,
Don't forget you have love back home ...
he watches me from across the room
i fantasize a dance with him
my chest against his
moving in sync with his body
and as our dance would end
and i might confess him
my fantasy ends
and he dances with his queen
i sink back and remember he and i
were never meant to be