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gt Jan 2015
As I listened
to the lapping
of the gentle waves
against the shore with
the falling sky
above my head
my mind keeps wandering
back to you,
thinking how it would be like
if it was just
me and you
Well here I am,
Ring a bell?
I'm the same person,
Who made you well,
You've moved on,
Immensely quick,
That now I feel like,
A burnt wick,
She loves your hair,
She loves your smile,
But don't forget that,
I was there all this while.
Phoenix Rising Dec 2014
****** addicts are funny not because they do ******
but because they lay on beds in every angle but normal.
Phoenix Rising Dec 2014
Love doesn't really change just because the person did.*



So, when you ask yourself "Am I crazy?" and "Why do I still love them?"
Remember these words.
Jay Cee Shay Dec 2014
This is where I sat, beside you on the bedside.
Looking from here, everything seems to be right.
We laughed, danced and chatted all night.
Taking pictures together, we try to project happiness in our minds.

Bright environment and happy faces.
The weirdest gestures and silly comments.
Those memories that seems to happen just yesterday,
We were merry and all of a sudden, it all goes away.

Laughing, singing then conversing.
Just one funny argument is what's needed to ruin the the whole thing.
Just a remark that's not well thought of is what's left.
An act of unlovingness is what comes next.

We fight, scream and throw things together.
This bond we share is what we called "disgust for each other."
Compromising, forgiving and forgetting the act of another.
That's what we do whenever we fight with one another.


Give it a day, a week, a month or two.
And I'll be finding myself bonding again with you.
The process repeats itself and it's never ending.
We must have miss something from the beginning.

Try, try, try and try, we must.
We'll change, change and change, once more.
Nothing's really happening, my love.
Should we give up trying now?

The change did not made us any wiser.
And the efforts we've put to this thing is what fires up the urge to let go of each other.
Standing from my point of view, a cliff is what awaits us, two.
So we'll try and change again till we're somebody new.

This, us, is going nowhere.
We, on the other hand, should start to focus elsewhere.
We should stop trying now...
We'll just be spinning around and around, not going anywhere.

Compromising, forgiving and forgetting.

Let's just compromise and agree that we're both right.
Forgive each other and ourselves for trying and not being enough, all right?
Forget all that has happened including us and our story.
Take baby steps towards moving on and away from immaturity.

"First, we have to move away from each other, honey.
*I don't know if we could ever be...
lest be willing, again, to consider that possibility."
Lennox Jones Dec 2014
Things fell away like
leaves from a tree.
Long nights, elusive dawns.  
Then out of nowhere,
you appeared.
The world wasn’t
caving in after all.
Just a clearing of space
for something new to emerge.
N Dec 2014
Stay.
I begged. I've never been too good at begging, but I fell onto my knees as though the floor was the only one listening and I shouted. Stay. The vibrations of your feet walking across the room to the door I always kept unlocked for anyone who wanted to step into this empty space, where memories of us hang on walls as though they're clutching to not hit rock bottom as I have. You always told me that I was enough, that I was the chain holding you onto me. That I was the abandoned swing set in the backyard that you never wanted to leave, but that was too damaged for you to love anymore. So you stare, as if nobody's there to get your eyes away. Maybe at the end of the day the arms of gravity loosened their pull and let you go but let me tell you, that was the day I realized there's nothing good in "goodbye" and there's nothing more that makes me cry than your back turned away from me; that's if we're not counting the promise of no return. Ever since that day the mirror reflects a melting puddle  of "wait for me, you're going too fast", it was a cry from the past of everyone who's stepped out and never acknowledged what they were leaving behind. The problem with goodbye is it's as real as the promise to love till goodbye isn't an option. It's the promise to drip morphine into your veins so the doctors don't have to tell me its time to let go, we're in this together. Till the last breath isn't the breath of you or me; but of us. Because what's it worth to live a forever without the person who gave you hope on forever in the first place? And what's the point in walking away on somebody who's still got your finger prints on the sides of their face? There are always stories that will go untold, but for now I'm re reading the the volumes of your chiseled frame and protruding lips like they were abandoned in the attic. They sat with first kisses and locked fingers for so long they need to be dusted off by the same hands years later. Yours are alive, and cut and rough. Mine are tired, and fragile and soft. To this day, they still fit perfectly into each other. I don't know why I wore out so early, why I no longer found the will in me to do the things we did as young lovers. I don't know why I'd spend my evenings on dusty couches while you'd beg me to come out with you and watch the sun like we did. I don't know why I stopped trying, I couldn't stop the constant crying caused by a fear of time running out. I don't know why I ever feared time in the first place. It always went so fast when I was with you but as long as I was with you everything was okay. Everything was rolling like the days the tide was pulled higher by the tugging moon. Our picnics on the sand always ended too soon but that was never a problem because we could run home in drenched clothes, have the fun of tearing them off each other and collapse naked into the warmth of clean sheets. All these memories I keep reminiscing. All the younger days I keep missing, the clocks keep ticking and I have lost the one I want to waste away the minutes with. I guess as an abandoned swing set its hard to say goodbye to the growing child. And as the melting puddle in the mirror its hard to look as yourself and smile. But nothings as hard as being the only lover in the hospital bed with none of your morphine in my veins, and no hands to hold onto. No final breath for both of us. Only the realization that the only good in this goodbye, is that I won't leave me with memories of us. It'll leave you with the memory of me, clutching onto the walls so they don't hit rock bottom as I have.
Phoenix Rising Dec 2014
I hope you know what love really is

and if you don't, I hope you learn one day
That love isn't a possessive way
and if you let your ego lead
You are sure to feel jealousy, pain, and greed

Love takes maturity

because it doesn't always work out they way you'd like
You need to be able to understand so you won't have spite
Love goes deeper than skin
and it touches within

You want them to be happy and even if that means letting go*

A smile on your face will still exist
You are genuinely happy for them and love has taught you to subsist
They are still around breathing the air you breathe
and that alone will always keep you relieved


Love teaches lessons that stick with you till the end
How I have felt once in my life and am blessed to say I have experienced such. I still love him to this day and always will.
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