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Shaking

Tunnel vision

Dizziness

No precision

Almost gone

Blurry vision

The world spinning

Vision fades

Lights out

Gone today
Andrew Mar 2019
9:32
something feels off
not wrong
but tonight will be rough

9:47
my chest hurts
so much
i feel trapped in this shell of myself

10:04
dizzy, shaking, afraid
laying on the bathroom floor
nobody can see me

10:12
ive started to cry
too dizzy to stand
cant open my eyes
my body is wrong

10:19
it will never be over
drying the tears
time go back
be who they want me to be
dysphoria
blake Mar 2019
eyes are dripping like gutters after the rain
hands are shaking like an addict's
breaths are short and fast like someone who ran a race
mind is stu-stu-stuck like a br-broken record
Carson Campbell Feb 2019
Clouds yell angrily
Rain eats at the ground
Screaming chaos  
swirls all around

My head rolls back  
My eyes turn pitch black
My mind starts to crack
My grip begins to snap

I know I'm not crazed
I know I'm still sane
But the wind still rattles  
This broken window pane

I have to move
I have to do something
I know I'll lose it if I do nothing


I don’t feel okay
I don’t feel fine
I'm plagued by something  
I cannot define

I feel dead
Yet also alive
I'm starting to wonder  
if I'll survive

My mind goes astray
My head starts to sway
I have to run,
I have to get away.  

Something pierces my petrified panic  
  
Permeating peace
Out of darkness I fall
Hearing heaven’s call
Perfect release  



Though I’m still left sore
From that horrid dream
God, it seems,  
sees so much more
evelin avely Jan 2019
I sense a lot;
my saturated feelings
consume me, eat me,
clench my heart,
and softly pet it

as though it purrs for me to move,
to breath, to keep existing,
when no existence is enough
for me to feel alive
and present.
evelin avely Jan 2019
Panic stifles, suffocates.

My throat feels dry; a clump,
that brings disquiet in,
sticks there like a hull, a twig,
and moves its sharper edges
along my trembling soft insides.

"Get out!"
I would scream,
"Get out, worries and my fears.
Remain, serene feeling."
will Jan 2019
Pressure around my lungs cutting off the air
Agitation and alarm shooting through my veins
Negativity surrounds my thought in a haze
Inkblots in my vision from asphyxiation
Crushed with the heavy weight of it
Part six of a series I'm writing called "The Little Words".
Rowan S Jan 2019
Alliteration isn't cheesy
Not for me.
When I use words to stave off the clutching squeeze of
A panic attack
I can write:

"There is pressure on my chest and I feel anxious."
or
"Pain presses me into purgatorial prayers."

Alliteration becomes the stutter into which I
Skid to a stop
Today has been a rough day. Here is me, publicly coping.
Rowan S Jan 2019
Slanted
Why do I slide?
Slide down a rabbit hole, Alice's hole, Layne's hole
A burial of open air, dirt imagined, smothering the thought
that slipping into any other pool besides this self-administered poison
is directed squarely at others, not me, oh god not me.
A brain's bitterness more toxic than vinegar on the tongue
Misery that slimes, oozes, creeps, and constricts every thought
My thoughts, not my own, converting my hands to someone else's
And I watch. Trapped. Sliding down the now speeding *****.
That which stalked and surprised, but I cannot blame.
Cannot predict. Cannot battle. I'm slanted.
Slated to slip down slides of sloth, slowly.
Shredding into sharpening shouts, shifting into panic.
Pleas. Please. Pleasing Pleas.
Can't cope, can't cut, can't control.
Wait. At the bottom is a light.
But whether to heaven or hell
This purgatorial slide carries me all the way
Slanted.
A poem I wrote on the verge of a panic attack. The formatting when I wrote it is quite literally "slanted", and angled diagonally down the page, and the lines were not spaced out. It was stream of consciousness and I had no time to consider poetic merit. I've had to incorporate phrasing based on afterthought. The vast majority of these poems have non-coherent thoughts included in them, and I'm only posting ones that could be seen as still somewhat cogent.

**Layne in this poem is of course a reference to Layne Staley. I had a roommate at this time who played a beautiful cover of the Alice in Chains song "Nutshell, that I was obsessed with.**
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