I watch them fold up into my palm
And I see them take shape, as lines are drawn
Always looking down, lost but ever found
Until I found the one, who broke my solemn crown

Now, I stand here shaken
Unsure of what to do
Because everything inside me
I've found the same in you

So I tried for simple
And I tried to rearrange
I tried for love, but defiant, nothing changed
I tried to follow, this path I've since refused
Because now I know, I never should have tried
And for you, I refuse to lose

I can see it building higher, behind your searching eyes
Looking for a reason, confusion on the rise
I know you thought that you had broken through
To be left vacant, as my own I do reprise

And I don't know why this world keeps turning for me
And I sure as hell don't think it would for you
Depression and its icy grip
Might be enough to make one sick

If not, for this

And now we know, that this just wasn't true
Tell me, what was I supposed to do?
I could have left with you in toe
And then we both would die, alone

But the time ticks out

And the tide goes out

As my light fades out

There's something I have known

I won't be coming back for you, and you won't be coming back for me
I hate to turn a back on you

But this distance is mandatory

I am for you
You are for me
And what lies between us
Holds so much beauty

She came from a broken family
Which had nothing to eat
As an early age she discovered
She could offer her body for bread

Shame dominated her existence
As day after day she prostituted herself
Being good in her profession
She earned a reputation

One day she saw a Stranger
And she could not help but wonder
The Man had a way with people
And spoke words like salve to the soul

Several days had past
Yet He was all she could think about
She knew the Man had awakened something
Could it be Love?

When she heard that the Teacher was invited to a Pharisee’s house
She decided she would go just to see the Teacher
In her clothing she tucked an alabaster box
Then went quickly to the Pharisee’s house

There she witnessed how the Pharisee showed no respect
The Teacher received nothing upon entering the house
Neither handshake nor kiss, nor basin of water to clean the feet
Not even an oil to refresh His head

His humiliation so reminiscent of her own
The ******* could not help but throw herself to Him
There she began to kiss His feet
Washed it with her tears and wiped it with her hair

Soon the woman reached into her garment
From it revealed the alabaster box
From this box she pulled a flask of expensive perfume
And poured the fragrant oil on the feet of Jesus

Her perfume, her primary form of advertisement and shame, was now gone
Compelled by the Love she had never known until the present moment
She gave up the primary means of her occupation
The aroma once meant to allure now become an aroma of worship

Don't worry that I'm ignoring you
I ignore everyone

Don't worry that I didn't buy you a sandwich
I'm tight, that's all

Don't worry that I don't know your name when I see you every day
I'm the same with my neighbour

Don't worry that you don't go home when I do
My boss often stays late too

But then she does go home to her warm, dry bed
And your damp, cold begging spot welcomes your head
Ready for another day to be reminded that
You're less than human
When surely that title belongs to the one
Who avoided and ignored
Hoarded and stored

Surely that title belongs to me
Just like everything else

But don't worry

Caught up in a cacophony
of curses and the tragedy
of forgetting that You love me

I wring my hands tight
with every single fight
that I watch myself lose again
and again
and again
and again
and my sin
whispers words that
fall like anvils dropped from
the empire state building
and that cacophony gets that much louder.

And I come to find I certainly lack the power
to do anything that seems even of the slightest
worth
to me, to you, to every friend that I threw
away
because those anvils that hit me yesterday
hit me just a little too hard and
I don't want to get hit again because
I just might die next time.

My memory offers me nothing but unrest as my
conscience is put to the
test that I keep forgetting that I was supposed to study for
and it's easy to blame it on the dog because it ate my textbook
or at least I say that because I don't want to look
at the words of life that I come to find only condemn me
for all the things I know I was supposed to do right the first time.

You know,
there was a song You sang to me
the day we met for the first time
a resounding sound so sublime
a melody of mercy and love
washing white all I had ever done
and somehow by some incredible mystery
you won my heart then.

But now all I seem to do
is wonder why I can't hear the melody
only ever feeling guilty
that the grand staff where you wrote that song
strikes nerves instead of chords
leaving me feeling depressed, broken and even bored
and around the song you've composed an impossible score
that I'm sure I could never perform
well enough to feel like I was worthy of Your love.

But the person you sang that song to back then
I'm pretty sure he hated you
only longing for his sin
that he was head-over-heels for
a nightmare he said was his best friend.
He had broken all the rules
Spent his youth trading treasure for fools
gold that he dug up
and buried the truth in its place
He cared nothing for mercy
And felt no need for grace
I still remember very well that he even spat in your face but that person...
You still took his place.

Instead of striking him dead where he stood
and pouring out all the wrath you could
It would have made so much more sense
to take his life
To make him, to make me pay the price

I mean, You never did anything wrong
It should have been me, but in that song...

The lyric rings, "Jesus paid it all."

Oh Lord, how I long
that the cacophony
be drowned out by Your symphony
that I would hear every curse
Reorchestrated to instead sing of mercy
That every anvil that falls
in a hope to fell me
would cast into the infinite sea
of grace where my body was buried
and it was!

The old me is dead and done
only a memory and no longer
what I'm doomed to become
because the price You paid

I confess, God, it's enough.

Her name is Mercy and she says it like a joke,
she shows up when you're thirsty just to watch you choke.
Yes, her name is Mercy and she seems almost like a star,
but she just wants to hurt me, she just lives to be a scar.

Her name is Mercy and she claims to be a saint,
she pushes just to see if you'll ever voice complaint.
Yes, her name is Mercy and it's the most beautiful sound,
and what she claims to be is never truly found.

Her name is Mercy and she's stunning in your eyes,
but you always know the worst will be what she claims is a surprise.
Yes, her name is Mercy and she lights up your life,
her eyes are flirty, but her words are a knife.