i was built
on the crest of a wave
and swelling roll of tide
and i was not forged
to walk on my knees
just so that others may
know peace

Esther Krenzin

we are fish out of water
landlocked somewhere
we’d rather not be
and it is our own hands
that sew our gills shut
so that we cannot
b r e a t h e

Esther Krenzin

Every day
I run boxes
To the doorsteps of -
Magnificent houses
With stone porches
And towering windows
That smell like wood fires
During the winter
And flowers during the summers
With driveways that stretch nearly a mile
Winding
Winding
Winding
Down hills
To overlook acres, many acres
Of land
They are materialized dreams

And on every
mountainous stone porch
Or tree trunk of a door
Or posted at the very bottom of the endless winding drive-
There is a doormat
Or a plaque
A cut metal sign
"The Miller's"
"THE SHERMANS"
"Svobda"
"Kate & Rex"

And I am momentarily so sad
So jealous
Because that is all I want

The woman inside has a husband
With a good job
And a big smile
And her parents love him
And he is nice to her
And he built her a PALACE
And that's all I want
Is OUR last name on a plaque beside the door
But I may never have that
No matter how hard I work

I left to walk on the road
where there is cloud of sorrow
and rain of pain.

never sin before a mirror,
for it will never forget
no matter if it's no big deal
or your greatest regret.
it won't shame you,
it won't hurt you,
it won't blackmail you, nor bribe
but if a mirror knows a secret,
you’re as good as dead inside.