I used to laugh and giggle
For no reason at all
I used to spit and expend,
Not caring how much you saw.
I was given food and clothes,
Without asking the type.
I would learn from anyone around,
Whatever the hype.
I would play on the grass
Without a worry for anything in sight.
I used talk to young and old
Without the slightest peek of a fight.
I used to not know,
How little it was that I knew
Now I wish I never learned,
Because I want to feel a laugh without reason
For that is the best reason of all.

You sit in front
Staring at once was
Contemplating your place
Among the swarming crowds
And the unfathomable abyss
Reminiscing about
The hurried sweat of summer
And the cold tang of winter
And the Jazz that seamlessly rolled
Days into years  
And decades into history books

I reminisce on this:
A time more filled with bliss.
When school is out,
And the children shout.
Our minds now worry-free,
We fill our hearts with glee.
I reminisce on this.

I reminisce on this:
A time that I do miss.
You can call it summer vacation,
When with no education,
We go to visit family
And maybe to travel oversea
I reminisce on this.

I reminisce on this:
A time of such remiss.
We forget responsibility,
And remember the ability
To go out, and have some fun,
But now, with it all done,
I reminisce on this.

Thanks for listening, though I'm only writing this because I've assumed you're filtering all my e-mails into your trash. Who can blame you?

I am remembering the time we went to Lost Bar and then walked around my neighborhood for awhile. It was Spring, wasn't it? 2013. It was one of the few times we had fun together after actually going out. I remember that we returned home and as I was walking out onto the patio I said something about how I would probably never get married, because I can't handle the seriousness of forever monogamy and the weight that it carries. The limitations, the non-mystery. Such casual bluntness, unfiltered by my self-proposed life expectations or indirect efforts to keep you around, both of us hoping. Wishing.

I'm slowly realizing that we had a friendship. Somewhere in there, under the jealousy and resentment and the mismatch of our personalities within the confines of cohabitation and romantic expectations. Our breakup was inevitable. But there were parts of us that I'm glad I saw.

My habits are the same.
I hope you are well.