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muteD Jul 2021
Your face seems to be all I see
whenever I close my eyes.

why does he haunt me?
a ghost of love we never truly had,
how could I miss it?
You?
..him?

Memories flash through my head
like daggers to the chest.
Wounding me seemed to be the target
before our first encounter.
To gaze, unbothered,
at something so innocent
while envisioning
how to bring me to my knees.

did I love you? or did I love the idea
of you loving me?
I’ll never truly know
because you are a ghost
of my past.

and ghosts don’t answer questions.
my ghosts never shut up though..
Tony Oquendo Jul 2021
In the wind she whispers secrets
in the rain she shares her sorrows
beneath our feat she gently moves
a silent promise of a new tomorrow
Tony Oquendo Jun 2021
I have seen life and I have laughed and I have cried.  I have met struggle and pain but I have endured and I have tried.  I have learned much in my time, experience that you may not see.  Yet through heart ache and pain I will smile and you will know that I am me.
GQ James Jun 2021
Is your life important to you?
Are you alive or dead?
Can you feel your inside your chest?
Are you a believer in god?
Do you pray?
Do you sin?
Do you think you're a good person?
Do you find yourself thinking about suicide?
Do you have people in your life that care for you?
Who do you think is your weakness?
What is your weakness?
Do you have a weakness?
Are you strong or weak?
Are you more valuable alive or dead?
CAN YOU ANSWER THESE QUESTIONS OR NO?
DO YOU HAVE THE ANSWERS TO THESE QUESTIONS?
a distant thought of
an intimate dream where
my life depended on me
putting emotions into words
everyday,
writing something
that makes me think
of myself as a decent and productive
human being
somewhere in the herd,
contributing
trying to raise the bar
of  critical thinking
in a thoughtless world
it wasn't so mechanical
so I would be on autopilot
but rather its a journey
a transformation,
always growing
perplexed yet again
at that thought of being
satisfied and optimistic,
looking into the mirror
vacillating as always
who am I today?
what will I get done?
being involved in another
facade or just flow
like water
lacking pretence,
waiting to be profound
over the baggage of rebound
longing both to be
known and hidden,
letting the significant moments
of my life
pass in little incidents
will I take these words
and dive in deep?
or simply give up
and go to sleep?
What if I had to write for my survival?
Will I survive?
It was so abrupt
Like a string being snapped -
Like a door being slammed -
Like a voice being shut -
An unforeseen slap
It was
a ledge too short
a goodbye too soon
a sudden break -
- **** -        
my heart aches.
Being frozen in shock and then frantically looking for answers - that's how it feels when something we care about ends so suddenly.
We all need closu-
The dress was blue and black,
life is really short,
I don't always get drunk
but when I do I go to church.
Is Keanu Reeves a vampire,
or is he a time traveller?
They told me to change my ways
and I don't remember what I did then.
Jared San Miguel May 2021
Time

In more ways than one.
Some lives cut short.
And so many more
minutes rendered cold.

I haven't seen people I love
for longer than I really know.
Maybe I'm afraid to put a number
on the days squandered.

Could you weigh the hours?
At this point surely you could.
There are too many to not feel
the weight of them crashing down.

How do we justify what it cost
when disaster befell so many anyway?
A mask worn/a life saved.
Sure, of course, gladly.

Fear

What did it take, really?
For so long we sat
in front of a mirror with nothing to do;
did we notice anything?

Did we come out of the tunnel
the same as when we entered?
Do we even posses the capability
to know who we were?

Which would be more horrifying
in retrospect.
To know our past self's death?
Or to see not even catastrophe changed you?

If I ever see
those in my heart's eye again
will I be able to spend the time
in a way deserving of theirs?

Will I show the wait was worth it?
Will I recognize them and them me?
Do you gain anything from knowing the question
and not the answer?

Is there any way to make it back.
Is there any way to even slightly reclaim.
Is there hope?
Is there hope...?
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