There are things
Only a trained eye can see
While others
Go through life so obliviously

To see your loved ones
Die in a car crash
A thousand times
Dying over and over
Because the images just won't leave your mind

A body burning
In an oven
Begging for someone
To save him
The heat slowly eats
Away at his skin

An unknown person
Faceless
Nameless
Skinned alive
Lies in a meat cooler
Blending in with
the animals
Who shared the same fate

There are things
That only a trained eye can see
A pool of blood
With no visible source
The grim reaper
Has taken his hold on you
And you can't run
From these delusions
That plague
You

With a twist
Of a
Blade
All my pain
Is erased

As the blood
Flows strong
My existence
Is replaced
With a
Void

I made a
Nuse
When I was
Young
Out of my
Clothes
And tried to
Suffocate myself
Because I hated
Everything
That had to do with me

But that never got me far
For I'm still here
Living
Breathing air
Much to my despair

I never asked to be born this way
Maybe if I was consulted I's be okay
But I wasn't - I don't know what to say
My times running short, my choices limited each day

* * *

You said you think I'm brave
because I can speak my mind
I don't think I'm brave
'cause if I were I would've taken my life

* * *

I'm a coward of the worst kind
One that uses a mask to hide behind

* * *

It's so easy to forget when I'm with you
You make me happy just being alive
But the moment you leave
and I'm left on my own,
My thoughts scream at me
and there's no where to hide

* * *

*Practice make better but I've
     been practicing for years.
Nothings gotten any better, in
      fact all my fears
Are only getting stronger, and
     I'm fighting back tears
'Cause they say practice makes
      better, but I don't think I could take another year.