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vik Jun 12
it was so long and so long ago
  in a gloaming-lit room where the lamplight lay low,
that i, with the hand of a slumbering saint,
  summoned a spirit from water and paint.

no angel in heaven had garments so fair,
 his robe was of lustre, his crown made of air,
and his wings, they were tremulous shawls of the sea,
 and he looked; yes, he looked; ever rarin’ for me.

i knew not his name, nor the path he would take,
 but i dreamed him in silence, for dreaming’s own sake.
and i left him alone in the hems of the sky,
 where the clouds chimed gray and the years drifted by.

but o!—through the tombs where the sun-blind are led,
 he wandered, he wandered, the palette of dread,
till the Lord, in a hush, let His finger unbind
 the brushstroke from Time, and the thought from my mind.

and he fell like a stain from the hand of a heir;
  as dew falls unseen on the throat of the air.
with the sigh of a page that has turned in the gloom,
 he came to my door as if risen from tomb.

he remembered the lines i had drawn as a child,
 the blush in his cheeks, and the colors run wild;
his voice freed the sinners and demons from Hell,
 as though all the old noels had forgotten to dwell.

he bore not sacral swords from kingdoms above,
 but eyes that had wept through the ink of my love.
and he whispered—o Heaven!—he whispered to me:
 “i searched all the stars, but you painted the sea.”

now each day that i bide in the shade of his grace,
 the world is a shush when i gaze on his face.
for he walks with the mumble of chants that were true,
 the cherub i painted, who came when fate knew.

and though men may scoff, and though suns may implode,
 the colors still bloom where my longing abode.
for love, in its balm, is a sacred decree,
  and he is the seraph God borrowed from me.
🪽
MuseumofMax Jun 11
Oh to be loved by you

How could I ever be blue?

When you love me, how you do
When the time comes
When my heartbeats begin to fade
My eyes begin to flutter
I hope to see you there

Your floppy ears listen
Your crooked tail wags
Your smile grows wide
While you stand by my side
I hope to see you there

My best friend
My shadow
My furry soulmate
I hope to see you there
Forever in my heart 🐶
I’ve been collecting you  
gathering up all your inkbled trinkets  
as if they were mine to collect  
as if you were whispering to me again  
the secrets of your blue-green skies  
like electric pillowtalk  
  
my soul slips like broken  
sand shards  
back  
into you  
into hazy eyed illuminations  
heartbeats rhythming through  
our pressed palms  
and you almost feel real  
  
until my eyes unsquint  
until all your splayed treasure  
has been treasured and  
I am love-lost all over
I cannot love you but I do.  

I cannot hold you or feel you under my fingertips  

I cannot run my hand from your shoulder down your arm,  
slip my fingers into yours and clasp hands  

I cannot quench my lips with yours  
or taste you on my tongue  

I cannot feel your warmth under the sheets on winter nights  
or the cool of your breath on my neck in summer  

I cannot see you in the morning, hair tousled and sleep in your eyes  
or when you walk around the house so casually  
scant, pretending you don't know that it drives me wild  

I cannot find my world in you at the end of the day  
or quicken my heart when I hear your keys in the door  

I cannot wipe your tears or hold you when the world is broken  

I cannot share the joy and sadness in us both, as one  
who understands the scars on your arms and  
on your soul  

I cannot call your name in passion  
or for comfort in the middle of the night  
or see the promise in your eyes as the syllables tumble over my lips

I cannot hear your voice with its bubbly and sultry intonations  
whispering songs and secrets to me  
or get lost in it's sound for hours  

I cannot love you in my arms,  
So I will love you in poems and memories and dreams  
and sing a song for you in the silence
It seems that we were always destined  
to be made up of stolen moments  
Distilled seconds filled with the universe.  

In a hallway  
In hands clasped under a desk
In twilight whispers over copper threads
that stitched us together
In pools of street light and darkness
flickering through the windows of a bus

If I could choose one moment
to stretch out into eternity
god, it would be us

But in truth the grains of sand
that measured our length and breadth
were scattered few and fleeting

Forever looking in others
for what we were always destined to lose
you loved a boy  
and he loved you  
though he had loved before  
or at least, had thought himself to love before,
this was wholly of a different kind

the love he had before didn’t feel like this.
true, it had started off with heat and sweaty hands,  
as most loves do,  
but then it lost its brightness and became cold,  
something that ate away at the boy  
and however much the boy offered  
it took and took  
and never gave  
and wasn’t soft or kind

so the boy was left broken  
in more ways than he ever told,
in more ways than he even understood.  

but then you loved a boy,  
a boy who was broken  

and you were good, and beautiful, and true,
and your voice sang a love song that was only for him,  
and your touch made him fear that his heart would break
in the most wonderful way

and the boy loved the girl  
completely  

this love was warm and soft  
and air and breath and life and  
more  

all the boy wanted was to be
consumed by the girl  
just to be closer to her  
so that he was never apart  

and then it was gone.  

and the boy was confused  
because this love hadn’t changed,  
it hadn’t grown dim or dark,  
it was soft and full and fire  
and gone…

and it could not be the girl  
because she loved the boy,  
she had told him
In her honey whispers late into the night.  
the boy knew her words were true  
because she was good and true  
and because she had saved the boy  

then she was gone.  

and the boy was left more broken than before,  
the only thing left in the boys heart  
was the horrible thought, that perhaps  
he was not worthy of love;  
and it was horrible,  
because I believed it to be true
The world tilted, and there he was
Eyes flickering, dancing
a smile waiting to break
like a secret hanging just out of reach

Time folded in on itself
The air thick and still
so silent even the dust held its breath
The room a soft blur
muffled and distant
like I was underwater
All I saw was him

His hurt reached out
raw, trembling
a fragile thread pulling toward mine
We were strangers only on the surface
Beneath, something cracked open
silent wounds speaking in shadow

Inside me, a magnet pulled
urgent, wild, irrational
A voice that said
you must be near him

His voice was low and warm
a slow rhythm pulling me under
the kind of sound you hold onto
a beacon guiding you home

That night
my mind stole a picture of him
vivid, haunting
bathed in streetlamp gold

We held our gaze too long
not trapped
but willing captives
to a silence that screamed
everything words never dared

Something ancient woke in me
not gentle
but aching
It knew the absence before him
and mourned the loss
of any future without him

Still my soul leaned in
like it had done
in all our lives
before this one
adoration
deep love and respect
I adore you and
your creativity

passion
strong and barely controllable emotion
I am passionate about you
and your way with words

fondness
affection for someone
I am fond of you
and your smile

tenderness
feelings of affection
I have a tenderness for you
and your ability to
bare your soul to me
Xnarf May 26
An outreached hand to the depths of despair
A foreign warmth to thaw the frozen stare
The slumber breaks, the recluse now aware
You are there

Like moth to flame, a worship in bloom
Fixated. Yearning for your time to consume
All the darkness faded, that was to presume
Were it not for the demons that invaded the room

Stars aligned, brought within proximity
Hearts conspired, connected by affinity
Wired to your soul, craving for continuity
Golden opportunity squandered by insecurity

When the demons resort to intimidation
How can a fragile soul combat such confrontation?
High and mighty, they spoke of salvation
Here I crumbled in the wake of their devastation

All those nights awake, body numb, ever so tired
Endlessly looping what fate had conspired
Wishing for the strength that the moment required
All hopes and dreams once again expired

Forgotten, left to bleed along with time
Escaping the depths, an excruciating climb
Emerged, it’s clear that your path became sublime
Demons, for her sake I thank your crime

As the world was left to burn
You danced without concern
The void still whispers, aching to return
But memory arms me well to spurn

What might've been keeps me obsessing
I'd swear it's different now, but I'm just guessing
All I know is, though it's distressing
This curse of mine was your blessing.
And after all this time,
Im sorry.
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